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May 2, 2012

Finally, A Singles' Cruise For The One Percent!

Cost: $14,455, not including airfare. No gold-diggers allowed.

YouTube Is Launching A Lady Channel With Stars Like Jennifer Garner

The channel, called Wigs, will feature a number of original web series, all of them telling stories about women. They'll be produced and directed by top Hollywood directors and feature actresses like Jennifer Garner, Julia Stiles, America Ferrera, and Dakota Fanning.

A Joke About "Three Wives" Re-Ignites Jewish, Muslim Tensions At California College

A student at the University of California, San Diego posed in a keffiyeh, infuriating Muslim classmates. Now the campus is reckoning with a bitter divide on Israel, a deleted article in the student newspaper, and a conservative Israeli politician coming to town. [Updated]

Sarah Phillips, "The ESPN Con Artist": A Guide

She's become the most maligned woman on the Internet. Why?

Which Is Worse? Mexican Cuisine

Do you opt for the sweet-yet-tart margarita or the fruity and refreshing sangria? Which is worse?

Pokemon Conquest Preview For DS From 1UP.com

For the best Previews of Pokemon Conquest for DS, check out this page on 1UP.com

Tyson Chandler Gave The Best Award Speech Ever

The Knicks center won Defensive Player of The Year. How did he respond?

20 Examples Of Nail Armor, The Nail Trend That'll Definitely Poke An Eye Out

Get yourself acquainted with the new hot jewelry accessory now because it is totally and completely dangerous. Somebody's gonna lose an eye with these things, I can just FEEL it.

"Perfect Strangers" Game Reveals Users' Secret Wishes

Someone made a "Perfect Strangers" video game where you type in a wish, then play as Balki wins points to make your wish come true. The game kind of cool, but the real payoff comes at the end when they show all the other players "wishes". Some are jokes, but some are awkwardly earnest (mine was "eat pizza" which is pretty honest -- I'm hungry).

Did "Snow White" Plagiarize This Poster Art?

It's not exactly a common theme. But of course, human creativity does repeat. So, outright theft or creepy coincidence?

Ke$ha Wears The American Flag On Her Face

For the V Magazine's cover shoot. So patriotic! Or something.

If "Star Wars" Invaded Old Arcade Games

Wouldn't it make more sense for the Millenium Falcon to be chasing TIE Fighters? Oh who, am I kidding? I can't stay mad at these awesome MJ Cowen designs!

Mitt Romney No Habla Español

The Republican has barely spoken to the Spanish-language media. But pointing to Obama's shortcomings may be enough.

My Cat Jeoffry

In 1757, the poet Christopher Smart was confined, alone, in a lunatic asylum in London. He would remain there for six years with only one friend for company - his cat, Jeoffry. The poem that Smart wrote about Jeoffry (part of a larger piece called "Jubilate Agno") is one of the loveliest ever written.

Happy 40th Birthday, Dwayne: 40 Great Moments Of The Rock

Via Facebook: I spent every day of my 30's puttin' in hard work.. So today, I can turn 40 and say with a big ass smile.. I'm just gettin'

This Is The Most Uplifting Story You'll Read Today

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers signed Eric LeGrand, who was paralyzed from the neck down while playing for Rutgers in 2010, to their 90-man offseason roster

42 Things You'll Only See In China

Alternate title: 42 reasons why I need to go to China. NOW. See also: 52 Things You’ll Only See In America.

The Answer To Your Grilled Cheese Dilemma

Say hello to Toastabags the "mess-proof way to make grilled cheese in your toaster." A pack of three sells for ONLY $9.99. Another first world problem solved!

26 Drugs Facing FDA Approval In 2012

BOSTON (TheStreet) -- Here's an updated list of biotech and pharmaceutical companies with pending FDA drug approval decisions for the rest of 2012.

Artists That Saved My Life: Sigur Ros Photo

I had an amazing best friend when I was a teenager. He was the only one I knew who was interested in spiritual stuff so we'd read all these metaphysical books and spend long nights awake discussing things. He always made me eggs for breakfast and to…

Everything I Didn't Learn From Taking A Personal Genome Test

Instead of dramatic scientific breakthroughs, the most successful outgrowth has been a crop of VC-fueled personal genetics companies. The concept is simple: for a fee, they’ll tell you everything science knows about your genes. The most popular Amer…

16 Gross Pizzas From International Pizza Huts

Other countries and the stuff they eat are, like, totally weird, amirite?

Fascinating Trivia You Didn't Know About "Wings"

Not that "Wings"! Bonus Fact: Until today, most you didn't even know "Wings" was the most celebrated and accoladed silent film of all time.

Who Has The Worst Commenters On The Internet? An Investigation

It's troll vs. troll in a fight to the death (of discourse). Spoiler: everybody loses.

How To Draw R2-D2 In 12 Easy Steps

This sure would've come in handy when I was 5.

The NFL Community Mourns Junior Seau

Football players and coaches took to Twitter to remember one of the greatest linebackers in NFL history, who died today at age 43.

Awesome, Powerful Pro-Gay Rap Song

"Gay is okay, the number one thing a rapper shouldn't say, I said it anyway." From Texas hip hop artist Adair (who is straight), here's a really touching song called "Ben" that calls out homophobia in the rap community and says to gay kids, "It doesn't just get better, it gets awesome, homie."

Wall Street Escort Wishes She Could Tell Clients: "You're Really Small And You're Bad In Bed"

"They have big egos and are big babies. If I make any sign that they're not the best lover, or that their dick wasn't the biggest dick I've ever seen, they start asking all these questions and putting me down."

Amanda Seyfried As Linda Lovelace And Other Links

A movie about the abuse and coercion of a 70s adult film star legend never looked so sexy. Plus teenagers are eschewing summer jobs to their detriment and British spy internal investigations give up easily.

20 Rules For Dating Zac Efron

Want to date Zac Efron? THOUGHT SO. Follow these 20 rules to guarantee that he'll fall in love with you*.

40 Pictures Of The Tannest Woman In The Universe

Patricia Krentcil is the mother who is accused of taking her 5-year-old daughter into a tanning bed. She is also the tannest woman you have ever seen.

Photo: Barack Obama's New York Girlfriend

David Maraniss writes in his new biography about Barack Obama's relationship with Genevieve Cook, the daughter of an Australian diplomat, beginning in 1984, when she was 25 and he was 22. Here is a picture of a woman identified as Cook in the 1978 yearbook of Swarthmore College, which she attended.

Junior Seau Is Dead

According to a continually updating report from TMZ.com, former San Diego Chargers linebacker and NFL 1990s All-Decade Team member Junior Seau has been involved in a possible shooting and may be dead. Whoa.

Sofia Vergara In A, Shall We Say, "Revealing" GQ Photo Shoot

Mexican GQ is so much better than any other kind of GQ. Yes. Yes that is a see through top. Yes. Yes I do deserve your thanks.

Reuters' Occupy Turnaround

Reuters attracted quite a bit of blowback for its video calling May Day a "dud" yesterday. "A diverse set of views," social media editor de Rosa says.

Ten-Time All-Pro Junior Seau Is Dead

One of the NFL's greatest linebackers died today, reportedly from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the chest. He was 43 years old.

The Bubbles We Aren't Talking About

Everybody's talking about whether or not we're in a "tech bubble." But should we be worried about other kinds of bubbles?

Innocent California Student Forced To Drink Own Urine

Daniel Chong was "forgotten about" in a DEA holding cell for five days -- during which time he drank his own urine, lost his mind, and cut himself with glass -- until authorities finally heard his screams and remembered he was there. He should get a "get out of jail free for life" card for this.

Khloe Kardashian Says Divorce Is Not An Option

Khloe Kardashian tells 'People' why she and Lamar Odom decided to take a break from 'Khloe & Lamar' -- and why "divorce is not an option."

The E.T. Moth Looks As Glorious As It Sounds

If all moths looked like this would people finally like them more than butterflies? We certainly think so.

Professor Farnsworth Inception

Holy Mother of God. This. Changes. Everything.

New Zealand Gets Its Own "Jersey Shore" Called "The GC"

The GC is about to be New Zealand's hottest new reality series that's "about a group of Kiwis trying chasing their dream on the Gold Coast." I guess there really are guidos everywhere.

20 Dogs Who Can Bike Better Than You

So much balance, so much grace. I wish I could ride like these guys.

The Ryan Gosling Workout

In hopes of testing out MillionShort — the search engine that removes the top million hits, leaving only the crap — I typed "Ryan Gosling" into the search bar. What I found was a totally misleading, stupid website.

After May Day, Occupiers Face A Choice

On display in New York, a peaceful protest march with liberal groups, and an anarchist "black bloc.

Hipster Cop Hated Electro Before It Was Cool

See Hipster Cop like you've probably never seen him before as he shuts down former Le Tigre alum JD Samson's MEN at a May Day rally.

16 Revelations About Young Barack Obama From His Ex-Girlfriends

The President was quite the paramour. From the Vanity Fair article excerpting the upcoming book by David Maraniss, Becoming Obama. Here are the most revealing moments from the letters and journals of two of Barack Obama's girlfriends from the early '80s, Alex McNear and Genevieve Cook, when the young Columbia grad was struggling to find his way in New York City.

Sad Basset Hound Just Wants You To Love Him For Who He Is

This basset hound is sorry for everything it has done wrong to you and wants you to accept this flower as part of his apology. After all, he is only dog.

Document: How The Obama Administration Is Selling Health Care Law

A source forwards this copy of a 20-page Obama Administration PowerPoint presentation, circulated by the Department of Health and Human Services to allies. The aim: Making the unpopular law more politically saleable. Read the whole thing here.

Mirena And Me: Why I Broke Up With My IUD

After two chemical pregnancies, developing migraines, and enduring excruciating uterine pain, I finally parted ways with my Mirena. Who knew one little piece of plastic could do so much?

Obiwan Kenobi Arrested In California

For real. His name is Obiwan Kenobi.

The Many Rainbows Of Singapore

Did you know that there are areas of Singapore that look like a magical land of candy and rainbows? I want to live in a world that looks like this.

Meet Tulisa, The "Sexiest Woman In The World"

The British "X-Factor" judge made a sex tape, was in a band called N-Dubz, and has just been named FHM's "Sexiest Woman In The World." So... who the hell is she? Allow me to explain.

Searching Like It's 1999

Million Short is a search engine with a clever trick: it skips the top million results and takes you straight to the garbage. Remember when all we had was Altavista and Yahoo? This is like that, and I love it.

The 8 Hardest Looks Obama Gave During His Speech In Afghanistan

Don't front like you wouldn't be muggin the cameras if you were the president of the U.S.A.

1960s Tiparillo Ads Were Very, Very Chesty

It's the Mad Men Sexist Ads of the Week. This week, six Tiparillo ads. Must read: the overt copy (the copy's down a bit, guys) on all of these.

Sharks Mounted With Laser Beams

Evil villains everywhere rejoice! Is it just me or is that shark smiling?

Seth Meyers: "There's No One More Hilarious To Have Mad At You Than Donald Trump"

On the "Late Show" last night, Seth Meyers and Dave had a nice chat about how the Don can dish it, but can't take it. Ever since last years White House Correspondents dinner — where Seth made more than a few jokes at Donald's expense — Mr. Trump has been very bitter towards Seth. He also won't go on Letterman anymore since he made fun of him too.

History Of Whistling

These guys cover 98 years worth of whistling in about 3 minutes. I can't tell if this is super impressive or super annoying.

Jessica Simpson Gives Birth To Baby Girl

PPrego Jess Simpson finally popped! The buxom blonde supernova welcomed a little baby girl named Maxwell Drew today, and reports are that mom and baby are healthy and well. The next question fans want to know: How on earth is she going to drop that …

Why The Occupy Wall Street Movement Exists

Priscilla Grim and Tim Pool talk on citizen journalism taking over the media, Reuters journalist David Cay Johnston on corporate deals used to keep tax burdens on the poor, and our Power Panel debate the effectiveness of Tea Party protests versus Oc…

"Nation" Editor: Women's Magazines Are Like HBO's "Girls"

She says all publications need to change the way they do things to attract more female writers — and that women's magazines are more serious than many people think.

Sacha Baron Cohen Stops By Australian Morning TV As "The Dictator"

The General weighs in on frequent flyer miles, Rihanna, and Ryan Seacrest.

Hey! It's A Google Company Photo From 1999!

Everyone remembers their first Google Search. Here are the people that helped make that possible. Can you name everyone in the pic?

Lewis Black Attacks The Ridiculous "Artisanal Foods" You Eat

No, your crappy bag of shredded cheese is not lovingly hand-crafted by a handsome peasant man. As he said, "Snapper, tilapia, who gives a shit? That's what the ketchup's for."

The Guy With The Worst Job Ever

Although judging from this article it sounds like he enjoys it. Let's just say he works at a zoo and has to clean up after the monkeys.

Cameron Diaz Was Sucked In By A Giant Fish

She told the story to Jay Leno about her romantic moment with a giant grouper turned being half eaten by a giant grouper.

Bobby Brown: "I Didn't Get High Before I Met Whitney"

In his first interview since ex-wife Whitney Houston died, Brown says he's "not the reason she's gone." He also denied responsibility for Whitney's drug addiction — a contributing factor in her death.

Kate Upton’s Not The Only Fashion Girl Who Likes To Get Down

Kate Upton Dougied her way to viral fame and today, she’s put us all in a trance Cat Daddying in an itsy bitsy bikini for Terry TV. *Sigh* But she isn’t the only fashion player who likes to shake her rump. Turns out the fashion set loves nothing mor…

A Dog On A Camel In The Park

Need I say any more?

Alexa Chung Deletes Tweet About Her "Sexy Karl Lagerfeld Dream"

At 8:50 this morning, Alexa tweeted the following about Chanel's famous white-haired designer, only to delete it moments thereafter.

Epic Rain Delay Dance Off

The Nebraska and Cal State Bakersfield baseball teams couldn't play because of rain. But that didn't stop them from putting on a crazy, crazy show.

Grandmas Watch Kim Kardashian’s Sex Tape. “Two Hands With Space In The Middle.”

I realize FilmDrunk is ostensibly a movie-humor site, but I’ve long considered adult films as a subdivision of films as a whole, and thus part of my mandate. And I suppose Kim Kardashian’s sex tape with Ray J is a kind of an adult film, so I say tha…

Obama Says The Afghanistan War Is Ending? Cenk Says, 'No, It's Not'

Cenk reacts to President Obama’s address from Afghanistan. One year since the death of Osama bin Laden, Obama says the war was over but U.S. troops will remain in Afghanistan until 2024.

NFL Cheerleader Tryouts: 100 Hottest Photos

It's that time of year again! Actually, I'm not sure if "NFL cheerleader auditions" is an officially recognized time of year yet. If it wasn't before this comprehensive list of hotness, it certainly will be moving forward.

The Definitive List Of White Music Stolen By Black People

Last week, Onion A.V. Club writer Noel Murray complained about the trend of people rejecting things—food, films, music—as being “for white people.” “The ‘white people are square and bland’ gag is an old one, and for the most part, it’s both harmless…

Josh Smith's Massive Dunk Fail

Josh, this is the playoffs. Face the basket when you're dunking.

Joakim Noah Broke A Dude's Ankles

Seriously. Joakim Noah.

Linda Evangelista Asking For A Record-Breaking $46,000 A Month In Child Support From François-Henri Pinault

The child support fight between supermodel Linda Evangelista and her baby daddy, PPR’s chief executive (and Mr. Salma Hayek), François-Henri Pinault, is shaping up to be really ugly. The New York Daily News has a lot of the details about Evangelist…

Tom Ford’s Spring Menswear Look Book Obviously Features Lots Of Nudity And Ass Pinching

Tom Ford knows what works and he tends to stick with it: sex. His spring 2012 menswear look book is no exception, and we have to thank GQ UK for bringing this one to our attention. In it you can see a ridiculously attractive and fit couple in variou…

Osama Bin Laden Death: SEALs Slam Obama For Using Them As 'Ammunition' In Bid To Take Credit

The SEALs spoke out after the Obama campaign released an ad entitled ‘One Chance’, asking whether Mitt Romney would have gone after Osama bin Laden as President.

Happy May Day And Let's Be Careful Out There

After last night's disgusting "police visits" to activists' homes (and the FBI went door-knocking too!) you can pretty much be sure today's May Day demonstrations are going to be a doozy of police overreaction and unfortunate choices. Above, a scree…

This Picture Of Derrick Rose Will Break Your Heart

Sitting alone in a luxury suite, Derrick Rose looks like the most forlorn NBA player of all time.

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