BuzzFeed UK met up with Dakota Johnson, Rebel Wilson, Leslie Mann, and Alison Brie this week to celebrate the upcoming release of their new movie, How To Be Single. We put the ladies to the test with your questions on love, relationships, and the single life, and they had some pretty stellar advice.
What should you do when the guy you like thinks of you as a friend?
Submitted by leblack1472.
Alison Brie: Ooh, friendzone.
Rebel Wilson: I say get out of that situation. It's not good for you.
AB: Just stop being his friend?
AB: I say just straight up murder him. No one's gonna know. You're not his "girlfriend" so you won't be the first suspect.
Dakota Johnson: Take off your clothes.
Leslie Mann: Don't wear big underwear. No, well, maybe just accept that you're just friends. Don't waste your time. Move on to the next person.
How do you feel confident on a first date when you're actually really awkward?
Submitted by emmad47001a781.
DJ: I always feel really awkward, so I'm not really good at that.
LM: Ummm. Drink.
DJ: Drink. Or pretend it's the fifth date.
How do you reel in your excitement over a guy so you don't scare him away?
Submitted by Corinne Thompson, Facebook.
AB: I feel like it's nice to have mini celebrations on your own in private. If you're super excited about a guy, you can just call up your friend at home and just... [starts dancing and singing]. And when you see him you have to just... Get it out of your system.
RW: I'm pretty good at keeping it cool. Like, so good, in fact, that the guy doesn't usually think I like him. I'm so cool, I'm so not excited to be there, 'cause I'm just trying to play it cool.
AB: Me too, 'cause when I'm at home by myself I'm like [dances and sings], and by the time I see the guy I'm so tired.
LM: I think if he's excited about your excitement, that might mean that he's the guy for you. But if he's weirded out about you being excited about him, then why bother?
What does it take to be a confident, independent woman who can rock being single?
Submitted by April Katie Garrett, Facebook.
RW: It doesn't take that much. You just have to love yourself and be happy in your own skin.
AB: That is a lot, it's a tall order. Sometimes it's easier said than done to love yourself, but that's the main thing.
RW: I'm often known for playing really confident, sassy characters, and some people want to know how you get that confidence if you don't have it. And I always say that you as an individual are good at something. Everyone is good at something, even if it's, like, lawn bowls. You could be really good at that, and really skilful. So you just find that one thing – or ten things – that you're amazing at, and just know you're really good at something, and that gives you the confidence.
AB: It sounds so cheesy, but I'm a big believer in daily affirmations. I think the way you talk to yourself, even in your head – it's like training a muscle. Every time you look in the mirror, you think, "oh, I'm amazing, I can do this, I do feel good" – it does change the way you think and feel about yourself.
DJ: Just don't give a fuuuck.
LM: Be super clear on who you are.
DJ: Be good to yourself, have respect for yourself.
LM: Yeah. And then other people will be good to you and respect you. And that's a start, anyway.
How do you get over a relationship that ended badly?
Submitted by Lethe.
AB: You know, I think it's good sometimes to be angry. Like, use that anger at a person you've broken up with. Sometimes women can get caught in a trap – I know I have – where you break up with someone and then you start to question whether it was the right decision...
RW: I've done that, and then I called a psychic to tell me it was the right decision.
AB: I think use the anger to fuel your own independence and get back out there.
RW: I always think if it's not right, who cares? So I never get upset or anything. Okay, you cry for a little bit, but then you're like, whatever, it wasn't meant to be.
AB: The best way is to get back out there and to spend time with your friends and start doing stuff that you like. You know what it's like to get into a relationship and suddenly you're just doing whatever the guy wants to do, so use your single time to do stuff you want to do.
LM: I was really bad at that, and so were you... I would just lay in bed and be depressed, eat a lot of ice cream, and then eventually it would pass. I don't think it's a good idea to pretend that it's not happening. Or to be fine with it, like the person who goes to the gym.
DJ: No, I'm the person that goes to bed.
What's the perfect night in when you're single and not ready to mingle?
Submitted by ravenbard.
RW: To me it involves ice cream.
AB: Oh yeah, definitely! I like to cook the perfect meal for one – like a healthy meal, but then you have a little wine, a little ice cream, watch a movie...
RW: Yeah. I DVR a lot of shows, and I like to watch my shows by myself so I'm not distracted, so I can watch it in peace.
AB: Ooh yeah, get stoned, watch five episodes of Orphan Black...
RW: I have to watch that!
AB: Oh my god, she's amazing, she plays all these different characters!
DJ: Movies and books and tea!
LM: Dirty sweats, big underwear... I really like big underwear. I do!
AB: I think that you know they're the one when everything's really easy. When you don't feel like you have to change anything about yourself, when you don't suddenly feel like your life is limited in some way. It shouldn't be a ton of work, it shouldn't be game-playing, it should just feel easy and light and nice.
RW: I haven't found the one yet, so I don't know whether I have any advice.
AB: Well, that's my advice.
RW: So the rule is...to be easy? Is that it?
AB: Yes! If it feels good, then it's good, and if it feels shitty, then it's bad. I think that's one thing that people really ignore – even though everything is harder in their lives, and they feel bad about themselves, they're trying to make it work... You should never feel that way.
LM: For me, there was a moment when I realised – like, it just hit me – and everything became really clear, and I knew that my husband was going to be the father of my children and I was going to marry him. So, I think you just know. Well, that's what happened with me anyway.
LM: Lots of sex with lots of different people.
AB: [shrugs] Homosexual sex. I'm just saying.
RW: I knew she was gonna say that.
AB: Or, if you're gay, heterosexual sex. Just go the other way!
RW: Just experiment. That's what your single days are for.