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So, Uh, Why Do Robots Need Boobs?

A deep dive.

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You can tell that they're not designed to feed young because they don't have nipples.

Paramount Pictures

Scarlett Johansson doesn't need nipples in the new Ghost in the Shell, but she does need perfectly placed cracks to highlight her bust.

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If anything, the genius engineers who made these robots should have realised that boobs would be detrimental to the design.

Palm Pictures / Manga Entertainment

If the robot falls forward, then the concave part in between the breasts would fracture whatever mechanics are inside the robot. Or if those mechanics are protected by another compartment, then the boobs are literally just stuck on and are an unnecessary weight.

Like, if we're being honest, they're really not the most practical weapons.

New Line Cinema

The fembots from Austin Powers have to move their whole damn bodies to aim, which is not very efficient tbh.

And the manufacturing costs of adding metal lumps to the robot would significantly outweigh the manufacturer’s lust for boobs, making it economically inefficient too.

A24

Clearly in this scenario all their funds went towards making metal boobs, so they couldn't afford to give dearest Ava a damn torso!

Are they just there so that people can tell the difference between the "male" and "female" computers?

amazon.com

But if that's the case, why doesn't your iPhone grow boobs the moment you change Siri's voice to female?

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Okay, so lets presume the boobs are needed: That still doesn't explain why they're so big.

Palm Pictures / Manga Entertainment

Here's Motoko Kusanagi in the original Ghost in the Shell demonstrating amazing strength and zero need for big boobs.

In fact, if it's so that the androids fit into society, then why make them so damn exceptionally beautiful?

AMC

How many regular people are as beautiful as Mia from Humans? If you want your bots to be realistic, give them saggy boobs and armpit hair.

  1. Which, of course, brings us to this question: Do robots need boobs?

    Yes
    No
    I just want to fuck a robot

So, Uh, Why Do Robots Need Boobs?

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Which, of course, brings us to this question: Do robots need boobs?
  1.  
    vote votes
    Yes
  2.  
    vote votes
    No
  3.  
    vote votes
    I just want to fuck a robot

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