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1. An encouraging little book filled with affirmations and pep talks to help remind you of just how awesome you are!
2. A pack of collagen-infused eye masks so you can combat your lack-of-sleep look and any other general under-eye puffiness.
3. A set of lace trimmed cotton undies, because new year — new underwear!
4. A coloring book filled with 37 of the most notorious serial killers the world has ever known...and you get to bring them to life with your mad coloring skills.
5. A cozy sweatshirt for anyone who would rather taste the meat and not the heat.
6. A 24k-gold-surface face massager designed to gently vibrate and promote blood circulation, said to activate your skin cells' metabolism, restoring skin firmness and elasticity, and to help prevent fine lines.
8. A motherf#@%in' waffle bowl maker. Ice cream sundaes? More like ice cream fundaes with this bad boy!
9. A growth-promoting lash serum you apply like you would your favorite mascara to get help reduce fallout and promote thickness and length of your eyelashes.
10. A stainless steel and silicone base grater prep bowl complete with everything to grate up to 5 quarts of cheese — except the cheese, of course.
11. A delightful five-year journal that has you answer one question every day of the year and come back to the same questions on the same day for five years.
12. A cushioned foam acupressure mat and pillow set, because it's literally impossible to function at your full potential when you're suffering from neck and back pain.
13. A delightful pleated fit-and-flare midi dress to take you from office-appropriate to dinner date with just the change of a shoe.
14. An inspiring vinyl wall decal that'll be your daily reminder to leave your house and kick some serious ass.
15. A set of Golden Girls shot glasses — the perfect way to thank anyone for being a friend.
16. A comfy and totally cozy turtleneck midi dress easily worn alone or layered up...it's a chic AF number you'll throw on in a million ways.
17. A copy of Becoming by Michelle Obama — it provides an inspiring look into the former FLOTUS's life and the journey she took into becoming the icon so many see her as today.
18. A portable Bluetooth speaker designed with a hands-free function, built-in mic, and enhanced bass.
19. A set of RFID-blocking passport and credit card sleeves for a simple and effective way to help prevent identity theft.
20. An elegant tulle midi skirt designed with an elastic waist, A-line cut, and flowing lining to help make it the comfiest and most *practical* skirt you'll own.
21. A cool-mist essential oil diffuser and seven-color LED light everyone will be pin(eapple)ing over.
22. A compact eyelash curler designed with open sides so that it leaves you with perfectly curled lashes that last all day long — and it won't ever pinch your eyelids.
23. A colorful sequined pencil skirt you'll be able to wear through the new year.
24. A monthly subscription to some awesome K-beauty face masks — it's like having glowing skin delivered right to your door!
25. A fantastic pop-up book that transforms into a real working planetarium projecting the constellations, a musical instrument complete with strings for strumming, a geometric drawing generator, an infinite calendar, a message decoder, and a speaker that amplifies sound.
26. A sparkling set of gorgeous hair pins, because sometimes your updo just wants to have fun.
27. A three-speed, eight-feature, deep-kneading Shiatsu massager perfect for your back, neck, legs, feet, head, and shoulders, knees, and toes...knees and toes.
28. A pair of vintage-inspired tassel earrings that'll look like a million bucks but are actually less than $5.
29. A freakin' Marauder's Map guide to Hogwarts complete with a magical freakin' wand!
30. A comfy, stretchy T-shirt that tells it like it is.
31. An adorable little eye mask filled with a removable ice bag — you're about to be relaxing like a koala in a eucalyptus tree.
32. And a totally nostalgic makeup pin — you either get this and are totally laughing right now or you don't.
I don't wanna hear that you don't like anything on this list!
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