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1. Absolutely incredible Mickey and Minnie Mouse heart earrings sure to turn absolutely anywhere you wear them into the happiest place on earth. Yes, even if it's a Google Hangout.
2. A velvety throw blanket so snuggly, it could replace your S.O. Plus, pets seem to love it, too.
3. A LOL-worthy screaming goat figure who is here to provide the catharsis you so desperately need. Just press him and he lets out a shriek!
4. A sultry lace bodysuit ready to prove you don't need to splurge at a fancy lingerie store (or have an S.O. to dress up for) to feel hotter than Michael B. Jordan drinking coffee in a desert.
5. A squee-worthy popcorn-munching Pusheen plush who is both a big mood and your new BFF.
6. A duo of potted plant pals so you can start building your own little foliage family with zero effort. They're easy to keep alive and are already in adorable planters! Look at you, finding true love this V-Day.
7. An elegant crown ring fit for the royalty you truly are.
8. An empowering sticker you might want to buy several of to stick on every one of your belongings, just to make sure you never forget how awesome you are.
9. A glam robe so you'll feel posh even when you're just chilling on your couch bingeing Bridgerton and thinking of all the things you'd like to do in a library. 👀
10. Some adorable kitty socks that'll probably be better listeners than a real S.O. — always willing to paws what they're doing and be ~all ears~.
11. A top-rated box of moisturizing bath bombs in 12 different soothing aromas sure to give you a ~scents~ of relaxation and make you wanna stay in the tub 'til you're pruney.
12. An OMG-worthy set of pencils stamped with beloved romance and fanfiction tropes that'll make you let out a "squee!!!" every time you use them. Bummer that AO3 doesn't accept submissions written in pencil.
13. An adorable knit sweater so you can wear your heart on your sleeve on Valentine's Day and beyond.
14. A fun animal coloring book for a totally sweet (and under $5) stress reliever.
15. A gorgeous polka dot headband to help you channel some major Pretty Woman vibes. How's this for a Galentine's Day plan with yourself? Step 1: watch the movie wearing this beauty and your most fabulous dress. Step 2: Get in a bubble bath and sing Prince at the top of your lungs. Step 3: Remember to check your fire escape for a young Richard Gere.
16. Some chic stemless wineglasses that are just plain easier to sip from on your treat-yourself nights than a fragile stemmed glass. The less likely you are to spill all over your favorite PJs, the better.
17. An awesome new mattress so you can treat yourself to better sleep — with or without someone beside you (though, let's be honest, you're gonna snooze more soundly if you're alone).
18. Adjustable and collapsible rose gold Bluetooth headphones that'll sound as good as they look.
19. A pretty pen topped with a heart-shaped gem for writing little love notes to yourself, or your S.O., or a friend, or your cat.
20. A 32-piece makeup brush set with over 1,700 positive reviews and pretty much every brush you've ever wanted, and some you never even knew you needed.
21. A badass Wonder Woman tiara necklace to remind you that you're a badass, even if your V-Day plans are starting to resemble no man's land.
22. A LOL-worthy mug for anyone who is single as heck and proud of it.
23. A sweet pair of leggings from the ModCloth for Hello Kitty collab so even your loungewear can be festive on February 14 (though these will be adorbs 365 days a year).
24. A sleek Instax Mini Bluetooh phone photo printer that pairs to an app so you can apply Snapchat and Insta-level filters to IRL prints that won't disappear in 10 seconds — or even 10 years.
25. An indulgent bottle of Crabtree & Evelyn Spiced Honey Bath Syrup to turn your favorite self care activity — a steamy bath — into a skincare sesh as well.
26. The Foreo Luna Mini 2, a sonic facial cleansing tool you can use to banish 99.5% of oil and dirt from your face in a single minute — and feel super luxe to boot.
27. A glam, vegan, faux-croc Macbook case that's the only thing your perfectly Pinterest-worthy home office setup is currently li-lacking.
28. A highly-reviewed foot massage roller for when bae's not around to rub your tootsies.
29. The Skincare Set from cult-fave brand Glossier, which is basically a prepackaged, perfect skincare routine, so you can give yourself the gift of upgraded self-care. JVN would be proud.
30. A versatile nonstick mini griddle so great for whipping up single person portions of everything from eggs and paninis to pancakes and meat, I wouldn't be surprised to learn Carly Rae wrote "Party For One" about it.
31. An awesome hoodie embroidered with a Happy Meal box and the iconic Lizzo lyric "Baby I'm the whole damn meal." Because yes, hell yes you are.
32. A jewel-inspired enamel pin, because you shouldn't have to wait around for someone else to buy you a diamond.
33. A milk chocolate, red velvet, and marshmallow bar that, I'm sorry, not even the Valentine's Candy that'll be on sale at CVS come the 15th can hope to compete with.
34. A very encouraging Good Advice Cupcake face pillow to serve as a reminder you should always grab life by the balls.
35. A hilariously detailed pair of animal slippers that'll make the perfect companions for a night in.
36. A sleek and minimal collar necklace made of upcycled brass you'll wear for years and years. It'd go well paired with a ♫ red lip, classic ♫, since it'll never go out of style.
Getting romantic with your one and only on Feb. 14 like:
