My grandfather and his best friend were stealing a couch from someone’s apartment. As they made their getaway, both carrying one end, my grandfather stopped to talk to a beautiful girl he saw sitting on a stoop next door. He asked her out and then had to run because the owner of the…Â
Well after the government takes out taxes, I’ll pay off my student loans and buy a house because I’m a Millennial and that’s all we dream about...or I’d just spend it all on avocado toast. It’s up in the air.
Let me just start out by saying that I went to a Catholic high school. Apparently, freshman religion class was the appropriate time to have the safe sex talk. Sister Mary Prozac (I don't remember her real name, but that's what everyone called her) started the discussion off by encouraging…Â
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