back to top

A Full ATM Was Stolen From T In The Park And People Can't Stop Taking The Piss

"I'm tied up in a tent somewhere near Strathallan in Perthshire."

Posted on

At some point between midnight and 7am on Friday, thieves stole a cash machine from the main arena area at T in the Park, Scotland's largest music festival.

A cash machine has been STOLEN here at #TinthePark.

According to Police Scotland, the machine contained a "significant" amount of cash, and they're currently appealing for witnesses to come forward. Around 80,000 people attended this year's three-day event.


There were plenty of gags about the ATM company's unfortunate "cash on the move" tagline as well.

When the cash machines are called Cash On The Move at #TITP and then one gets stolen 😂😂😂

A Glasgow band called Colonel Mustard and The Dijon 5 made a replica and brought it on stage.

Glad to see the @TInTheParkATM alive and well performing with @colonel5mustard at @Tinthepark #mustarddressenvy


Even celebrities couldn't resist poking fun.

Imagine waking up in your tent with an ATM machine😱😱😱

And the Scottish Twitter commentators were out in force too.

How the fuck can ye walk oot t in the park wae a cash machine without somecunt batting their jawbone? Even dynamo canny dae that

Loads of people wondered how the hell the thieves had managed to pull off the heist.

At a Scottish music festival someone dragged off a full CASH MACHINE @Tinthepark they search ur bag for drugs but a CASH MACHINE? How??


How do you steal an entire cash machine without anybody noticing? #TInThePark

How a couldnt get into T with a can of deodorant but somebody could leave way a cash machine a will never know

And a handful of people suggested that whoever managed to steal it deserved to keep the cash.

How the HECK did someone manage to steal an ATM at T without getting caught ?????? They deserve that dolla purely for the exceptional effort

See Whoever can steal a full scale massive cash machine from the main arena at T without being seen? They deserve every bit a money in it

An attitude that almost definitely isn't shared by the police, T in the Park's organisers, or the cash machine company.

Wherever you are, T in the Park ATM, good luck and god speed.

Twitter: @TInTheParkATM

Seriously though, if you did spot anything suspicious – for example, an entire ATM being carried through a muddy campsite – call Police Scotland on 101.