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    35 Lies People Between The Ages Of 27 And 36 Told Themselves In Their Teen Years

    Fact: RealPlayer was the worst way to watch videos.

    by ,

    1. That watching movies on your iPod Nano was cool:

    A finger pushing the button on an iPod Nano playing a Disney movie.

    You did nothing but strain your eyes (and your Nano's battery) watching low-res movies on it.

    2. That iPod Socks did a good job of protecting your iPod:

    A display of iPod Socks on a shelf at an Apple Store
    Justin Sullivan / Getty Images

    It only protected it if you never took your iPod out of the sock. The minute you pulled it out, your iPod was exposed to being damaged from a drop.

    3. That strong body sprays did a good job of covering sweat odor:

    A product shot of Apollo scented AXE body spray

    If anything, it enhanced it.

    4. That The Real World didn't jump the shark with the Las Vegas season.

    The Real World Las Vegas cast phioto
    MTV / Courtesy: Everett Collection

    It felt much more like Big Brother than The Real World, TBH.

    5. That you had any idea what was going on once The Challenge started adding fans as contestants alongside Real World ones:

    MTV The Challenge logo

    Having to learn a bunch of new people's names and personalities was just too much.

    6. That the cars on Pimp My Ride looked good after the makeovers:

    Pimp My Ride logo

    They should've just bought them new cars.

    7. That shuttershades looked good:

    Hot pink shuttershades
    Ericlefrancais / Getty Images

    Nope they didn't — they always looked like party favors from an '80s-themed birthday party.

    8. That texting or typing like this on AIM looked so cool:

    Broken up text with some letter capped and others not

    It didn't! And it was way too much fucking work to do and was a headache to read.

    9. That Pepsi Blue was the best flavor:

    A bottle of Pepsi Blue

    It tasted like medicine.

    10. That you knew what the lyrics to "The Ketchup Song (Aserejé)" were:

    Sony Music

    **mumbles some lyrics and dances along to song**

    11. That you never stalked crushes and people you hated on Myspace:

    A person looking onto a Myspace screen
    Nicholas Kamm / Getty Images

    Literally that was what EVERYONE did on it.

    12. That Myspace stickers on your page looked unique:

    It just made your page look like a GIF-y mess.

    13. That Von Dutch trucker hats were oh so cool and looked good:

    A orange and army camo trucker hat

    They never looked good — you just wanted one 'cause you saw all the celebs rocking them.

    14. That nonfat, sugar-free frozen yogurt was as good as regular ice cream:

    Stock photo of frozen yogurt in a paper container
    Unalozmen / Getty Images

    You could put all the cereal and fruit toppings you wanted on it, but it still wasn't as a good as ice cream.

    15. That these were so cool and would be a great alternative to getting a real-life dog:

    Product shot of a robot dog
    Getty Images

    Like, it would never take the place of having a real dog.

    16. That green and purple ketchups were a cool idea:

    Getty Images

    Literally, it was ketchup and didn't need to be a different color! Also, did anyone actually buy it?!

    17. That RealPlayer was a good way to watch videos:

    A image of a RealPlayer with the logo in the screen

    It didn't work 85% of the time.

    18. That rating hot people "not hot" on Hot or Not was funny:

    This was just a problematic site, period.

    19. That chunky highlights looked great:

    A photo of Kelly Clarkson on the red carpet of the VMAs with chunky highlights
    Mark Mainz / Getty Images

    You looked like a skunk and you knew it.

    20. That Gelly Roll pens were the best:

    Product shot of six Gelly Roll pens

    They looked pretty, but, honestly, they were hard to write with and dried out after like one use.

    21. That Mango Sours Altoids were the greatest Altoids ever:

    A tin of Mango Sours Altoids opened


    22. That everyone on Entourage wasn't a 100% hateable:


    LBH, they were all horrible.

    23. That quoting Borat was funny and not at all annoying:

    20th Century Fox

    You knew deep down you were being annoying AF by doing it.

    24. That self-tanner gave you a naturally tan look:

    A container of Jergens Natural Glow self-tanner

    It never looked real, plus it made you smell like wet Doritos.

    25. That you using astringent was a good way to clean your face:

    A bottle of Sea Breeze astringent

    You knew something wasn't right 'cause you could feel it stripping your skin and leaving it bone dry.

    26. That white belts looked good with everything:

    A white belt rolled up

    Even worse, they got dirty quick and ended up just looking beat up and dingy.

    27. That using a CD label–maker program made your mix CDs look way better:

    A shot of label maker program with Party Mix 2005 being created it on it

    No, it made them look bootleg and wasted your printer ink.

    28. That you were ~edgy~ for wearing all the different-colored jelly wristbands:

    Eight arms in a group each with various colored jelly wristbands
    Twitter: @qweenpush

    To paraphrase Tai from Clueless, you were a virgin who couldn't drive.

    29. That body jewels looked sophisticated:

    Six packs of various body jewels in tropical patterns

    Not only did they not look sophisticated, they never really stuck well onto your skin and would fall off almost immediately.

    30. That body glitter was worth the mess it took to put on and to clean up afterward:

    Three bottles of different Art Stuff body glitter

    It wasn't.

    31. That you were deep or edgy for writing song lyrics or phrases on your Converse:

    Cute, but neither deep nor edgy.

    32. That you were such a rebel for wearing state T-shirts with sexual innuendos:

    A green "Gettin' Lucky in Kentucky" T-shirt

    It just made you look immature.

    33. That platform flip-flops were dressy and could be worn almost anywhere:

    Nope, they were just flip-flops.

    34. That wearing flip-flops with bootcut jeans or baggy pants dressed them up:

    Carley Margolis / FilmMagic for Paul Wilmot Communications / Getty Images

    Again, nope, they were just flip-flops that are literally meant to be worn to the beach or the pool.

    35. And finally, that the room makeovers on TLC's Trading Spaces looked good:

    A photo of the cast of Trading Spaces
    A. Smith & Co. Productions / Everett Collection / Everett Collection

    They always looked sooooo budget! But, LBH, you didn't watch it for the makeover; you watched it for the reactions of the people not liking their room makeover.

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