I went through all 64 schools that made the real first round of the tournament (sorry, play-in game losers) and found their most embarrassing famous alum. They have been ranked from least embarrassing to most embarrassing.
64. Ole Miss: Eli Manning
63. Creighton: Anthony Tolliver
62. Florida Gulf Coast: The Bassist From A Band Called 7 Blue Skies
61. Western Kentucky: He Hate Me
60. Memphis: Fred Thompson
59. Belmont: DJ Qualls
58. Temple: Bob Saget
57. South Dakota State: Tom Daschle
56. St. Mary's: Mark Teahen
55. San Diego State: Mika Tan
54. Bucknell: Les Moonves
53. Oregon: Norv Turner
UNLV: Suge Knight (REMOVED FROM COMPETITION)
52. Iona: Jeff Ruland
51. La Salle: A.J. Daulerio
50. Louisville: Mitch McConnell
49. Gonzaga: Jason Bay
48. VCU: The Real Patch Adams
47. Akron: Charlie Frye
46. New Mexico: Hank Baskett
45. St. Louis: Larry Hughes
44. Miami: Ryan Braun
43. Oklahoma: Dick Armey
42. Colorado: Rick Reilly
41. James Madison: Tatanka
40. Florida: Tim Tebow
39. Valparaiso: The Red-Shirt Kid in "Crazy Frog Bros"
38. Wisconsin: Bud Selig
37. Pittsburgh: Harry K. Thaw
36. Arizona: Nicole Richie
35. N.C. State: Vinny Del Negro
34. Davidson: Patricia Cornwell
33. Kansas State: Michael Beasley
32. Pacific: Michael Olowokandi
31. Montana: Michael Ray Richardson
30. Georgetown: Michael Sweetney
29. Oklahoma State: Brandon Weeden
28. Indiana: Jared Fogle
27. Northwestern State: Darryl Willis
26. Minnesota: Rick Sanchez
He implied that Jews run the media and then lost his CNN job!
25. Cincinnati: Ruben Patterson
24. Villanova: Toby Keith
23. Michigan State: Former Bachelor Bob Guiney
22. Cal: Tom from MySpace
21. North Carolina: Mike Nifong
20. Kansas: Steve Doocy
19. Southern: Randy Jackson
18. Syracuse: Brad Anderson
17. Illinois: Gene Shalit
16. New Mexico State: Joe Pisarcik
Pisarcik's heartbreaking fumble is remembered bitterly by Giants fans and warmly by Eagles fans who call the play "The Miracle at the Meadowlands."
15. Notre Dame: Nicholas Sparks
14. Marquette: Matthew Lesko
13. Iowa State: Parviz Davoodi
12. Wichita State: "BTK" Serial Killer Dennis Rader
11. Harvard: Ted Kaczynski
10. Michigan: Ted Kaczynski
9. Albany: Accused "Craigslist Killer" Phillip Markoff
8. UCLA: "Dating Game Killer" Rodney Alcala
7. Butler: Jim Jones
6. UNLV: Guy Fieri
5. Missouri: SallyAnn Salsano
4. Duke: Tucker Max
3. Colorado State: Anwar al-Awlaki
2. North Carolina A&T: Khalid Sheikh Mohammed
1. Ohio State: Bruce Villanch
CORRECTION: An earlier version of this item misstated Colorado State's most embarrassing alum. The school's most embarrassing alum is Anwar al-Awlaki. The list has been re-ordered to reflect the change. (3/21/13)