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    36 Gifts Your Partner Won't Secretly Want To Return

    Nothing in this world is certain except death, taxes, and your partner's love of these gifts.

    1. A fill-in-the-blank book to woo your S.O. with sweet, sweet compliments. Oh, nice things about me? You shouldn't have!

    2. A Hydroflask travel coffee mug, because their pickiness about beverage temperature is one of the things you love most about them.

    3. A go-anywhere table tennis set so they can totally crush your cousins in a tournament at this year's holiday gatherings. You've heard enough stories about playing table tennis at camp every year for 10 years to know they got this!

    4. A set of sushi socks that are o*fish*ally the cutest socks in existence.

    5. A Cableyoyo to manage their headphones. You see first-hand the horror-show of tangled, mangled ear buds that comes out of their pocket every day. This deserves its own spot on Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

    6. A rock climbing mug so your adventurous mate can practice their grip over their morning cup of joe. They'll be filming their own Free Solo in no time!

    7. A jar opener for all the times they need a little extra elbow grease...even though they totally loosened it on their own. The gift that will make them say "where has this been all my life?"

    8. A pair of slippers, because up until now you have been the Official Foot Warmer of the house. Obviously, you've been happy to help those tootsies, but it's time to pass the title on to these cozy essentials.

    A downward photo of someone's feet in tweed and shearling slippers with open backs.

    9. An electric wine bottle opener so they can keep poppin' all those bottles at their famous dinner parties without any risk of repeating the terrible cork incident of 2014.

    10. Lair: Radical Homes and Hideouts of Movie Villains — a book of architectural renderings any movie aficionado (or simply a purveyor of no-good) will love flipping through while cackling menacingly and wringing their hands.

    11. A bento lunchbox that will keep their lunch neat, tidy, and way more socially acceptable than that ziplock full of spaghetti they've been rocking lately.

    12. A weighted blanket to help them relax and sleep sounder. Everyone deserves a good sleep, but especially your beloved!

    13. A beautiful French press for brewing up a delicious cup of coffee as well as brewing up a conversation about how they ever enjoyed their morning joe out of anything less gorgeous.

    14. A kombucha brewing kit, because your partner's kombucha bills are starting to add up! With all the money they'll save crafting their own, this gift is ~basically~ like giving them a check for a million dollars. It's also just really fun to make!

    15. A wedge pillow that your partner can really lean on to keep them comfortable while reading, knitting, gaming, or just chilling and watching Parks and Recreation with you all weekend.

    16. A record player so they can listen to their favorite tunes in a timeless medium in their very own home. Bonus: It creates cute date opportunities to go vinyl shopping!

    17. A classy gold bar cart for jazzing up their decor and giving their bar tools a nice place to live. The liquor bottles on top of the fridge will be so happy to have a home.

    18. A Fjallraven backpack they've probably been wanting FOREVER. These cuties have yet to go out of style, and I'm convinced they never will!

    19. A personalized, engraved ring to remind them of a special name (ahem, yours), date (ahem your anniversary), or inside joke (ahem, soup snake).

    20. A hygro cotton temperature regulating pillow, because heaven knows you only sleep at your own apartment once in a literal blue moon, and this is a loving way to tell them their pillow game could use a little step up!

    21. What Do You Meme?, a card game that will make all that back and forth meme-sending finally pay off.

    22. A state fish print if you took a chance, swiped right on someone holding a fish in their Tinder photo, and it actually worked out! The fish are designed out of vintage maps and are sure to ~reel~ in a lot of attention wherever they hang.

    23. A set of artificial succulents with vases so they can benefit from the beauty of having plant bbs without the grueling work of having to water them a little bit once a month.

    24. A Birchbox subscription with beauty or grooming products to give them a perfectly curated box of cosmetics without having to wander around Sephora for hours on end, pick things up in endless combinations, and eventually leave after having an existential crisis.

    25. A pop icon calendar to give their desk more flair, panache, and star quality.

    26. A stainless steel pocket tool, because no task is too big for this little instrument. It's basically 11 gifts in one!

    27. A custom New York Times front page puzzle to commemorate a special day of theirs. Whether it's a birthday, anniversary, or special event they'll love remembering a significant moment with a bit of leisurely fun.

    28. A mushroom growing kit that puts the ~fun~ in fungus and lets you cultivate your very own pink oyster mushrooms! A perfect gift for any mushroom lover. (The food kind, not the other kind.)

    29. A pair of over-ear headphones to replace all those earbuds they've lost this year alone! These have great sound quality, won't make your ears ache, and are decidedly difficult to misplace.

    30. A monogrammed mug that has (the first letter of) their name written alllll over it.

    31. A Squatty Potty, because the ultimate sign of true love is knowing each others' poop schedules. And trust me, once they try a Squatty Potty, they'll never look back.

    32. A cable-knit sherpa throw big enough that you can both snuggle up under it and pretend you're wearing one *giant* sweater. Now that's a date night.

    33. A copy of The Old Farmer's Almanac 2020 choc-full of facts so they can have the satisfaction of being right at least every once in a while.

    34. A Mistletoe candle that comes with an extra gift — a smooch from their sweetheart!

    35. An external battery for always keeping in touch, especially if your partner tends to go rogue when it comes to phone charging!

    36. And, of course, a Dwight sequin pillow that you will both cherish until the end of time, and is basically your son now.

    TFW you give that perfect gift:

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