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I could tell you, but I'd get in trouble. it should have been a bit of a red flag that he was always so energetic and chatty... and that my dogs fucking hated him!
my most favourite one that I shall never tire of telling!! I was on date 3! ready to think about shaving my legs! Hilarious, high energy, utterly bonkers - a magician! all was going SO well... but there's a time and a place for cocaine and it ain't a coffee shop on a Wednesday afternoon!…Â
Lord, these made me giggle. when I had my c-section, I straight up told the father of my child 'it wasn't supposed to me this way!'... he reassured me to say that its OK, c sections are safe! ... no no... 'no! you! it wasn't supposed to be you!'... blacked out after that. it was…Â
when pregnant with my son, I had a woman in the line at subway ask why I wasn't having meat in my sandwich... I'm vegetarian but whatever. she then touched my bump and said 'oh, that's a boy'... then proceeded to lift up the back of my long jacket, pat my arse and say 'oh no... a…Â
my dad too. he used to take me to dinner and stuff under the guise of us actually hanging out but really it was to rattle off all the reasons he wanted to leave my mother... I couldnt blame him for any of the reasons, she was the worst... but your 17 year old daughter sure as shit…Â
I said no a while after I'd said yes... we went to have champagne after and I found myself calculating just how much booze I would have to consume every day for the rest of my life. I was convinced by him and everyone around me that he was the right decision just because we had a…Â
I just watched the reunion. I have two things to say.
1) someone just remove his voice box
2) I'm almost certain he hasn't ever been called "Shake" before this and he made it up cuz he thought it sounded cool and if he was going to be on tv, that's what he could make people call him.…Â
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