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1. A Yes To Tomatoes charcoal two-in-one cleanser stick that'll come in handy if you've always wanted a more *rewarding* skincare routine, but have always been too lazy to create one. This is your one-and-done answer. Breakouts: targeted. Excess oil: gone. Bed: in it.
2. A pair of microfiber duster slippers so you can sweep up dust bunnies as you go about your day as usual. Oh look, your floor is shining and all you did was walk to the kitchen. Better reward yourself with some brownies.
3. A bottle of Finish booster powder for effectively washing your dishes without you needing to rinse 'em beforehand. Meaning you won't "soak" your plates until the end of time anymore, but you also won't need to be more productive either.
4. An envelope moistener, because this'll do all the work if licking and sealing mail gives you the heebie jeebies. Who could blame you?!
5. A bottle of John Freida lightening spray to gradually brighten and maintain blonde hair without the need for dragging your butt to the salon. It'll lighten your hair up to ~two shades~ thanks to a blend of citrus and chamomile — and require merely a few spritzes. Aka your only contribution will be the press of your finger.
6. A pet hair removal glove that'll protect your home from furry takeovers with just a few swipes of your hand. This + a normal belly rub = an effortlessly clean space.
7. A pack of screen repair tape so the next time you tear a hole in your screened window, your solution won't be to spend the next five years saying "now what?" Just slap this on and move on with your life.
8. A bottle of Teddie Organics rose water toner spray for relying on this to treat your acne on-the-go and to tell redness and oily T-zones to take a hike. You just have to spritz. Not to mention it has a heavenly 🌹rose scent 🌹.
9. A set of laundry machine cleaning tablets, because this'll hit the reset button on the appliance we probably always forget to clean. Toss in a pod, start a wash cycle, and let it do all the *heavy lifting* of penetrating and dissolving residue.
10. A makeup-erasing towel that'll easily remove cosmetics and put an end to waking up with raccoon eyes. All you do is add some water and it takes off even a full face of heavy makeup, dirt, and oil in minutes. You can do this from your bed for all I care!
11. A cutlery organizing tray so you can still essentially toss your forks into the drawer (this design definitely allows careless placing), but now they'll all magically stay organized.
12. A pack of Rael pimple patches for healing breakouts FAST without causing scarring (or letting you pick). They're gentler than acne cream, speed up recovery to practically overnight, and basically ~cover~ the entire healing process for you. Pimples will no longer have a chance to leave their mark.
13. A lemon-scented, foaming disposal cleaner, because this'll unclog gross banana peels quicker than it takes to flick the switch. This'll cut through tough buildup before it even knows what hit it.
14. A set of wood-colored markers that'll make it *seem* like you have brand-new furniture, when really it's just easily covering up scratches and general wear-and-tear.
15. An attachable wine aerator so you can drastically upgrade the taste of your cheap vino right out of the bottle thanks to its ability to infuse oxygen and release its ~aromas~. All this didn't do is buy the wine for you.
16. A Hair Dance dry shampoo powder for boasting fresh locks without actually washing it. This absorbs excess oil and adds extra volume so the world has no idea your hair hasn't seen conditioner for days. Thank you, magic powder.
17. And! A bottle of Garnier Fructis two-in-one shampoo and conditioner to make it quick when you finally DO take a minute to wash your hair. This'll streamline the process to one painless step and get your tresses back to soft and shiny before you can work yourself into a lather.
18. A paw-cleaning device, because this'll effortlessly keep muddy tracks from ever even appearing in your home. Think of this as the fastest and most effective way of asking Mr. Floof to kindly wipe his paws at the door.
20. A winged eyeliner so you can cancel smudgy-teared mornings of trying to create the perfect cat eye by simply stamping on pro-level wings. Will you get all the credit? Obviously.
21. An ergonomic jar opener for proof not all heroes wear capes when not a single person can open the #*!$@ pickle jar. Sing it with me: PUTTING IT UNDER WARM WATER DOESN'T WORK.
22. An address and password log book, because you and I know the computer forgot your password, but that won't help now. And we can't prove we're not a robot. What was our mother's maiden name again?! That's is so stressful; let this do all the remembering.
23. A fabric defuzzer that'll free your favorite leggings from lint and pilling in a lot less time than trying to manually pick at them. Electric shaver > your fingers.
24. A pair of earring lifters so you can prevent drooping or aching lobes when wearing heavy hoops or large studs — all just by changing your backing.
25. A can of oven cleaning spray for getting rid of tough, baked-on spills (my worst nightmare: fallen lasagna) or messes that...have been there awhile. Either way, you won't have time to fume over chores. This works ~overnight~ so come morning, all you need to do is wipe.
26. A tub of heavy-duty cleaning wipes, because these'll conquer scary messes wherever they happened: even on your carpet. This is essentially the epitome of lazy (but successful!) cleaning.
27. A bun maker that'll make people believe you keep your hair in tip top shape every darn day. They'll never know you actually laid in bed scrolling Instagram for an hour.
28. A cat litter deodorizer so you can end your uphill battle of fighting your best friend's, ahem, aromas. This doesn't just mask odors — it neutralizes them at the source! And all you have to do is place it wherever you'd like. It'll take the rest from here.
29. An auto-shutoff outlet for never wondering again if your house is or isn't currently on fire. This'll turn your flat iron off, even if you forget to for the umpteenth time.
30. A wildly popular TheraBreath oral rinse, because this'll treat even the stinkiest breath if you just can't ditch it. No shame! Reviewers say this freshens their breath no matter how impossible that seemed before — and all they had to do was gargle. No more chewing gum 24 hours a day.
31. A bra band extender that'll free your from the ~grips~ of restrictive bras. This is made of soft velvet, doesn't leave tracks, never pinches, and most importantly prevents you from having to buy new bras.
32. A pack of flexible curling rods so you can style your hair into gorgeous ringlets while you catch up on your beauty sleep. Consider these to be your overnight hairstylist that you absolutely do not need to tip.
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