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December 1, 2011

All Tom Cruise Needs Is Kill

Back in April of 2010, Warner Brothers paid in the “low seven figures” for Dante Harper’s spec script adaptation of Hiroshi Sakurazaka’s All You Need Is Kill. Shortly afterward director Doug Limon (The Bourne Identity, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Jumper) agr…

This Guy Won Movember

Notice the stripes in the legs...masterful. "Movember," aka "No Shave November," "Novembeard," or "Growvember." His name is Noel Evans, and his body is a temple of mustache.

You Can Make $55,000 A Year Selling Candy On The Subway, Apparently

If you've ever ridden a New York City subway, you've probably encountered a "candy man" at some point and assumed he was making chump change, so you threw him a buck or two. Apparently not. In this two-minute short, check out how this dude makes more than $150 a day selling M&Ms and fruit snacks. Guess this is my two weeks' notice.

The Top Baby Names Of 2011

What hath Twilight and Will Smith's genetic material wrought? BabyCenter released their annual list of the year's most popular tot titles. Here they are with photos of notable namesakes.

Scenes From The 2011 Florida Corgi Picnic

Attention fellow Corgi lovers!!! I have found our heaven!

Students Challenge Michele Bachmann On Gay Marriage

At a town hall meeting in an Iowa Pizza Hut, two teenagers pressed the presidential hopeful on LGBT rights. And impressively, both girls (as well as a third who asked about the dangers of mandated school prayer) refused to back down from the Congresswoman despite the room's fervent support of Bachmann's answers.

Dancing With An iPod To "All I Want For Christmas Is You" In Public

This guy has got some moves. And an awesome sweater.

Rodger Berman: The Future Of The Rachel Zoe Project Is ‘Unclear’

Before noon on Tuesday, a queue of well-dressed and platform heeled women was quickly growing outside a chic Nolita storefront. No, it wasn’t for an an end-of-year sample sale–it was to meet stylist/fashion designer/reality star/editor and all aroun…

Larry David's Rough Night Out With The Aging Literary Lion

In the "Seinfeld" episode "The Jacket," which aired in 1991, Elaine recruits Jerry and George to join her for a drink and dinner with her father, Alton Benes. He’s a cranky old writer, distinguished but well past his prime, and he’s impossible enoug…

The 23 Most Provocative Questions Posed By Philosoraptor

He may not be a modern day Aristotle, but Philosoraptor only seems to get wiser the older the meme gets. From the origins of the universe to the very existence of seedless watermelons, here's Philosoraptor's most intriguing musings.

That Stinks! Ex-Boyfriend Tattoos A Pile Of Poop On Girlfriend's Back (PHOTO)

Love went wrong between Ohio residents Rossie Brovent and Ryan Fitzjerald. The once faithful couple are in a court battle after Rossie asked her then boyfriend to tattoo a scene from the Narnia movie trilogy on her back.

A Revolving Stopmotion History Of The World // Current TV

It's a history lesson and a music video in one, complete with aliens (I knew those pyramids were too good to be true).

DOTA 2 Preview For PC From 1UP.com

For the best Previews of DOTA 2 for PC, check out this page on 1UP.com

8 Wicked Minimalist X-Men Posters

Thankfully there isn't one for Jubilee. Nicolas Hyde knows exactly which X-Men make us part with hard earned cash.

Nick Kroll's Poop Story

Who doesn't love a good poop your pants story?

A Stormtrooper's Sad Story

How can you not feel bad for this guy?

Pregnant Beyonce To Deliver Baby In December

Oh baby! Beyonce and Jay-Z are going to have their baby just in time for Christmas.PHOTOS: Beyonce Gives Katie Couric A Baby Gender Answer She'll Never ForgetBey accidentally spilled the beans in a behind the scenes video, wherein she's filmed playf…

Girl With The Dragon Tattoo: Three New TV Spots & Soundtrack News! // Current TV

Check them out at the link below. http://www.ineedmyfix.com/2011/12/01/three-new-tv-spots-for-the-girl-with-the-dragon-tattoo-soundtrack-news/

New South Park RPG Being Written By The Show's Creators

You probably didn't see this one coming. In addition to a digital game that's in the works called South Park: Tenorman's Revenge (a platformer being developed by Other Ocean Interactive for XBLA), Obsidian Entertainment is currently developing an…

A Few Things You Might Not Know About George Harrison

George Harrison "Living in the Material World 1".Subt Esp.(1/3). George Harrison "Living in the Material World 1".Subt Esp.(2/3). George Harrison "Living in the Material World 1".Subt Esp.(3/3). George Harrison "Living in the Material World 2".Su…

5 Inaccurate “Historical” Stories That Ended Up In History Books

From George Washington and his cherry tree to Sir Walter Raleigh’s chivalry towards Queen Elizabeth, we have all heard our share of historical myths that do more to illustrate the person in question’s personality than to shine a light on their actua…

Apple: Siri Isn’t Anti-abortion // Current TV

Computer firm Apple has spoken out to deny claims that its personal assistant application Siri is anti-abortion. The statement comes as bloggers and rights

Siri And I - Forever Alone // Current TV

More proof that Siri was made by and for 40-year-old virgins.

Daniel Day-Lewis Is Method Acting The Hell Out Of Abe Lincoln

Steven Spielberg is busy shooting Lincoln in Virginia, and while I thought the guy from Bill and Ted made an excellent Abraham Lincoln, I guess Oscar-winning  super actor Daniel Day-Lewis is an okay choice too. In the mid 90s, Lewis trained with box…

Most Strangers Marker Mustached In 30 Seconds

Dani Martínez, a co-host at Otra Movida, drew marker mustaches on 24 strangers in 30 seconds.

11 Adorable Animals To Eat Before You Die

Mmmm, delicious controversy. Now that the FDA is lifting the ban on horse meat, it's time to look at some other tasty creatures that people regularly eat in other countries.

Dog Shoots Owner In Ass

Just another man-bites-dog-bullet story. More awful wordplay: "Bow wow OW!"; "Ready, aim, FUR!"; "From my cold dead PAW!"; "Shooting MANGE!" "The SNOOPY Sniper!" "Man's Best FRIENDLY FIRE!" Etc. You're welcome, America's lazy news anchors.

7 Terms That Will Kill A Credit Card Rewards Deal

Credit card issuers use all sorts of tricks to hook you into applying for a new card, but there are some terms that indicate that an offer isn’t quite as sweet as they say it is. MainStreet breaks down what to look out for.

61 Senators Betrayed You Today, They Authorized The Indefinite Suspension Of Habeus Corpus (UPDATED) // Current TV

61 senators betrayed you today. They authorized, as an amendment to the Defense Authorization act, the indefinite suspension of Habeus Corpus. We are now

Third GOP Senator: Raise Top Earners' Taxes

WASHINGTON, Dec. 1 (UPI) -- A third Republican U.S. senator has said a GOP plan to offset an extension of a federal payroll tax cut could involve raising taxes on high-income people.

Katherine Heigl Heads ‘I Hate Balls’ Campaign. (Not Making This Up)

Katherine Heigl recently starred in a Funny or Die video (which you can watch below – spoiler alert, it’s “die”) and contributed her time to a new charity campaign by the Jason Heigl Foundation* called “I Hate Balls.” Of course it’s about neutering …

3DS Circle Pad Pro Bundled With Resident Evil

Nintendo has announced the Circle Pad Pro -- the name we suspected would be used in the west for the 3DS add-on -- will be made available in Europe alongside Resident Evil: Revelations early next year. Revelations will be sold both on its own and…

This Kid Hates Tom Brady

I feel your pain kid. But this dad is dead wrong. It's totally normal to hate the good players on opposing teams.

15 Pretty Photos Of The Christmas Tree Lighting At Rockefeller Center

30 Rock was decked with yuletide awe last night.

Buy Celebrity Art, Help Build Schools In Laos

Pencils Of Promise asked celebrities (like Lea Michele and Shaq) to take a piece of paper and make something with a pencil. They are now auctioning off the first set of pieces, with 100% of the proceeds going towards building schools and educating children.

Zombie Attack Barbie

Just because you're living in a post-apocalyptic wasteland doesn't mean you can't be fabulous. Barbie is rocking that hot pink rocket launcher.

Cheerleader Taken Off Court On Stretcher After Horrifying Fall

After being tossed into the air and landing on her neck (repeat: HER NECK), this cheerleader is miraculously okay. From the Michigan State-Florida State game last night. That's Taylor Young and, again, she was given a clean bill of not-having-her-spine-severed. Just look at those thumbs up at the end.

Texts From Bennett

Bennett is a seventeen-year-old white kid who thinks he's a gang member. These are the texts he exchanges with his thirty-year-old cousin.

Death To Pennies

These economic drains must be stopped. A brutally honest look at why these coins are more trouble than they're worth.

Full Trailer For "John Carter"

Ah yes, the White Savior trope. Yet even with it's ridiculous premise of a man from Earth saving Martian civilization, this trailer already shows more plot depth than "Avatar". Yeah, I went there.

How To Feed A Baby: Finger Foods Babies Love

Ahh, the pincer grasp! It’s an important evolutionary milestone that nobody knows about until they become parents. (Why should opposable thumbs get all the attention?) The ability to pick up small objects using your thumb and pointer finger usually …

The Photoshop Detector

@Craftastrophies My mom had portraits taken that she was unhappy with so to cheer her up I "fixed" them using my rudimentary Photoshop skills, basically making her into the worst Photoshop of Horrors ever. She thought it was hilarious. Well....*I* t…

World's Largest Insect Found

Adventurer Mark Moffett (how great is that job title?) was out adventuring on Little Barrier Island in New Zealand when he found this guy. The giant, cricket-like insect was recently declared the world's biggest and is so large that it eats full-sized carrots.

Corgi Puppy Running Through A Park

This is the cutest video of a corgi puppy running through a park you will see all day.

Porcupine With Corn

Teddy Bear the porcupine loves corn on the cob, and wants it all for himself. He doesn’t mind to tell you about it, in his Ewok voice! -via I Have Seen the Whole of the Internet

Fox Wants Oscar For Andy Serkis In Planet Of The Apes

I think most of us could already predict this was coming based on how furiously everyone was jacking each other off over motion-capture when Rise of the Planet of the Apes came out over the summer. Now it’s official: Fox is pushing hard for a Best S…

Terry Richardson Gets Naked And Grabs His Junk With A Bunch Of Male Models During A Shoot; Has He Crossed The Line?

Here’s a photo from Diesel Mexico’s Twitter, posted last night, showing photographer Terry Richardson and a bunch of male models grabbing their junk. “Terry Richardson ( @Terry_World ) and his models wearing Diesel Underwear obviously!!!!!” the Twee…

Rihanna Shoots "You Da One" Video (PHOTOS)

Rihanna is running, running on the set of her new video "You Da One." PHOTOS: OMG!

Final Fantasy Type-0 Headed To The West

A western release for Final Fantasy Type-0 is looking increasingly likely with the latest evidence coming from an alleged leak of a book Square Enix is set to release in Japan this week. According to Siliconera, portions of the Final Fantasy Type…

Akira Casting Call Reveals New Details

Warner Brothers and Jaume Collet-Serra are still casting the Americanized, $90 million adaptation of Akira, and we have a synopsis of the plot which went out with a casting call. We already heard the new version would be set in “Neo-Manhattan” with…

Are Your Greetings Seasoned?

The latest viral buzz from neatorama.com

Dating In Japan

The latest viral buzz from askmen.com

2012 Grammy Awards Nominations - FULL LIST // Current TV

We've got your nominations and it's happening live! http://www.ineedmyfix.com/2011/11/30/2012-grammy-awards-nominations-full-list-54th-annual/

Justin Bieber & Mariah Carey OFFICIAL VIDEO 'All I Want For Christmas' // Current TV

We're a TV network available on DirecTV, Comcast, Time Warner Cable, Dish Network, and more. Find us on your TV. While you are here you can watch videos from our TV shows, check our TV schedule, and participate in discussions with members of our c…

Paulina Gretzky Shuts Down Her Twitter At Wayne's Behest

Last month, by way of one of the best photo galleries ever put together by man, we introduced you to Wayne Gretzky’s daughter Paulina. She’s gorgeous, and her only jobs or hobbies seem to be being gorgeous, taking pictures with an expensive camera,…

Talking To Karen Russell, Author Of 'Swamplandia!'

To open with a bit of an understatement, author Karen Russell has had a very good year. Her debut novel, Swamplandia!, has received widespread praise since its publication in February (including a spot on the just-announced New York Times list of th…

40 Awesome Straight-Up Nerdy Christmas Ornaments

The latest viral buzz from gammasquad.uproxx.com

Victoria's Secret Fashion Show: Adriana Lima & Miranda Kerr Photos

The 2011 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show was as much about the performances as it was about Victoria's Secret's Angels showing off a new year's worth of lingerie. The annual fashion show, which was recorded earlier in the month but aired Tuesday nigh…

Video: Breakdancer Kicking Girl Knockout

Watch in amazement as the whitest children's dance-off in history turns into a board-breaking demonstration, with a little girl's head as the board.

PS3's 4.0 Update Not As Significant As The Number Suggests

The latest (mandatory) system update for the PlayStation 3 is now available. The v4.00 update sounds like the sort of thing that should welcome in some major new features; instead, future Vita owners and PlayStation Plus subscribers are the main gro…

The Life Of The Party

Admit it, you’ve done exactly this at one party or another during your lifetime, haven’t you? From cartoonist Gemma Correll. Link -via reddit

Before They Were Angels: A Look At The Victoria’s Secret Models When They Had Braces And Bowl Cuts

The Victoria’s Secret fashion show is airing tonight (on CBS, 10/9C), and it’s always a spectacle of physical perfection. We don’t know if this will make you feel any better, but we dug up some pictures of some of the well-known Angels, and while–ye…

"Girl Walk / All Day," Chapter One

The folks at "creative and collective" organization Wild Combination made an epic music video for the entirety of Girl Talk's All Day album, and it's being released in 12 parts, the first out today. There's a pop-and-locking Ryan Gosling-lookin'-ass…

EverQuest 2: Age Of Discovery Preview For PC From 1UP.com

Next week, December 6 specifically, EQII will be getting its 11th expansion: Age of Discovery. Among other things, this one adds a Beastlord class from the first EverQuest that players have been begging for pretty much since EQ2's release. As one mi…

14 Love Lessons We Can Learn From Twilight

Loyal and romantic -- we can learn more from the Vampires in Twilight than just how to get by without sleep and sparkle in the sun --  they can also teach us a thing or two about relationships. Here are lessons -- both good and bad -- we can lea…

22 Hot Drugs Facing FDA Approval In 2012

Updated with three additional drug approval decision dates.

American Airlines Bankruptcy May Mean A Fare Sale Soon

American Airlines’ bankruptcy won’t have any impact on flight schedules and previous purchases for customers, and may actually be good for travelers, at least in the short-term.

Apple Chatter: New iPad, iPhone Soon?

iOS 5.1 was released to developers earlier this month, and there are some interesting key words in the source code that may allude to newer versions of the iPhone, iPad, and perhaps even a new version of the Apple TV.

Why You Should Apply For Jobs Right Now

Get your resume out there now, because it’s officially hiring season, whether most job hunters realize it or not.

Gift Ideas From Playboy

We teamed up with Playboy to make shopping for the woman in your life a lot more fun. 

Jaslene Gonzalez Tweets The Sexy! (PHOTOS)

Jaslene Gonzalez just tweeted a sexy picture that made the entire staff at GlobalGrind melt into a pool of drool. PHOTOS: Jaslene Gonzalez's Sexiest Pictures Of All TimeThe super hot photo showed the 25-year-old America's Top Model winner fresh out …

Broke America To Live Off $2 Subway Sandwiches Now

Broke Americans are not only very broke but they're also very hungry, and the Subway "sandwich" chain is going to do its patriotic duty by filling people's maws with $2 six-inch meatball and cold-cut subs. "It's a magical price point," a consumer ps…

Gingerbread AT-AT

Lookit ‘em, boss! Great, big, fat sugary treats! Rachel Klemek of the Blackmarket Bakery made this gingerbread assault vehicle. Luke Skywalker is about to slice it open.

Arizona Gun Club Offers Santa Shoot // Current TV

Want to improve the caliber of your family’s Christmas card this year? How about having your picture taken with Santa Claus and your choice of machine guns?

Top Eleven Dumb Songs To Sing To Cats

11. I wish cats were a little bit taller, I wish cats were a baller. 10. Two of cats. Two cats that beat as one. 9. Little cat Corvette. Gato, you've got to slow down. 8. I'm looking at that cat in the mirror. I'm asking cats to change their ways…

Call Of Duty: Black Ops Zombies Announced; Releases Tomorrow

Black Ops Zombies iOS will initially launch with the "Kino der Toten" and "Dead Ops Arcade" levels -- the next Zombies map for free download will be "Ascension." Activision personnel commented that the publisher has learned its lesson on pricing -- …

Turkey And Deer Are Best Friends

More inter-species affection to thaw your cynical heart. Tinsel the turkey was thrown off a truck and rescued on the side of a highway in Britain. When he was brought to the Nuneaton and Warwickshire Wildlife Sanctuary, he instantly took a shine to a female deer by the name of Bramble. Now the two are inseparable, even sleeping together.

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