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1. A TubShroom first and foremost, because why don't you have this already?! Your drains are suffering! Stop showering in standing water!
2. A pack of pimple patches for tackling adult acne once and for all by draining zits overnight and reducing the lifetime of your breakout faster than you can say pop.
3. A personal blender with a detachable bottle so you can start every morning at work with a full stomach (important!) by quickly making a satisfying smoothie, even if you're running a little late. No dishes, no overpriced juices.
4. A windshield cover that'll prevent bitter winter mornings of trying to get all the snow off ten minutes before work. Where are our parents to do this?! Oh, they don't live with us. Drats.
5. A travel case of floss picks, because it's high time you have a positive dentist appointment. It's also time you eat salads without wondering how much of it is in your teeth (though maybe you should stick to pizza, just in case).
6. A pair of elastic ballet flats for comfortably helping you look polished at the office, minus the *sole*-crushing heels. You can commute in these, work in these, sleep in these, you get it.
7. A reusable tote so you can not only scare people away from stealing your lunch in the shared fridge (grrrr), but actually feel motivated to bring leftovers to work. Prepare to be amazed at how much money you save.
8. A Revlon gel top coat that'll let you keep your hands polished and manicured for the office *without* the usually expensive gel mani bill. No one will know the difference.
9. A pack of toilet-cleaning gels for a way to keep your toilet sparkling without the dreaded bathroom *doody*. It cleans every time you flush, making this every lazy adult's dream come true.
10. A magnetic key holder for never forgetting the most important thing of the day again. As some of us know all too well, calling the locksmith is EXPENSIVE. We need that money for takeout.
11. A recycle sorter so a) you earn bragging rights for saving the planet and b) you stop throwing plastic bottles away in the can bin. How embarrassing. Your landlord knows it's you.
12. A faux leather wallet with lots and lots of slots that'll put an end to you losing all your credit cards at the bottom of your bag (or worse, you don't know where). This'll essentially do all the organizing for you.
13. A desktop organizer for under your monitor, because this'll both clean up your usual clutter to help you FINALLY focus *and* make your desk look promotion-ready.
14. A retractable drying rack attachable to the wall for hanging up your delicates, leggings, whatever, instead of shrinking them AGAIN. You can only afford to replace so many pants.
15. A set of watering globes that'll encourage you to buy at least *one* house plant this year. This'll make sure it gets watered — all you need to do is stick it near the sun and say a small prayer.
16. A tub of heavy-duty cleaning wipes, because these'll conquer scary messes wherever they happened — including on your carpet. Meaning: these are about to become your version of cleaning if you're not even sure how to use a vacuum (and people will have no idea).
17. A bottle of Garnier micellar water for easily removing makeup, purifying pores, and cleansing your skin, even if you "forgot" to wash your face again. Growing up apparently means not going to bed with makeup on anymore. Sad face.
18. A bottle of white touch-up paint so you can quickly fix any scuff marks on your wall or furniture to make your space look as neat and put-together as possible. Tl;dr: that dresser you bought four years ago can still look brand new.
19. A pair of large mesh laundry bags that'll upgrade your washing routine from "hope I don't ruin all my bras" to "wow, my delicates last so long now." We're still never going to do a separate load, so this'll do the trick.
20. A roll-up drying rack, because this'll save counter space in small kitchens (hello, every apartment) and streamline that pesky chore of washing dishes when everything can stay in one place.
21. And a dishwasher magnet for a cute, non-aggressive way to communicate with roommates whether the dishes are clean or dirty — or it can serve as a much-needed reminder to yourself to run the dishwasher.
22. A printed midi dress in ~18~ patterns so you can cheaply stock up on a slew of chic and professional go-tos. Heck, get one for Monday through Friday (but Saturday is for sweats).
23. An attachable aerator to transform cheap wine into the fanciest-tasting adult juice you've ever had. It infuses oxygen to release the vino's ~aromas~ and bolden the taste right out of the bottle — so basically your leftover pizza is about to get a very upscale pairing.
24. A pair of blue light glasses that'll help you read emails without a headache (at least from the blue light). These minimize ~digital eye strain~ to help you avoid any midday crashes caused by your glaring screen so you actually stay in the zone.
25. A wireless charging pad, because you are TOO OLD to be asking people if they have a charger. It's also time to outgrow trying to deal with frayed wires.
26. A meal-planning pad with two sides: one to brainstorm weekly dishes and the other to keep track of groceries. Now you can actually make your own food, instead of wasting all your money on takeout. It even has a magnetic back to put on the fridge so it's almost impossible to forget to use.
27. A Swiffer wet and dry mop so you can rely on the easiest solution to picking up the dirt, hair, and other grime that's been living on your floor. If you hate cleaning, this will make it as painless as possible so you feel like you're living in an actual home and not a dorm.
28. A set of plastic drawer organizers that'll declutter your bathroom, desk, vanity, really whatever needs the most help. Being a grown up = knowing where your toothbrush is.
29. A non-padded supportive bra loved by DD+ breasted reviewers, because it's about time you discover how amazing a properly-fitted bra feels. Teenage training bra woes are OVER, my friends.
30. A habit-breaking polish to finally put an end to your nail biting. I know adulting is super stressful, but enough is ENOUGH.
31. A bottle of Downy wrinkle release spray for anyone who just knows ironing is never going to happen. This will quickly get the job done and no one will be the wiser. Crumpled blouse = no adult sticker.
32. A mini knife sharpener so those inexpensive knives you've had since freshman year of college are suddenly useable again. Good news: you can cook now! I'm sure you're thrilled.
Being an adult really just means you're allowed to do this:
Still looking for things to help you adult? We've got you covered:
— 38 Things That’ll Help You Be A Better Adult In 2019
— 34 Products That'll Do Jobs You Didn't Know Needed To Be Done
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