BuzzFeed
girlfriends
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Shaq Gets A Piggyback Ride From His Tiny Girlfriend
Celebrity Buzz In high heels, no less. Jump to the 3:14 mark to see her actually do it, for a few seconds at least.
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Video: Swipe
A new way to get money. [Ed. note: See? Maybe your relationship is worthwhile. You just have to get a little creative with it.]
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Scott Lee Cohen
Politics Buzz Are you guys ready to meet your new favorite Democratic nominee for lieutenant governor in Illinois?! Scott Lee Cohen, a pawnbroker, was arrested in 2005 for (allegedly!) sticking a knife to the neck of his 24-year old drunk prostitute girlfriend and bopping her head against the wall. Cohen played the whole prostitute thing blind, saying he thought she was a “massage therapist,” which is pretty much the go-to excuse for prostitutes. This is fun because just last Tuesday he won the nomination in a surprise victory soooo, Gov. Quinn's all like, “Great.”
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Roxxxy: The First Ever Sex Robot [NSFW]
Tech Buzz Oh, thank God. We can finally stop all this unpleasant nonsense about trying to act like normal, well-adjusted people in the hopes that other apparently normal, well-adjusted people will let us see them without their clothes on. Judging by the video, True Companion's Roxxxy doll will not only sit on your couch, but also engage in limited small talk, so she's exactly like having a real girlfriend. Yay, the future.
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Video: Makeout Tips With Your Pillow Girlfriend
Everyone knows the best way to practice is with a pillow. And the hand-drawn sexy-face you taped onto it. That's definitely your girlfriend, by the way. And she doesn't like too much tongue.
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Video: Psycho Girlfriend
Your friends tried to warn you, but you kept on dating her anyway. Next thing you knew she was “looking for boners.” Wait, what?
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Image: Valentine’s Day Ideas Chart
Going by how much money you have and how much you care, this chart should help clarify what to do for your Valentine. Head's up: If you've been fishing with her dad, it's not good news. Don't click through.
