Beings of the planet Earth, strap yourselves in and get ready for a wild ride. I'm about to get all Aladdin on your ass and open up a whole new world.
You know that thing some guys say:
Yeah, derr, that one.
It's dumb as hell for a bunch of reasons.
Why?
Well, do you have a beard?
Yes?
Take a seat, my brethren.
Beards are the ultimate form of makeup. Beards will totally transform your face. Beards contour and/or hide imperfections better than any makeup could.
Beards are essentially the greatest form of makeup.
Here's your proof:
We'll start way back when with a lil' guy you may have heard of named Mr. Abraham Lincoln.
This is what Abe Lincoln looked like beardless:
Basic bitch.
And here's what he looked like with a beard:
Check out those cheekbones, girl! You can tell he's totally feeling his look!
Now that you have your historical background of beards acting as makeup, let's look at some more recent examples.
Jon Hamm beardless: Basically a puffy teen on his way to junior prom.
Jon Hamm with a beard: Basically my lumberjack fantasy.
