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1. A cooktop cleaning kit, because if you're not splattering sauce everywhere you're awkwardly avoiding the mess. This will tackle grease, stubborn stains, and burnt-on residue before you have time to avoid eye contact with your roommate.
2. A tub of heavy-duty cleaning wipes that'll conquer scary messes wherever they happened: even on your carpet. The next time you spill nail polish on the rug again (tonight), you can be done with panicked scrubbing before you know it.
3. A tub of OxiClean stain remover for easily hitting the reset button no matter how intimidating the damage. Spilt food on your comforter? No problem. More like wine? Easy peasy.
4. A Clorox ToiletWand so you can remove tough stains and eliminate germs not only super quickly, but at a safe distance from the potty. Basically this will do all the *heavy lifting* while you essentially just move your arm.
5. A TubShroom, because this'll catch hair, product residue, and whatever the heck else happens in the shower to prevent clogged drains. Meaning you won't have to constantly unclog your shower — as if you would.
6. A fume-free oven cleaner that'll FINALLY undo that time your pie leaked everywhere. How long ago was that again? Let's not think about it — all this requires is a few spritzes and wipes.
7. A bottle of Finish booster powder for restoring dishes with hard water stains or just glasses you've been *getting around* to replacing after many red wine nights. Throw 'em in the dishwasher with this, and they're back to brand spanking new.
8. A pair of microfiber duster slippers to accept that sometimes the only cleaning we want to get done is when walking to the kitchen. Now you can count that pan of brownies as a ~reward~ for cleaning...😉.
9. A pet hair–removal glove so you can protect your home from furry takeovers with just a few swipes of your hand. This + a normal belly rub = an effortlessly clean space.
10. A Swiffer wet and dry mop, because this'll be the easiest solution to picking up the dirt, hair, and other grime that's been living on your kitchen floor since Christmas. Hey look, it's your tiles — remember them?
11. A Mr. Clean bath-cleaning pad that'll conquer the tub you guys are starting to get nervous to bathe in. This will easily wipe away the toughest of grime, soap scum, etc. so you're done before you have the chance to give up.
12. A wood polisher for getting rid of the wear-and-tear your table or wardrobe are starting to show. No trip to IKEA for a new table necessary — a session with this will get rid of scratches, water marks, you name it. Heck do it while watching Netflix.
13. A squeegee broom so you can easily collect dirt and pet hair (or yours tbh) from hard-to-clean carpets and upholstery. Sadly your pet will NOT help, but this'll be over before you can resent them.
14. A wine stain–removing spray to prevent any nights out from going *sour* should you spill on your rug, chair, outfit, wherever. I'm not sure who trusted us with a glass of merlot, but now your initial panic is but a distant memory.
15. A pack of Glisten garbage disposer cleaner, because this'll clear out all the food scraps you keep shoving down the drain instead of just picking it all up and throwing it in the trash. You know what, I'm tired from just writing that. I understand.
16. A jetted tub cleaner that'll wash away yucky residue with time leftover to actually take a relaxing bath. How? It eliminates black flakes in jets and deep cleans everything in an average of *15 minutes*.
17. A Bar Keepers multi-purpose cleaning solution people like to use for tackling rust, burnt pans, stained tubs, worn-down sinks, even Sharpie marks (!!!). It's true, there isn't a mess we haven't seen. But now (for once) there won't be a mess we haven't fixed.
18. A bottle of Goo Gone so you can easily remove sticky messes (like gum, glue, and stickers) from surfaces without having to put too much elbow grease in. Like we would ever.
19. A pet stain–removing spray, because this'll make sure you have a quick remedy on hand when our best friend has an accident. Everyone can be messy! But sadly it's up to you take care of it — before the end of the week.
20. A pack of stainless steel cleaning wipes that'll effortlessly remove fingerprints, residue, watermarks, and grease from the bottom of your sink. Oh yeah...we're supposed to clean that too...totally forgot.
21. A pack of Scotch-Brite non-scratch scrub sponges for conquering tough messes (why must lasagna punish us so?) without needing to let them "soak" for several decades. The painful process of washing dishes is over before you even THINK to call your mom and cry.
22. A pack of biodegradable cleaning wipes so your surfaces will be ✨sparking✨ the minute you greet your counters. They'll quickly get rid of dirt and grime, making this the holy grail of lazy cleaning.
23. A multi-surface cleaning spray especially popular for car seats, because it's really easy to forget about the mess building up in your car once you get out. But it's there. Waiting.
24. A leather cleaner that'll help you realize it'll actually take longer to shop for a new couch than to just treat it with this. It'll remove dirt, oil, and tough stains with plenty of time leftover for you to sit back down and binge Netflix.
25. A paw-cleaning device to keep muddy tracks from even appearing in your home, which you KNOW will sit there until you move. Think of this is the fastest and most effective way of asking Mr. Floof to kindly wipe his paws at the door.
26. A compact handheld vacuum specifically designed to collect pet hair for making it easier than ever to tackle every single surface your loving-yet-ever-shedding friend has ever touched. So everything.
27. A can of Bar Keepers cookware polish so you can remove food and grease stains before you even have time to say you'll let them "soak" for the next 87 years. Will this work when you....leave the grease there overnight (you were just SO tired weren't you)? Yes, indeed.
28. A rust stain remover, because this'll get anything from old toilets to sinks (or whatever you've been "overlooking" in your bathroom) back to new in just a swipe. The spray gel formula clings onto the surface to dissolve rust stains in mere minutes — water damage be darned.
29. A concentrated gel sealant that'll remove the mold and mildew that's been plaguing your bathtub forever. Just apply it to the area, wait a few hours, and wash the gel off. Suddenly you can stand in the shower without the sight of mold again.
30. A set of Affresh dishwasher cleaning tablets for instantly dissolving food residue that's been hanging out for awhile now. This may be why our parents told us to ~rinse~ dishes first...well now we don't have to, anyway.
You after five minutes of doing the bare minimum:
Make your life even tidier. Check out some of the best home organization products on Amazon, the best all-natural cleaning products for your home, the best bathroom cleaning products, organization products perfect for neat freaks, and, of course, our ultimate guide to cleaning every single room in your house.
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