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17 Real Examples Of Subtle Sexism That Made Me So Angry

I want to scream.

We asked the women of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us about a time they experienced subtle sexism, and there were hundreds of infuriating, heartbreaking, equally important responses. Here are 17 of the first ones women experienced outside the office.

1. "Almost always when we dine at a restaurant, the wine list and the check are handed to my boyfriend, even if I'm the one who requested them."

Fremulon / Via

2. "In my country, cars after a certain age have to be officially checked. The guys checking made me feel like an alien for driving my own car to the place. While they instructed the other drivers to do this or that, they would always stick their hands into my car instead of instructing me."

A woman screaming angrily
Home Box Office (HBO)

"To this day having my old car checked is the only thing I ask my boyfriend to do in my place."


3. "My parents, both people with doctorates, regularly get mail from banks, schools, and energy suppliers addressed to 'Dr. and Mrs. Smith.'

Deedle-Dee Productions / Via

"My mother has never given 'Mrs.' as her title to these people, having been Dr. Smith for decades. They just assume and keep doing it after corrected."


4. "I played on a co-ed soccer team, and a boy asked me, 'Do you even know what offsides is?,' as if I hadn’t also been playing soccer for years and wasn't on the same team as him."

A woman looking annoyed and shocked
Awesomeness Films / Via

"After I explained that I do, in fact, know a fundamental rule of soccer, he was like, 'Oh, fine,' and sulked away."


5. "Whenever I get my oil changed, the mechanics assume I know absolutely nothing about cars."

A woman looking frustrated
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures

6. "I booked an Airbnb a couple months in advance for my boyfriend and me. I was the one going back and forth with the host over messages. I arrived at the Airbnb a couple minutes prior to my boyfriend, and I was standing there with the host, who wasn't saying anything to me."

Broadway Video / Via

"Then, my boyfriend showed up and the host launched into the tour of the Airbnb and what we needed to know about it, addressing just him the entire time, despite the fact that I was the one who booked it."


7. "I was Snapchatting a guy and I said I was watching Game 1 of the NBA Finals, and he said, 'Why are you watching sports and I’m not?'"

A woman giving the finger
Gary Sanchez Productions

8. "My fiancé and I went to the grocery store and we picked up a pregnancy test. I have irregular periods, so it wasn't so much a pregnancy scare as it was to just make sure. We were checking out and the young male cashier turned to my fiancé and said, 'What are you hoping for?'"

Broadway Video / Via

"Excuse me??? First of all, why are you discussing the status of my uterus right in front of me, as if I'm not RIGHT THERE, but also, what a nosy question?????"


9. "Growing up, my brother could get out of doing the dishes for basically any reason with no consequences. The same did not apply to me."

A woman looking angry
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / Via

10. "The court clerk questioned my decision to retain my last name when we picked up our marriage license."

Comedy Partners / Via

"She said, 'You're not changing your last name? You don't want to change it ever? Not even 50 years down the road? Never, ever? Okay, I just want you to be aware that you can never change it if you don't do it now.' Number one, how dare you? Numbers two and three, this is not advice a court clerk should be giving, and the advice is not even legally sound."


11. "I’m really into motorcycles, but for some reason this seems to baffle guys my age. They just stare at me like, 'You know the specs of a Ducati? No way!'"

A woman giving two thumbs down

12. "My then-boyfriend and I were talking with a male clerk at a video store and the Evil Dead franchise came up. I love that franchise, but my boyfriend had never seen it. The clerk only talked to him about it, and, rather than just admit he didn’t know what he was talking about, my boyfriend went along with it, even when I said he’d never seen the movies but I love them."

A woman looking angry

"The clerk continued to act like I wasn’t there and had a one-sided conversation with a guy who didn’t even know what he was talking about."


13. "One of my school coaches made the boys run, like, four extra laps, while the girls could 'sit down and relax.' I’m not an athletic person at all, but I was pissed."

IAC Films / Via

14. "When buying my first car at 22, I brought my parents to help me look. The salesperson was a middle-aged man, and only addressed my parents (specifically my father) when asking about what we were looking for."

A woman looking annoyed at the camera
Deedle-Dee Productions

"He made comments to them about buying 'their princess' whatever she wanted. As a young woman who was buying the car on her own, without a co-signer, I was annoyed to say the least. I left that dealership fairly quickly."


15. "Years ago, I was renting a moving truck with a tow dolly for my car. The employee renting it to me said they would not let me leave until I came back with a man to lock up my car on the tow dolly because a woman didn't have enough muscle to do it herself."

British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) / Via

"Furious, I parked my car and locked it on (not the first time I had done this) and told him to check the ratchet strap for me. He couldn't get it any tighter so I jumped in and drove off."


16. "I was playing soccer in a co-ed group. In the camp where we would play, there was a rule that spectators could not enter and watch. I was entering the gate when the guard stopped me..."

A woman looking angry
Monkeypaw Productions

"...And told me that he was going to allow me to watch the game JUST this particular instance, assuming I was a girlfriend of one of the guys and not an actual athlete who played."


17. And "I was asked not to wear white too often, because white should be reserved for my wedding day only."

CBS / Via

Note: Submissions have been edited for length and clarity.

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