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1. An easy oven cleaner that'll utterly eviscerate every last trace of your cooking, because sometimes the biggest cooking fail is the aftermath.
2. Relatedly: A set of nonstick oven liners because you probably know the struggle of cleaning up crusted-over residue from the inside of your oven all too well. And why not catch it before it becomes a problem?
3. A rapid egg cooker, which prepares six eggs in any manner your heart desires — hard-, medium-, and soft-boiled eggs, two poached eggs, scrambled eggs, you name it. You'll really have to go out of your way to mess this up.
4. A digital food thermometer so you never have to play the fun guessing game of "Will I Get Very Sick From Eating This Undercooked Meat?"
5. Or, flex a bit with a sous vide precision cooker for cooking your plastic bag–covered meats to perfection by circulating heat in a slow and steady fashion. The rookie days are behind you.
6. A terracotta bear that'll keep your jar of brown sugar super fresh for up to six months so there are no unpleasant surprises during prep.
7. A cherry stoner to remove the pits from your cherries and not leave your kitchen looking like a crime scene in the process.
8. A silicone safeguard if you're simply done with getting boiling pasta water all over your cooktop.
9. A color-coded cutting board to avoid the cooking fail that is cross-contamination.
10. An "Angry Mama" microwave cleaner that'll clean up any minor explosions that resulted from your thoughtless decision to heat up a liquid without proper covering.
11. A two-stage knife sharpener so you don't have to deal with dull blades (and a lousy mincing job as a result).
12. An avocado slicer that removes pits with one quick twist, so you don't have to worry about *shudders* "avocado hand."
13. And while you're at it: A pair of cut-resistant gloves, so the prep process can be as accident-free as possible.
14. A pair of meat-shredding claws that'll work with much more speed and efficiency than that clumsy fork you're using.
15. Cheese storage paper to keep your cheeses tasting prime until the very moment they're to be used in your meal. (Purposeful aging only, please!)
16. A roll of bamboo paper towels that can be washed and reused up to 120 times because, arguably, the biggest fail of all while cooking is being super wasteful and burning through a single-use paper roll.
17. A julienne peeler if you struggle with presentation — particularly getting those strips of veggies super uniform.
18. A rice cooker that'll make it very difficult to overcook it like you do every time you simmer over the stove.
19. A pair of handheld scrapers to restore your trusty cast-iron pan and avoid getting surprise bites of burnt residue in your stir fry.
20. A kitchen scale that'll convert between five units of measurements so you never fail the math portion of your next cook.
21. A plastic storage container so you're not throwing shriveled-up produce into your meal.
Some reviews in this post have been edited for length and/or clarity.