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29 Times Rebel Wilson Was Really Fucking Funny On Twitter

"Hey boobs, don't sweat it!"

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1. When she gave actually motivational reasons to exercise:

I'm always stretching...just in case I'm needed for the Olympics...or a local dance battle x

2. When she summed up the only reason you leave the house on the weekend:

I hate when there's nothing to watch on TV...it makes me wanna get up and do something productive...

3. When she summed up how you feel when Netflix won't stop buffering:

When the cable TV stops working, so does my niceness x

4. When she just put everything into perspective:

I just found out I'm allergic to dogs and cats..thank god not unicorns or koalas...

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5. When she summed up what every woman wants to say to her boobs:

6. When she showed you you aren't alone:

Just so we're all clear: I didn't get out of pajamas all day today…BUT I did walk to the fridge eight times x

7. When she finally spoke out about how much of a workout blow drying is:

Who can train for a marathon? I'm currently training to be able to blow dry AND straighten my own hair without having to take a break x

8. When she told the world her greatest fear:

The scariest thing at 4am in the morning is: the fitted sheet on your bed coming off one corner and hitting you smack in the face!

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9. When she acknowledged all achievements, big and small:

Only burnt 1 tit with our illegal fireworks display x

10. When she never missed an opportunity for a pun:

11. When she managed the impossible:

I don't know how, but I just strained my thumb eating an ice cream sandwich x

12. When she said what we were all thinking when we watch those programs:

Is it weird that I wanna go on SURVIVOR just as an experiment to see how much weight I would lose without access to Ben & Jerry's??

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13. When she asked Justin Bieber out in the best way possible:

Note to all girls: if you get a date confirmation in writing it's a legal document & that promise must be fulfilled

No, really.

@RebelWilson @KellyOsbourne and thanks for the note

14. When she set realistic goals for herself:

Things I've already achieved in 2016: not washing my hair for a week #skills

15. When she rightly said that she should totally be in the Victoria's Secret fashion show:

OMG can't wait to see me in the Victoria's Secret Fashion show tonight...WAIT...I'm not in it??? Whaaaat? But I'm a total ANGEL!!!!!!

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16. When she showed you that you don't need a spoon:

I'm eating straight cream using my finger as a spoon...I think I've reached a new jet lag low X

17. When she claimed to have totally made out with Harry Styles:

Check us on ELLEN tomorrow...does this mean T Swift & I are now officially "spit sisters" X

18. When she failed in ways you didn't even know were possible, and still made it work:

At least once a week I walk out the door with a piece of clothing on inside-out. Today it was the bra x

19. When she had all her priorities in the right order:

I totally slutted it up for my new passport photo x

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20. When she finally spoke out about the hardest part of going to work:

I really do put my health on the line for comedy! I had to wear the bra all day x

21. When she summed up humanity:

If you want to turn feral, it's easy, just spend more than 5 minutes at a water park in Summer x

22. When she didn't miss out on an opportunity to be a businesswoman:

I feel like Burger King should make me their new spokesperson X

23. When she spoke out about this very real fear we've all had:

Just had that terrible feeling when you wake up to see a lip pimple but for a second think, "oh no, how did I get Herpes?" #lipzitlucky

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24. When she knew what she wanted:

I saw a sign that just said NUTELLA with an arrow. So I followed it.

25. When she cared about the little things:

I don't put body lotion on until after I've weighed myself coz I feel like that could make a huge difference...

26. When she wrote the perfect internet dating profile:

If I had an internet dating profile it'd probably say: LIKES: Lasagna, Theme Parks, Movies DISLIKES: Sweat mustaches...WAIT internet dating

27. When she even got undressed like a BOSS:

I never bend down to take off my underwear. I do this little kick-ball-change move to flick the undies up & then I catch them like a BOSS!

28. When she made sure her clothing line had something for everyone:

Yep, I'm bringing out a clothing line in November! #RebelforTorrid & if you're too skinny for it, you can buy the bag

29. When she was just like us:

I'm not too famous to eat crumbs off my chest x