Have you ever been alone but not lonely?
Brother Orange had never had string cheese before. We decided to change that.
“omg, plz ignore the corn.”
no, a candy bar is not going to do it.
Like when you mention something you only learned from stalking her.
Then you’ve probably done these dumb things too.
Life Is Basically Unlivable.
“Is this going to be enough?”
Don’t you dare touch that thermostat.
Is it your favorite? Is it really?
Just a tube full of sleeping people shooting through the air. Nope! Nothing weird about that.
“Sometimes things just don’t work out. I wanted to be an astronaut.”
How did we get Obama to use a selfie stick? Oh, because he wants you to go to https://www.healthcare.gov.
Always awkward, in sickness and in health.
Come on food, I need you with me.
No one said being a guy is pretty.
Anything that can go wrong, will — at the worst possible moment.