"I'm gay / straight / bi / just a poor boy and nobody loves me."
You'd be surprised.
Trigger warning: This post contains mentions of sexual harassment, assault, and rape.
Turns out, he's a beekeeper with an (understandable) fear of swans.
"Wenn man zum Elternabend einen Bierhelm anzieht, muss man nicht in den Elternrat."
"Der Familien-WhatsApp-Gruppe einfach mal eine fremde Person hinzufügen. Zack, Party im Gange!"
What does your #best #life look like?
It's an effort to provide "authentic, trustworthy information," this time around.
You get out what you put in, which in this case, is failure.
A judge found that it is unconstitutional for the president to block people from his @realDonaldTrump account.
"Shaming / blaming women for a man's inability to keep his shit together is a very major problem."
«Toi tu vis, toi tu vis, toi tu crèves.»
Please can this be the end of this weird saga?
Globuli, Twitter-Bots und Zitate des Dalai Lama – diese Geschichte kannst du dir nicht ausdenken.
280 Zeichen Wahrheit
It's impossible to make fun of someone with a good sense of humour.
"me whispering into my green tea after taking one sip: you better fix my entire life you gross bitch... please I beg."
"By age 35 you should have a huge box of cables but you can't throw them out because you're pretty sure you still need a couple of them but you're not sure which ones."
"????? Como que fué construida 292 A.C...y destruida 226 A.C....????? Primero fué destruida y después construida..!!???".
"Dolores is cancelled. Maeve is the one true supreme."
Yikes, please take notes people!
Un mariage pas comme les autres.
"Why has Nawab Taimur not been invited to the Royal Wedding?"
Mom doesn't know.
"I've earned every fucking minute of my 38 years."
WASN HIER LOS?
Sur les cours, la flemme, la famille et la vie en général.
"Langweilige Klausuraufsicht. Erstmal bei allen Handys aufm Pult drei Mal die falsche PIN eingegeben."
"Who ate my snacks?!"
"You either die a Yanny or live long enough to see yourself become a Laurel."
These responses are #waytooreal.
Act like a jerk, and Twitter will start limiting how often your tweets show up.
Mum, I am so sorry.
"Who replaced Prince William with this 43-year-old accountant from Ohio?"
"Kids are books filled with blank pages."
Zwischen Genie und Dummheit liegt ein schmaler Grat.
"Let Ekta Kapoor and PewDiePie fight it out and finish each other. The world and media and content would be a better place."
Encore du très bon.
"I bet this family wished Australia didn't have a gun ban."
Seriously, can someone help?
"Another day has passed and I haven't used Pythagoras theorem."
Could this argument BE any more heated?
You shouldn't laugh at these, but you will.
Le cru 2018 a encore été très bon.
::pops popcorn and pulls up a chair::
Heart emoji x 1000.
"Diets are all fun and games until it’s time to eat."
"Single for so long that you start taking ya own self on dates."