There's been a shift in the culture. You would have felt it in the last year or so. After years of being dragged by boomers, millennials have a new foe: Gen Z.
when i say “im a gen z/millennial cusp” millennials are like “sure, i buy that,” but gen zs are like “no, you aren’t. go part your hair on the side and shove a harry potter wand up your ass you millennial freak.”
They're mocking us for our style and our obsessions and our misery. And you know what? A lot of the time, we deserve it. But we can't forget all the pain we suffered through in our childhoods and teen years that helped get the culture to where it is today.
Let's take a trip back through our collective struggles so that they weren't for nothing...
1. Wearing wide-leg jeans that weren't hemmed properly and ending up a filthy mess.
all these youths trying to cancel skinny jeans clearly never experienced this trauma
2. And trying to tuck them into your Uggs, which you wore in public and which also got all gross.
I got my #uggs wet to take a picture of that rainbow.
3. Having your butt crack and belly just constantly hanging over the top of your jeans.
The thought of wearing low rise jeans actually makes me want to vomit
4. Being sold the lie that clear bra straps were an effective solution for strapless tops.
remember when clear plastic bra straps were a thing and we all fully bought into it like "hahaha! the perfect crime!" what were we thinking lmao
5. Damaging our eyebrows for life.
The way I overplucked my eyebrows in 8th grade hurt God
6. Literally ironing our hair because there was no other way to straighten it.
sharon osbourne straightening ozzy osbourne’s hair with an iron, that’s the tweet
7. And using Sun In and lemon juice to try to lighten our hair in the sun.
we were talking about how gen z hates side parts in your hair (rude), and talking about bad hair trends do you remember Sun In? I remember BEGGING my mom to let me use it, sitting outside for hours with it in.....and my hair turning a lovely shade of orange
8. Dealing with dial-up internet and the many struggles that entailed...
ME: the internet used to come in through the phone. It made a terrible noise, like robots screaming. GRANDSON: hush grandpa take your pills
9. ...including everything going on in this tweet:
On this day 15 years ago my moms picked up the phone and interrupted a file at 96% I'd been downloading from Napster for 17 hours.
10. Spending 10 minutes typing random questions into Ask Jeeves and logging off because there was nothing else to do on the internet (that you knew of).
a while back i saw someone tweet about how if you type questions into google you’re old. so i went to ask jeeves dot com and typed “do old people type questions into google?”
11. Having to choose your fave 30 songs to put on your MP3 player if you wanted to travel with your music.
Me in 2000: Sweet a 64MB MP3 player I can listen to a few songs Me in 2008: Sweet a 30GB iPod I can listen to my entire music collection Me in 2016: Sweet a music subscription I have access to a massive swath of human recorded music but I'm only going to listen to a few songs
12. Learning to use social media and not quite knowing what to do with it, so you'd mostly post variations of "I'm bored."
one like and I’ll start tweeting the same way I used to post on Facebook 10 years ago
13. Publicly ranking (and being ranked by) your friend groups.
Honestly Tom was a sadistic person to think up a public Top 8 on MySpace. That shit caused A LOT of stress & drama
14. Taking (mostly terrible) photos with actual digital cameras.
Back in my day "selfies" were called "mirror pics". They were taken with real digital cameras and everyone looked like an idiot. #MySpace
15. And doing an extensive photo dump of every experience on Facebook (and having to go through and like all your friends' photo dumps).
do gen z know we used to upload 90 photos to a facebook album after every single night out? they’d be so mortified for us.
16. Actually spending the little money you had on annoying ringtones.
Man look at this Jamster ad in an old #GameInformer magazine! I kinda miss the old Game Informer
17. Having to go to the video store to rent what you wanted to watch, and then inevitably forgetting to return it on time and being charged.
The video rental wants another 6€ late fee for that movie I took with me from the holidays. "Let's Make Money" now cost me a total of 36€.
18. Recording your fave shows on VHS and living in constant fear that they'd be taped over.
Kids these days will never know the anger you felt when your sibling recorded over your VHS tape
19. Communicating entirely in stale Eddie Murphy and Austin Powers quotes...
when i was a teen we didn't have memes so everyone just spent all day quoting the same three movies and one (1) comedy special at each other
20. ...and very earnest, not very clever memes.
honestly we deserve to be dragged to hell by gen z for this
21. Finally, being told for decades that you were killing every industry and generally being terrible YOUTHS, only to suddenly discover that You Are the Old Ones Now.
love 2 be a millennial sitting on my giant hoard of cash, willfully refusing to buy: - diamonds - houses - department store things