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1.A build-on brick mug for anyone who's a child at heart (or just a literal child). Now you'll have something to do with your hands during your weekly phone call with your boss when he's droning on and on...and on.
2.A cruelty-free lengthening mascara, because who doesn't want to be this fabu~lash~? It's lightweight, won't transfer, doesn't smudge, and lasts all day — what more could you ask for?
3.A dishwasher cleaning tablets so you can skip the hard work of scrubbing away limescale and mineral buildup yourself. No more having to wash your dishes and plates again by hand because they're coated in mysterious white crusty bits.
4.An acne patch for those days when a pimple pops up at the *worst* possible moment. Hydrocolloid, tea tree oil, and calendula oil are gentle on the skin while still drawing out fluids and pus from your pimple.
5.A hair finishing stick that'll clean up all those random strands that escape from ponytails and buns. It's basically like a mascara wand coated in natural plant oils for your hair.
6.An itty bitty knife sharpener, because you know you haven't sharpened your knives since you bought them...five years ago. A dull knife is actually more dangerous because it requires more force to cut things, which increases the chances of it slipping — and there's nothing no more terrifying than slightly drunk you trying to slice limes for tequila shots with a dull knife.
7.A brush rack and cleaning mat with 28 different-sized holes to fit everything from your bulky powder brush to your teeny tiny eyeliner brush. Store them bristle-side up when you're using, and then turn them bristle-side down when they're drying. It even holds up nicely so you can take it with you when you travel!
8.A three-layer door stopper that'll block out the sounds of annoying roommates while also maintaining the temperature in your room. Installation is easy: simply cut the strip to size and attach it to your door using the built-in adhesive backing.
9.A detangling spray to make you forget about all the other times you cried in frustration and pain because unknotting your hair is no joke. This one's made with argan oil, jojoba protein, quinoa extract, and shea butter so your comb will glide through your hair effortlessly. Also, it smells divine!
10.Or, a conditioning leave-in detangler that'll dramatically reduce the number of times you ask yourself, "Should I just shave my head?" while brushing your hair. Your strands will be knot-free and smell ~amazing~.
11.A pair of super soft high-waisted leggings, because your body deserves this level of comfort. Wear them to the gym, dress them up with a blazer for work, dress them down with sneakers for a day of running errands, or use them as a warm layer under thicker pants during the winter. More than 6,000 people have given them a five-star review and say they're definitely opaque so you can live your best life without worrying about showing everyone your underwear.
12.A set of 16 sheet masks for pampering your skin. The best part: you can terrify your roommates because you'll look like Michael Myers while wearing one.
13.A Lodge cast-iron skillet that'll just get better the more you use it. Use it to sear steaks, brown veggies, or even bake a cake. It's basically indestructible so you can pass it on to your kids...and they can leave it to theirs.
14.A set of flexible curling rods so you don't have to spend three hours in the morning curling your hair. Use them on wet or dry hair and then sleep on them. The results: perfect heatless curls.
15.A pair of 14K gold-plated huggie earrings that'll move the party to your ears. They're nickel- and lead-free so you can rock them even if you have sensitive ears.
16.A Schick Silk dermaplaning razor so you can trim your brows — and conquer your PTSD from accidentally shaving off half your eyebrow in middle school thanks to its precision cover. These itty bitty razors are great for stashing in your purse for touch-ups on the go.
17.A pack of light-dimming stickers that'll stop bright alarm clocks and flashing electronics from distracting you from sleep.
18.A container of Burt's Bees body oil to lock in moisture as the weather dries out your skin. This lightweight oil is made with sweet almond oil, lemon oil, and vitamin E, so it not only smells good, but it also protects your skin from damaging free radicals.
19.A detergent cup caddy, because, wow, this thing is genius. No more drips and spills that sit on the top of your laundry machine that you're too lazy to wash off and then they collect dust and get gross and you know you need to wash them but who knew cleaning was so hard? (No, this isn't me! How could you think such a thing?)
20.A cuticle oil for prepping your nails for fall-colored manis. A combination of sweet almond oil, vitamin E, and jojoba softens the cuticle and strengthens your claws so you can wave goodbye to weak nails that peel.
21.A dishwasher-safe OXO avocado slicer for the person who's singlehandedly supporting the avocado market. This little green guy will last you through many, many avocado toasts.
22.A Coty setting powder that'll help regulate your skin's oil production so you can face — pun intended! — any weather conditions like a pro. This long-lasting loose powder also smooths the appearance of fine lines and blemishes (looking at you, adult acne).
23.A bottle of Mike's Hot Honey for anyone who enjoys the sweet and spicy side of life. Drizzle it on pizza, ice cream, waffles, wings, cheeseboards, and even in cocktails to create something un-bee-lievably delicious.
24.A Neutrogena clarifying shampoo to wash away hairsprays, dry shampoo, oils, and whatever residue is gunking up your scalp. This will make your mane so much easier to style. Clarifying shampoos can dry out your skin if you use them too often, so we recommend using it once a week.
25.A roll-on migraine stick that'll help soothe your mind-numbing headache with a mixture of peppermint, spearmint, lavender, and coconut oil.
26.A tub of Aztec Secret Indian Healing Clay for treating your scalp to a deep clean that'll break through buildup so everything you use after can really penetrate your scalp.
27.A jewelry-cleaning pen to make your jewels sparkle. It's compact enough to fit in your purse so you can use it on the go, yet it's powerful enough to clean days', months', and weeks' worth of dirt and grime that's dulled your stones' shine.
29.A bottle of OLLY sleep gummies to encourage your body to rest with their blend of L-Theanine, chamomile, and lemon balm — three ingredients that help boost relaxation and increase your sleep quality.
30.A scalp massager for transforming your shower into a five-star salon. A relaxing scalp massage is great for getting that blood flowing to your head while simultaneously breaking down buildup (hello hairspray and dry shampoo) that's making your hair oily and difficult to style. Starting with a clean slate can make working with your hair so much easier.
31.A baby cologne that'll become your signature fragrance. "It's this fabulous new scent called 'eau de bébé'" —you to all your friends.
32.A L'Oréal blowout primer to speed up the drying process while simultaneously protecting it from your heat-styling tools. It works with any and all hair textures, be they straight, curly, or something in between.
Realizing you can *actually* afford everything in this list: