"I cannot sing around the house under any circumstances," Kristen tells BuzzFeed.
Keep these moms in your thoughts and prayers, y'all.
They ask permission from literally no one.
Three trimesters' worth of real.
"For better or for weird as hell."
Teachers Are Sharing The Most Embarrassing Reasons They've Had To Call Kids' Parents And Wow, Just Wow
"I had to call a kid's parents after he pulled his pants down and proceeded to poop on the snow-covered playground!"
"I was 27 when my son was born four years ago. I'm 42 now."
"I had a dream I was talking to my grandfather while he sat in a coffin. I called my mom the next day, and she told me he died during the night."
We aspire to their level of genius.
How many of these attractions have you zip-a-dee-done?
Marriage is fighting fair, not playing fair.
15 People Share The Time Someone Objected At A Wedding They Attended, And There Are No Words For This Cringe
"She yelled, 'I object! The man's dick is too small to satisfy!'"
Of course, you feel like royalty already.
"Probably the worst thing to mention when you are in a fight with your wife is the video game you have paused in the other room."
Thanksgiving. "Fun" for the whole family.
"Kids aren't getting worse...but parents definitely are."
Dads will be dads.
Literally no one: ................. Husbands: "I'm pooping out of my mind."
"I stole some mail which had someone's credit card number on it...and used it to buy a coffin."
But every Disney Parks fan is a kid at heart, no matter their age.