22 Hilarious Tweets That Made Me Realize Society Is Well And Truly F*cked
"At least Sisyphus never had to deal with people emailing him new boulders that they could have pushed up the hill themselves." —@joshgondelman
If you think the greatest thinkers of the modern era are academics, politicians, or billionaire tech bros, think again. It's actually a bunch of randos on Twitter!
Here are 22 hilarious tweets from the 21st century's greatest minds. And make sure you follow these hilarious philosophers on Twitter!
1. Modern society is so rushed that we never take a moment to stop and smell the Nacho Cheese Doritos Locos Tacos anymore. 😔
food reviewer youtube guys are always eating in their cars. wrong place to eat. try a table, trust me you will love it.. much easier…
— aLec robBins (@alecrobbins) October 17, 2023
2. If eating in your car might be a sign of societal decline, then this is a sign of full-on collapse.
There should be drive-thru karaoke. Like I pull up, give the guy $5, he lets me into a soundproof room where I sing I Have Nothing by Whitney Houston with so much passion my vocal chords snap apart like old rubber bands, then I quietly get back in the car and head home
— caitie delaney (@caitiedelaney) October 17, 2023
3. Podcast bros have infiltrated every part of society, and it may be too late to stop them.
Not enough is being said about the fact that Taylor Swift is dating a podcaster
— Ira (@iramadisonthree) October 18, 2023
4. Work culture has gotten so bad that eternal torture would honestly be preferable.
At least Sisyphus never had to deal with people emailing him new boulders that they could have pushed up the hill themselves.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) October 13, 2023
5. Food delivery apps give their toughest battles to their strongest soldiers.
i have the flu so i’ve been ordering milkshakes throughout the day for my sore throat and the same driver who dropped off my last one is delivering my current one. this might be an all time low for me
— kelly (@BoyYeetsWorld) October 19, 2023
6. Every October, the candy corn lobby wreaks havoc on the food pyramid.
Eating my vegetables pic.twitter.com/hD70f6P0FR
— Ryan Marino, MD (@RyanMarino) October 17, 2023
7. But at least capitalism breeds innovation.
You used to see ads on here from airlines and banks https://t.co/KG0XQlunNT
— Jesse Hawken (@jessehawken) October 16, 2023
8. This country NEEDS accessible, affordable public transportation!!!
Working In Office is soooo degrading why am I biking 3 miles in slacks at 8 am with a jar of beef stew in my backpack
— manic pixie cheese curd, MPH (@tildawhirl) October 17, 2023
9. Dating is hard no matter what species you are.
If i was a girl cat and i saw a boy cat get the zoomies that would be such an ick
— callie actually (@eggshellfriend) October 17, 2023
10. And being a woman is both a blessing and a curse.
It is annoying that as soon as a woman turns 30, people start reminding her constantly about her biological clock, but I do appreciate the reminder that women’s time is, indeed, much more valuable than men’s is
— Ginny Hogan (@ginnyhogan_) October 15, 2023
11. The bond between high schoolers and their drug dealers is sacred and unbreakable.
There was a guy at the set last night who was hooting and hollering and filming the entire thing. As the opener I’m like this is probably just a drunk fan of the headliners. Come to find out it was my HIGH SCHOOL DRUG DEALER who came out to support.. king I will always remember u
— eliza (@elizamclamb) October 17, 2023
12. Your 20s are for making mistakes.
your mid 20's is about buying a candle called "whiskey and oak" that smells so bad you lose your security deposit
— rob (@OkButStill) October 18, 2023
13. Here's what Christianity won't tell you: The one sin Jesus won't forgive is slow-walking.
Jesus: when you look back in the sand, sometimes you see only one set of footprints
— Janel Comeau (@VeryBadLlama) October 16, 2023
Jesus: because that's where I fuckin yeeted you
Jesus: you walk so goddamn slow
14. In good news, airlines are still dedicated to quality in-flight entertainment!
Obsessed with this woman on my flight who’s trying to commandeer an entire overhead compartment for “her hats”
— Danielle Perez she/her (@DivaDelux) October 19, 2023
15. Finally, a leftist mafia we can get behind!
okay THIS is the woke mob they've all been talking about pic.twitter.com/1I0KsnGCp2
— Kevin Bluesky Handleson (@KBAndersonYo) October 19, 2023
16. Celebs: They're just like us!*
I truly feel Ben Affleck is the mascot and spokesperson for those of us who are Perpetually Bothered pic.twitter.com/EUpTeCuPtt
— Night of the Living Thread 🧵 (@ambernoelle) October 13, 2023
17. Two-hundred and thirty-four years after its inception, the House of Representatives is finally serving the interests of its ogress constituency.
on his Baba Yaga bullshit https://t.co/sULTBaxAoz
— JP (@jpbrammer) October 13, 2023
18. The world is already chaotic enough without a reminder that James Carville exists.
Imagine thinking I want this text pic.twitter.com/3W0XS6qsJW
— Laurie Kilmartin, Austin, Ft Collins (@anylaurie16) October 20, 2023
19. This is your friendly reminder to think before you speak...
dude in line behind me yelling at me "OH YOU MUST REALLY LIKE CURRY HUH" and I had like 55 responses about being Indian lined up before I realised he's talking about Steph Curry being on my T shirt, never shop before coffee , children
— Shiv Ramdas Official Boye Mafia Spokesman (@nameshiv) October 19, 2023
20. ...and think before you tweet.
when i go to unfollow someone for a stupid opinion and see that our number of mutuals has gone down from 10 a few days ago to literally 0… that unfollow was peer reviewed
— Max Gross ☻ (@maxgotjokes) October 15, 2023
21. "We are living in a society!" —George Costanza
Someone asked to share my table at a coffee shop and then asked me to leave the table because they have a meeting??? Am I in an episode of Seinfeld??
— Elizabeth Goodspeed (@domesticetch) October 19, 2023
22. And finally, a reminder that no matter how bad things get, at least we don't have to text with a T9 keyboard anymore!
This was so long ago he must have tapped those number buttons so many times to get the breakup text out. https://t.co/eVLThBZ5pN
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) October 19, 2023
Don't miss the funniest tweets about society last week:
I Can't Stop Laughing (And Sobbing) At These 20 Tweets About The State Of Humanity