1. Live-tweet while being frickin' operated on.
2. Clutch onto the feet of LEGENDS, much like a toddler, in front of thousands of people.
3. Have the most coveted and successful actress in India personally groom your moochi.
4. Take a creep-selfie with MICHAEL JORDAN.
5. Find your superstar girlfriend's movie name on a cab and stop to tweet about it.
6. Nap in a chartered airplane because your fabulous life is too exhausting.
7. Become friends with uncles you meet at the gym (and have every news outlet write about it).
8. Casually dress up as Govinda for an Instagram. Why not.
9. Get in bizarre bets with Hrithik Roshan...
10. AND INVEST IN ELABORATE COSTUMES AND WIGS TO WIN THEM.
11. Get a pappi on the head from Shah Rukh Frickin' Khan.
12. Make adorable-ass dubsmashes with your superstar girlfriend for the #1 fashion magazine in the world.
14. Snack on Nutella WHILE in an interview.
15. And show up to receive your "Man of the Year" award at GQ's Best Dressed in THIS shirt, with THESE pajamas, AND a fucking cane.
