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2.A bag of Death Wish Coffee that will shockingly ween you from a whole pot of coffee to one or two cups with its high caffeine content (and fun-but-sinister branding).
3.A bottle of BarKeepers cleaning solution so you can easily scrub rust, surface scratches, burnt grease, and even Sharpie marks away on all of your surfaces. Consider any "impossible" task complete.
4.A can of Easy-Off oven cleaner, because your roommates are going to cry if you set the fire alarm off because of baked-on food even one more time.
5.A fabric defuzzer so you can basically give yourself a whole new wardrobe by salvaging sweaters, accessories, and *anything* that has fallen victim to pilling and shedding.
6.An ink remover that'll rescue hard surfaces and fabrics alike from the enemy to end all enemies — permanent marker.
7.A combination broom and squeegee to FINALLY get your floor hair-free. Carpet and hard surfaces alike will benefit from the magical way this veritable cowboy wrangles hidden strands.
8.A package of foaming garbage disposal cleaner so you can blast through any unseen backups lurking in your sink. Chances are, they're making your sink MUCH smellier than it needs to be.
9.A vitamin C serum that's the perfect catch-all product for anyone trying to lessen dark circles, sun spots, redness, and breakouts.
10.A bottle of Finish booster powder to erase any hard water stains that have been plaguing your glasses and dishes. Simply add this in with your dishwasher soap and voila! Good as new.
11.An Aztec Secret face mask, which uses calcium bentonite clay to suck sebum out of pores, leaving your skin feeling smoother and breakouts feeling calmer. Ahhhh...my skin feels nicer just writing that.
12.A pet hair vacuum so you can get back to actually lounging on your couch without worrying about being covered in hair for the first time since you brought home your beloved pet.
13.A foot file that's helped tons of people cheese grate their way to beautiful feet. Yeah, I know how that sounds, but for baby-soft heels without getting a pedi? Arguably worth it.
14.A John Frieda Hot Air Brush to give yourself a masterful blowout in merely a few minutes. For folks with long hair and short alike, this handy tool's definitely a time- and money-saver.
15.A wheel cleaner that'll convince everyone you have a "new" car. Wild what a little TLC and one great cleaner can accomplish.
17.A jetted tub cleaner, because *surprise* those jet pipes are probably full of goo! Soak with peace of mind, having cleaned them thoroughly.
18.A bottle of dandruff shampoo so you don't have to go about your day stressing about any flakes that may be visible in your hair. Even though everyone gets dandruff and it's no big deal, it can get stressful when it feels out of your control!
19.A wood polish and conditioner with beeswax and orange oil to hide dings and scratches and add some natural luster back to any pieces that are looking dull. It'll be a real treat for your beloved antiques.
20.A makeup brush shampoo so cleaning your brushes is a task you can actually accomplish. It's not as scary as it sounds, I promise — especially with this shampoo on your team!
21.A Squatty Potty, because *THIS JUST IN* it really does help you poop better! Not to get too much into your business, but if even 1% of you wants to try one, just get it. I did and never looked back!
23.Fanola purple shampoo to help people with bleached hair maintain their icy look without expensive trips to the salon. The shampoo gives hair a healthy dose of toning with every wash, keeping the ever-present threat of brassiness from coming through.
24.A pack of Sugru, a moldable glue that sets overnight into silicone rubber. Love to live in the future, where one multi-use hunk of clay can fix almost anything.
25.Thayer's Witch Hazel toner to cleanse your skin while reducing redness, breakouts, and dullness. It also smells like roses — as if you needed another reason to give it a try.
26.A pack of Bottle Bright tablets so you can rescue all the tumblers you've let sit for wayyy too long. Don't toss them! Just give 'em the old Bottle Bright treatment and they're be back in service in no time.
Reviewers trying to wrap their heads around just how unbelievable these products are: