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1.A pair of Very Important socks so no one interrupts you every Sunday night from April 14th through May 19th.
2.And a lip and cheek tint from Urban Decay's forthcoming Game of Thrones collection so you can be stained the color of Fire & Blood just in time to watch Khaleesi sit in the iron throne.
3.A corgi butt mousepad with a plush 'n' cheeky hiney for the cutest possible carpal tunnel prevention.
5.A swear-filled gratitude journal with pages and sections for your to-do list, amazing things you're happy happened (and *didn't* happen), and goals and milestones. It's the perfect blend of optimistic productivity and irreverence.
6.A 20-piece iridescent flatware set to make dinnertime just a little more colorful — talk about ~tasting the rainbow~.
7.A UFO t-shirt for anyone who loves The X-Files *almost* as much as they love BuzzFeed Unsolved.
8.A colorful, 3D planter with 3D lettering so you can let everyone who comes to your house know your true identity. #mychildrenareplants
10.A silicone lip-exfoliating brush to finally banish winter dryness and chapping from your pout so you can break out those liquid lipsticks once again.
11.A compact hook so you can keep your nice handbag off the floor, whether you're in the car or in a restroom with no hook (ugh don't you hate when that happens?!).
12.The Jeopardy! Book of Answers, which has *all* the questions and answers from 15 iconic episodes (including celebrity games, Ken Jennings in action, and the man vs. machine showdown with IBM's Watson) — plus untold stories, behind-the-scenes photos, and info about the contestants.
13.A magnetic shelf you can pop right on your fridge so you can keep your favorite spices, salts, oils, or other non-refrigerated ingredients at arm's reach for effortless flavor boosts while cooking.
14.A pack of Avarelle pimple patches formulated with tea tree oil and calendula oil (to heal and shrink zits faster overnight). And they come in four(!) sizes — small, medium, and large circles PLUS large, square patches so you can easily treat and shrink clusters of pimples all at once.
17.A slotted spoon shaped like a monstera leaf to combine usefulness (for scooping pasta + much more) with stylish aesthetics. You'll definitely want to display this bb in a jar on your kitchen counter.
18.A Drag Race-inspired travel mug that'll have you answer ready whenever life, work, or everyday annoyances try to get you down. NOT TODAY, SATAN!!!!!
19.A scratch-removing car restoration kit with a buffing pad and polish to make those door-scraping accidents a worry of the past. Your car will look brand-new, but you won't have to spend the big bucks.
21.A Nickelodeon coloring book you can chill out with and go back to the good old days when your biggest concern was whether or not you got your chores done in time to watch The Wold Thornberrys. SMASHING!!!
22.A ~bloomin'~ amazing USB-charging station that'll 1. look adorable on your desk and 2. allow you to easily charge four devices all at once, without tangled cords bringing you down.
23.Drunk Confidence, a game that combines trivia, singing, pop culture, and hilariously random tasks to challenge you and your friends to do their very best. Can't complete the challenge? It's time to drink.
24.A set with two pairs of acrylic dino earrings that'll make your heart ~saur~ every time you wear them.
25.A multi-talented spoon rest you'll wonder how you lived without. Use it to protect your counter from drips, strip herbs AND grate ginger or garlic for easy flavor additions.
26.A few sheets of LED-dimming stickers to finally keep those pesky router, TV, clock, and other electronic lights from ruining your ~room of complete darkness~.
27.A high-waisted bikini with trim detailing that'll make you sing the Jaws theme under your breath but with the words "Pom-pom......pom-pom......POM-POMPOM-POMPOM-POMPOM-POM!"
28.A marble-print Remington flat iron that'll add a little extra glam to your morning routine. And with the ceramic technology and 30-second heat up time, your hair will be looking sleek in no time flat.
29.A breakfast sandwich maker anyone who is not a morning person (or has ever been hungover) will truly appreciate. It'll make the perfect stack o' goodness in five minutes — including cooked eggs.
30.An insulated cooler bag you can use to bring your lunch to work (and thanks to the bright orange color, never forget it again) or bring snacks to the park or beach this summer. And if the song gets stuck in your head, so be it.
31.A pair of jumbo-size pearl clips to jazz up even the most boring hair day — or, you know, distract from how dirty your hair is. Statement-making hair accessories are a super big trend rn!
32.An apron emblazoned with one of Dorinda's most famous quotes so you can whip up an appropriate snack (and pour the pinot grigio) without spilling on your clothes before your RHONY watch party.
33.A stainless steel tongue cleaner that'll make halitosis a distant memory. You won't even know what kind of bad breath–causing gunk is on your tongue until you see the results for yourself!
34.A two-in-one colander and salad spinner so you can wash and dry your lettuce with just one tool. Press the button on the handle and it'll shut so you can shake the contents to dry without losing a single leaf.
35.Slip-on knit sneaks that'll let you be ~flexible~ enough to stay comfy *and* stylish at the same time. Miracles happen, once in a while.
36.A pair of dress socks featuring Dwight Schrute wearing the CPR dummy mask so you can tug up your pant leg in an important meeting and get your work spouse to break down laughing.
37.A tarot deck with adorably hilarious cat illustrations to add a little lightheartedness to your reading, whether you're a beginner or have a lot of purr-evious experienced.