26 Fucking Batshit Things That Happened In Scotland In 2016

Stolen toilets, huge cocks, furious deer…oh, Scotland. What on Earth would we do without you?

1. A takeaway invented a Scotch pie and beans pizza.

*Wipes away patriotic tear*

2. And this pizza place tried to recycle dough.


3. An entire cash machine was stolen at T in the Park.

From the middle of a busy festival site. In full view of police. Impressive.

4. And of course people took the piss.


5. This guy was spotted using a tent peg as a piercing.


6. And this teenager ran out of suncream and had to improvise.

T in the Park, we’ll miss you.

7. These happy-go-lucky police officers decided to have fun on a rope swing in Aberdeen.

It’s OK though, as there’s definitely no crime in Aberdeen.

8. This Paisley charity shop got a bit of a surprise.

Guess the Fifty Shades craze is finally over. Well, in Paisley anyway.

9. And so did Pablo in Glasgow.


10. Over in Fife, someone was flogging a real bargain.

“I’ll take two, please.”

11. Someone came up with an interesting new transport method in Glenrothes.

12. Maybe she was taking her injured pal to see this?

Fifers don’t need Disney World, they have novelty topiary.

13. Meanwhile, in Inverness…

What the hell kind of bingo are the OAPs of Inverness playing?

14. Trump visited Scotland in June, and got hilariously, inventively, and weirdly trolled.

15. And, you know, just generally told to fuck off.

16. This guy didn’t give a single fuck about terrorism.

“Aye this will make such a good profile pic if I don’t die lol.”

17. Whereas this poor sod had the opposite experience.

Well….that escalated quickly.

18. These Dundee sun-worshippers risked death to catch a few rays.

To be fair, it is only sunny for about half an hour once a year in Scotland. You’ve got to make the most of it.

19. And in Glasgow, people sunned themselves literally anywhere.


The sound of the M8 is so soothing on a summer’s day.

20. Someone nicked this guy’s shower and toilet.



21. A dog walker captured this majestic scene.

It’s like a scene from Planet Earth II. If Planet Earth II was about neds.

22. This shopper got a truly amazing free gift.

Mmm, delicious!

23. And this Glaswegian postie needed a bit of extra energy to finish his shift.

Even though you’re not allowed to drink on Glasgow buses. Or at work. Or in uniform. But hey!

24. It’s OK though, because the bus driver was a bit distracted.

Shame there’s no filter that erases terrible life decisions.

25. This lengthy diversion popped up on Jura.

Urgh, how inconvenient.

26. And finally, this weird looking, pissed-off stag summed up how everyone felt about 2016.

He’s probably waiting for Trump to come back so he can hoof him in the baws.

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Hilary Mitchell is the Scotland editor for BuzzFeed and is based in Edinburgh.
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