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1. A classic Swiffer that'll be super effective and, like a hand-written letter or broken-in denim jacket, timeless. I tbh don't know how to clean floors easily without it.
2. An ink remover that'll rescue hard surfaces and fabrics alike from the enemy to end all enemies — permanent marker.
3. A bottle of Finish booster powder to erase any hard water stains that have been plaguing your glasses. Simply add this in with your dishwasher soap for good-as-new dishes in a snap instead of just complaining like usual.
4. A pack of Bottle Bright tablets so you can rescue all the tumblers you've let sit for wayyy too long. They're salvageable! Just give 'em the old Bottle Bright treatment and they'll be back in service in no time.
5. A steam-cleaning mop that'll turbo-charge the mop portion of chore time. Fight me, but regular mopping feels like nothing. This steam mop will actually do something.
6. A necessary Clorox toilet-cleaning kit. Gone are the days of keeping an upsetting, bent toilet brush in your bathroom. This one's sleek design and replaceable heads makes this gross task far more manageable.
7. A powerful stain remover you can simply spritz and dab off on almost any stained fabric to get it back to like-new condition. Everything from your car upholstery to your favorite white button-up will be rejoicing.
8. A trusty pumice stone so you can gently scrape away hard water stains, calcium, lime, and any other difficult messes. Now you can move on from the time you accidentally sprayed silver paint directly into the sink.
9. A daily cleaner that you simply spray on the glass at the end of each shower. Without rinsing (!!!!), it will prevent soap scum and hard water buildup, meaning you have to heavy-duty clean far less often.
10. An extendable microfiber duster set so you can get into all those hard-to-reach places — starting from the top down, of course! The one unbendable rule of dusting.
11. A bottle of Barkeeper's Friend, a cleanser and polishing powder that will shine your old pots and pans right up! Now they'll totally be fit for those trendy open cabinets you've been eyeing.
12. A drain millipede so you can be the hero of your apartment and be the roommate who finally fixes that wildly inconvenient drain clog.
13. A cast-iron scrubber, because there are two simultaneous truths about cast irons: they are one of the best things for cooking and one of the worst things when it comes to cleaning. This chainmail tool will help you scrape off any leftover bits of food without removing that seasoning you've worked so hard to cultivate.
14. An automatic scrubbing brush so you can get *scrubbed-for-five-minutes-straight* results without the, uhhh, time and effort.
15. A TubShroom to stop drain clogs before they even begin. We love a proactive cleaner and we *extra* love not having to dig your roommate's hair out of the drain once a month.
16. A lightweight handheld vacuum for swiftly taking care of any little mess that comes up. This one goes out to every time I've spilled rice on the ground, stared at it wordlessly for 10 minutes, and then just...walked away.
17. A vinegar-based glass and window cleaner to achieve the streak-free shine you've dreamed about since you were a little kid.
18. Some Goo Gone that's a pretty great catch-all for any weird mystery mess you find. From removing price stickers to getting gum off of basically anything, GG has you covered.
19. A can of Easy-Off oven cleaner that will keep you from setting off your fire alarm due to burnt-on food literally every time you cook. It HAS to stop.
20. A pet hair vacuum because, although you love them, you haven't known peace since you got a pet that started shedding everywhere. This vacuum lifts the curse and is an absolute essential for pet owners.
21. A ceramic stovetop-cleaning kit that's like the "undo" button for cooktop errors. This high-maintenance appliance doesn't get the satisfaction of stressing you out anymore — you have the tools to counteract its difficult nature!
22. Microfiber cleaning cloths you can use to wipe down so many surfaces in your house and *yahoo* can be thrown right in the wash to use again.
23. A miraculous carpet stain remover to assuage all of your fears of irreversible food/drink/anything stains. No more living in fear of unfixable spills — relish in this weight being lifted off your shoulders.
24. A watermark-removing cloth that will help you refurbish anything from cherished family furniture to the new desk you just spent five grueling hours putting together then immediately set a celebratory sweating cocktail glass on.
25. A combination broom and squeegee to effortlessly remove hair from carpet, meaning old strands clinging to your feet constantly is a thing of the past.
26. A garbage disposal cleaning brush to oust the scary gunk hiding right under the rubber guard.
27. A rust stain–removing gel that will have you bidding goodbye to all of your rusted out bathroom fixtures, even if the color rust is tbh kind of chic.
"Your house is usually such a mess!"
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