Reporting To You X


July 26, 2011

The End Of The Rainbow

(1) Find rainbow. (2) Find end of the rainbow. (3) ??? (4) PROFIT!

Japan Perfects Human "Cloning"

OH SWEET RAPTOR JESUS, KILL IT. We were worried that 3D printer technology would be used to make phallic objects, but we should have been worried about the Uncanny Valley.

The Layover: Travel Channel Announces Bourdain's New Show

Network Partners with Award-Winning Production Company, Zero Point Zero (“Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations”) For Second Original Series Chevy Chase, Md – July 26, 2011 – Travel Channel has greenlit production for “The Layover,” a new original …

Denise Richards: I Had To Teach My Daughters About Addiction

What do you tell your kids when their father has one of the biggest public meltdowns on record? If you're Denise Richards and your ex-husband/baby daddy is Charlie Sheen, you tell your children the truth -- to an extent. In an appearance on the Toda…

A Few Hot Tomatoes: AROMA CUCINA //

A Few Hot Tomatoes: AROMA CUCINA Oh, so now I get it, canning tomatoes is akin to childbirthing...who knew?

How 50 Big Companies Got Their Names

Every company has rumors about how they earned their name. For example, it's rumored that BuzzFeed was named after founders Jonah Buzz and Mark Feed. (Not true.) Here's the real story behind the names of fifty companies that you've probably heard of.

The Ten Worst Augusts Of The Last Ten Years

But nowhere in the employee training manual does it say a word about how insufferable the Internet becomes in August—and it really should! Because year after year, the entire workforce endures a month-long occupational hazard as it dutifully tries t…

Man Wakes Up In Morgue Fridge After Being Declared Dead

Well, this is absolutely horrifying. Imagine being a worker in a morgue when a corpse comes back to life. That's when all your training for the zombie apocalypse goes out the window and you simply start screaming like a tiny child.

The 10 Best Alcoholic Slushies For Summer

Trying to find a fun way to cool off this summer? Slushies aren’t just for the kids. Check out some awesome summer drinks that will not only cool you off but also have you on the floor!

Alton Brown On Molecular Gastronomy: "It's Not Food"

Here's a video of TV host/nerdball Alton Brown trolling for the approval of the Alice Waters-loving back-to-basics set by talking smack about molecular gastronomy at the American Culinary Federation national convention.

The Greatest Song You Will Hear This Summer

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you The Lady Tigra's new single, 'Summertime'. Sorry, Joey Lawrence, you just can't compete with this level of talent.

Well This Is Disappointing...

"Honey, of course I knew what it was when I picked it. I love this type of show too. We're perfect for each other."

Epic Whole Foods Resignation E-Mail, Presented By Cats In Whole Foods Bags

A disgruntled ex-employee of a Whole Foods in Toronto fired off a very cranky farewell e-mail to his former co-workers, referring to the grocery chain as a "faux hippy Wal-Mart." Here are some selections from the massive missive along with some photos of cats in Whole Foods bags. Names have been redacted to protect the underemployed. The entire sprawling screed can be read at Gawker.

15 Beautiful Minimalist Fairy Tale Posters

I want all of these for my apartment. It's like if the Criterion Collection handled children's stories. They are the work of artist Christian Jackson, and you can buy prints of them here.

The New American Dream: Retirement

It used to be that a home in the suburbs defined the American Dream, but today we’re just happy to have enough money to retire on, according to a new survey produced for MainStreet.

Chinese Couple Convert Kids Into Cash

Real life. Now more horrifying than The Onion. You know, I sometimes threaten to sell my kids to the circus if they're bad, but that's the crux. It's a threat. Get it together people!

40 Color Photos Of Wales In The Victorian Era

These pictures were all taken using black and white negatives with Photochrom technology, enabling them to be developed in color, despite being taken during 1890-1900. Take a seemingly unreal tour of Wales from a century ago, via castles, rivers, towns, and beaches.

The World's Youngest Rock Band

While most of these little guys probably still have a bedtime, they still rock out pretty hard. This group of 5, known as "Haunted By Heroes" are only 10 years old. We can safely surmise that they are probably not out partying all night. Guess you never know!

Soros Returns Capital, Avoids Dodd Frank

Soros will return money to investors by the end of the year, Bloomberg reported Tuesday, citing two people briefed on the matter. Soros Fund Management will focus on managing assets for his family, according to a letter to the firm's investors. Soro…

Gene Simmons Finally Proposes To Shannon Tweed

After many heated arguments during press rounds last month, a possible engagement for the 28-year couple comes as a shock!

Amanda Knox Appeal: Police Dropped Meredith Kercher's Bloodied Bra On Floor

Knox, 24, pictured, is serving 26 years for the murder of British student Meredith Kercher, 21, who was found semi-naked with her throat cut in her bedroom of the house the two shared.

Favorite Books Of The Secretly Jerky

Secretly Thinks You’re an Idiot: American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis. Really, we can lump the whole Ellis oeuvre in here. Less Than Zero. Rules of Attraction. Whatever. Dude has an issue with ladies, ladies with their tiresome “thoughts” and “emotio…

The Saddest Scene In Movie History (According To Science)

Scientists trying to identify film clips that could "reliably elicit a strong emotional response" in the lab spent years testing hundreds of different clips on subjects only to discover that the secret lay in a young Ricky Schroder.

Awesome Portal Rap Song

If you've ever played Portal, you've had every thought that exists in this awesome rap song. Except maybe the one about punching your roommate in the groin, but maybe that one too. I don't know your life.

25 Fairy Tale Vistas Of Romania

Vampires and werewolves and breath-taking views, oh my! Home to Transylvania, arguably the center of modern vampire mythos, Romania can also lay claim to the origin of our current concept of werewolves. With stunning and haunting views like these, it's easy to see why.

Upside Down Bird Is Always Showing Off

You know those two other birds are like, "Enough Charles. How many times must you do this? Yes. We know you're very impressive." I don't know why I decided the birds were British. But I did. So they are.

Spin-Cup Stacking Is Weird, Impressive

Well this is a talent that will never come in handy, but is still kind of cool. A drinking game of some kind has to be involved though, right? Why else would someone learn to do this?

30 Tasty Tomato Recipes

25 Tasty Tomato Recipes

Soccer "Star" Mario Balotelli Attempts A Trick Shot In Game, Fails And Gets Benched

Mario Balotelli sucks. From all indications he's a jerk and people don't like playing with him. Also he's not as good as he thinks he is. Also he can't properly put on a bib. So now that we can add "failed showboat" to his other descriptions, can we just agree that he is the Chad Johnson of soccer?

Insane Video Of Man Hijacking A Subway With A Screwdriver

Wow. A man named Richard Arrocho, screaming that someone was trying to kill him, climbed into the side window of the 5 train in New York and threatened to stab the conductor with a screwdriver. After wrestling with the conductor, Arrocho briefly commandeered the train. The conductor and some concerned passengers at first tried to lock Arrocho in the cabin, but then realizing they didn't want a crazy person potentially hurtling them to their doom, talked him out of the control room. Thankfully no one was hurt and Arrocho is in custody. Also thankfully, someone got all of this on video.

36 Weird Ways To Die

People have been dying in strange ways forever. Here are some of the weirdest deaths in the past three hundred years.

Robyn's Awesome Coldplay Cover

I like Coldplay a lot better when it's Robyn. Other things I like: That Chris Martin has so little shame at this point that he unironically titled this song "Every Tear Is A Waterfall." Or maybe that's a thing I don't like? I'm increasingly having trouble telling the difference nowadays.

Apple Stores Let You Do Whatever You Want

Comedian Mark Malkoff embarks on the 'Apple Store Challenge' to see just how far you can push the limits at the company's stores in New York City. He tries out ordering a pizza, going on a date, dressing as Darth Vader, and more.

Laser Cut Toilet Paper Is Very Judgmental

If you’ve ever wanted to have a conversation with your toilet paper, then artist Brooks Bischof has the perfect product for you. His laser cut roll proclaims “You used me once and threw me away.” Link -via NotCot

How To Not Sleep With A Particular Person You Keep Sleeping With

1. Delete his phone number. 2. Also delete all text messages and call records. Leave no trace. 3. Look at you, not giving a fuck. Let’s drink to celebrate your devastating power and confidence. 4. Let’s keep on drinking to how confident you ar…

Glenn Beck Agrees With Norway Shooter

Not enough facepalm in the world. Beck continues his attempt to drag society back into the Dark Ages kicking and screaming by declaring the Norwegian shooter Anders Behring Breivik is right and that "multiculturalism doesn't work".

Old Spice Spokesman Battle Royale Begins

Choose your champion! Slightly disappointed that they didn't choose swords at dawn, but voting is the gentleman's duel.

These Four People Receive Free Joints From The U.S. Government

Irvin Rosenfeld, 52-year-old stockbroker, recently went to court for reeking of marijuana. Due to a little-known U.S. taxpayer-funded program, the court ruled that Irvin was exempt from possession laws because of his rare health condition. The 'compassionate use' program has been in effect since 1982, though only ten (two anonymous) people have ever been able to make use of it. Four are alive today and will receive joints, courtesy of the federal government, till the day they die. Soo... why isn't weed legal again?

Preseason College Football Rankings 2011: Ranking The Top 25 By Cheerleaders

But if we ranked college football teams by their cheerleaders, it's possible a few teams that aren't regulars in the rankings might actually be perennial Top 25 programs.

British Tourists Discover Wal-Mart

Everything you never knew you always needed. Wait, wait, wait. Does this mean there are places on Earth that Wal-Mart hasn't invaded? Inconceivable!

GALAXY Tab 10.1 VCAM Conference Call: Tue 7/26, 8pm EST //

We will be having an introductory conference call about our latest VCAM assignment tomorrow, Tuesday, July 26th at 5pm PST/8pm EST Learn more about the

Glenn Beck Likens Norway Victims To Hitler Youth

SHERMAN OAKS, Calif., July 26 (UPI) -- Conservative U.S. broadcaster Glenn Beck said the teenagers massacred at a Norwegian Labor Party youth camp reminded him of the infamous Hitler Youth.

The Best Of Chemistry Cat

Cats + chemistry puns = internet gold? You be the judge.

Mike Libby's Bizarre Mechanical Insects

Mike Libby wants to explore the overlapping realm of science and sci-fi and his methodology is mechanical bugs. His tiny sculptures are mini marvels,

Could A New Online Pull Site For Editors Finally Get Fashion People To Embrace Technology?

As anyone who has worked in editorial or PR knows, the process of sending and fulfilling sample requests can be incredibly stressful, confusing and time-consuming. Editors and their assistants spend entire work days shuffling through paper look book…

Judge: Barking Not Protected Speech

MASON, Ohio, July 24 (UPI) -- A judge has ruled that barking and hissing are not protected by the First Amendment.

Comic-Con Photo Diary, Part One

In all honesty, though, your annual Photojournal Essay of a Filmdrunkard at Comicon is pretty much a smooth dickmeat sandwich in the ass. (That means He likes it.)

Oh Good, This Exists: Casey Anthony Latex Mask

If you have $200, you can own this "RARE" Casey Anthony Latex mask. But who would want it? It looks creepy even if you forget that it is the face of a woman who probably killed her daughter. Head over to eBay to bid before it's too late!

10 Babies Who Really Don't Want To Be Baptized

It might be a day of joy for the parents, but these little guys just aren't on the same page.

Cat Vs. Toy Frog

The epic battle.

Father Beautifully Challenges His Son With His Last Wish

This guy's father isn't close to death, but he has already issued his last wish. He gave his son box with a note in it. Maybe I've just watched Field Of Dreams too recently, but stuff like this just gets me.

President Obama Addresses The Nation On Debt Default

As negotiations broke down with House Republicans, President Obama addressed the nation and warned of the consequences of a failure to raise the debt ceiling. Just as he promised Eric Cantor, Obama is taking his case to the American people.

15 Amazing Videos Of Soldiers Returning Home

If these videos don't make you cry, you do not have a pulse. It's the rare internet trend that does nothing but warm the heart. Big thanks to do Welcome Home Blog for putting these videos under one roof.

Lightning Bolt! Lightning Bolt! ‘Knights Of Badassdom’ Trailer

The latest viral buzz from

Congressman Uses Amy Winehouse's Death To Try To Be Relevant, Fails

Representative Billy Long (R-Mo.) compares Amy Winehouse's death to the US debt crisis.

Two Brits Explore Wal-Mart For The First Time

Wal-Mart sucks. We all agree they are one of the evil empires of America right (I'm looking at you too, Facebook and Google)? Well here we have two young English guys exploring a Wal-Mart for the first time. Turns out America is a pretty embarrassing place, product-wise.

Harry Potter Re-Cut As A Teen Romantic Comedy

This is maybe one of my favorite trailer re-cuts I've seen in a while. The later Harry Potter movies always had moments of teen romance, but to fully embrace those moments here is kind of awesome. Credit to 'Thewlis Rox' @ for making it.

Was Jay Cutler Trying To Control Kristin Cavallari?

Jay Cutler should have known better than to think he could tame Kristin Cavallari. A source close to the couple, who just broke off their engagement, says that the Chicago Bears quarterback did his best to put himself in charge of his former fiancee…

"Captain America: The First Avenger" Exceeds Expectations At The Social Media Box Office

"Captain America: The First Avenger" was the number one movie at the box office this weekend Read more by Phil Contrino on CBS News' What's Trending.

Comic-Con Photo Diary, Part One P1000810_edit_BANNER

The latest viral buzz from

Punctuation Matters

The latest viral buzz from

The Basket Cat Blog

The latest viral buzz from

Intellectual Ventures Called Out

Tags: nathan_myhrvold intellectual_ventures intellectual_property

Comic-Con Photo Diary 2011 Part 2

Do you how much it sucks to show up at a party where someone else is wearing the same dress? It’s the worst.

Kim Kardashian Diagnosed With Psoriasis

When the glam and gorgeous Kim Kardashian is flitting around on our TV screens, or beaming at us from high-gloss magazine covers, she can seem more like a doll than a human. But human she is and, on the latest episode of E!'s Keeping Up With the Kar…

A Night Of Runway Models, Free Booze And Kristin Cavallari In A Glass Bikini

Lifelong Miami resident Luis Prada takes in Fashion Week in his fine city with Skyy Vodka and Kristin Cavallari

Street Style: Solange Knowles’ Current Obsession Is Pants

Name: Solange Knowles (in 100+ degree heat) Age: 25 Occupation: Singer, DJ What is your current fashion obsession? Pants! What was the last thing you bought? A pair of Kate Spade lime green, patent leather flats. What is the next thing you plan to b…

Uh Oh: Bob Dylan's Grandson Trying To Be A Rapper

Following the rap stylings of Tom Hanks' studio-gangsta son, Chet Haze, we now find ourselves confronted with a new hip-hop effort from another kid possessing famous DNA. Fifteen-year-old Pablo Dylan, grandson of Bob, and son of music-video director…

Angela Simmons Is Stunning On The Beaches Of Malibu (PHOTOS)

Monday morning got off to great start when we found these exclusive photographs from GlobalGrind's favorite footwear designer Angela Simmons.PHOTOS: Angela Simmons Goes To The Motherland!Photographed over the weekend by C.

Jenny McCarthy Tweets 211-Pound Pregnancy Photo

Are you surprised by how big Jenny McCarthy is in her pregnancy photo? Click to comment!

Hot Enough To....

The latest viral buzz from

David Wu Won't Run In 2012, Kristen Cavallari Engagement Off And More From While You Were Sleeping

US Rep. David Wu (D-OR), the first Chinese-American electecd to congress

Comic-Con: Why You Should Be Excited For Remakes And Reboots

Myths encompass the messages, themes and archetypes that furnish us with answers, warnings and comfort in a dangerous and uncertain world. I think that's why we hold onto them so strongly and want them to be told to us again and again. It's why we a…

Rumor: Vogue‘s New ‘Secret’ Website Will Be A Digital Archive Of Every Single Issue Ever

Vogue has been conspicuously embracing technology and new media lately. To wit: Anna pronouncing at the Webby awards that “geeks can be chic.” An “ Vogue influencers” network of bloggers. A recent re-boot of the glossy’s website. The under-promoted …

New Nail Polish Trend Alert: Magnetic Lacquer

While laying on the beach reading the August Allure this weekend, I came across a small paragraph that made me say, “Oooh, new nail polish gimmick!” A little digging revealed that a new polish trend is in the making. Sick of crackle finishes? Try m…

My Best Friend's Girl Is Hitting On Me. What Should I Do?

Ask TSJ tackles the tough question of whether or not to tell your friend that his girlfriend is a skank

Male Contraceptives Making Headway

WASHINGTON, July 24 (UPI) -- U.S. researchers say developments in male contraceptives are making them safe, effective and reversible.

Snow White Has Some New Pictures

The cast of Snow White and the Huntsman had a panel at Comic Con this weekend and, among a few other interesting items of worth, they released the first

back to top