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    • Quixotic

      I think Rose McGowan raised some valid points and wasn’t being transphobic. Jenner’s quote is a bit cringeworthy. But I think it’s also important to remember that for trans people, physical presentation can be a big deal. Trans people often don’t feel like they have the luxury of wearing whatever they want and still being seen as their true gender, so there can be a lot of pressure to dress and style yourself in a way that will help you pass. Not to mention, you have to learn this stuff from scratch. I don’t think it’s necessarily superficial for Jenner to feel like, in her own life right now, learning how to dress has been the most surprising challenge she’s faced. But the way she phrased her answer wasn’t great.

    • Quixotic

      One thing that people should remember is that not all trans people like being “out and proud.” Some trans people take a lot of pride in being trans and may be happy to be visible and help educate people. They don’t appreciate downright rude or invasive questions, but they might be more open to answering innocent questions. But many trans people just want to live as the man/woman they identify as, and have people see and treat them like any other man/woman. Some trans people live stealth, meaning that they don’t let anyone except maybe those closest to them know that they’re transgender and have transitioned. They might see being trans as a part of their medical history that’s private. But some people don’t have the option of being stealth because they don’t pass easily as their identified gender or they transition after becoming established in their career or community. Unless you’re friends with a trans person and know how they feel, it’s just better not to ask questions until they set the tone. If they bring up the topic of transitioning, it may be appropriate to ask some non-invasive questions (just don’t ask them about their genitals or their sex life unless you’re very close and have the type of relationship where you can chat about that type of stuff). Otherwise, it can be invasive just like it would be invasive to pester a coworker for details after they go on medical leave for an undisclosed reason. People have a right to want privacy.

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