The day that Red Lobster stock soared roughly a million percent.
Maybe it’s time to start drinking more coffee, then.
Put him on my team right meow.
She uploaded some sample videos because she is QUEEN.
Occasionally your bra tries to kill you…
Disney, make this into a movie, please.
God save the Prince of Ginger Beards!
Don’t email on my day off. Ever.
“Did you feel it?” = The earthquake.
It’s not “just a book,” OK?
The snow never bothered these dogs anyway.
Make them in the microwave, and then quickly eat them all so you can “bake” another batch.
Figure out what to do, so you can do what you love.
“Wanna hear a joke? Strapless bra.”
That’s right: There’s a bourbon out there infused with peanut butter and jam. (h/t LaughingSquid)
“My single is called, ‘My Single Is Dropping,’ and it’s dropping.” — your new Instagram caption