Lexi Howard, Please Consider These Titles For Your Play

Standby Pee, Tokelahoma!, Euphoria: The Ruesical. There's gotta be a winner somewhere on this list.

Eddy Chen/HBO

When vice principal Garcia greenlit Lexi Howard’s play proposal sight unseen, it was hard to know whether to clock this as a win for Euphoria's burgeoning girl boss or laugh at the administrative incompetence on display. Now, six episodes into Season 2, it seems we've finally gotten something resembling a logline: "It's about a group of girlfriends who sort of grow up and grow apart," Lexi tells Fezco.

Does this mean we will be getting a modern day Stand By Me? A yassified My Brilliant Friend? A "Merrily We Roll Along" about a different kind of "rolling"? Your guess is as good as ours. We ran with these crumbs and came up with a handful of utterly winning titles that our favorite level-headed sidekick won't be able to refuse for her splashy theatrical debut. 

Euphoria spoilers and bad puns ahead.

1. Tokelahoma!

It's not, like, a play you read. 

2. This Is 17

Judd Apatow produces. 

3. Standby Pee

A poignant metaphor for Lexi's topsy-turvy friendship with Rue. (And she did say the play was just like Stand By Me!)

4. Bitch, You Better Be Joking

We're not! It has legs. 

5. Synecdoche; Rue York

The solipsistic meta-text Lexi deserves. 

Eddy Chen / HBO

6. Peen of Admissions

A plot: Euphoria seniors struggling to get into college. B plot: Cal Jacobs admitting to his secret life while his member hangs out of pants.

7. This Is Our Rueth

Starring Tavi Gevinson as a Euphoria High teacher. 

8. Merrily We "Roll" Along

Ya snooze, ya lose, Linklater.

9. The Joy of Panting

An ode to Lexi's favorite painter-turned-TV personality — as well as bathroom sex.

10. It's 4 A.M., I Must Be Lonely

Starring Cassie's bath robe, under-eye patches, and Rob Thomas?

Eddy Chen / HBO

11. Euphoria: The Ruesical

McKay vanishes in the second act.

12. "High" School Musical

This is the start of something new. It feels so right with a neon hue! 

13. Too Little, Too Nate

But he knows all the right things to say.

14. Sisterhood of the Traveling Two-Piece Set

Bitch, you’re my soulmate!

15. David Byrne's American Ruetopia

I feel numb, born with a weak heart. Guess I must be having fun!

Eddy Chen / HBO

16. Ruene

It has a seven-minute run time. :(

17. Dick, Dick... Boom!

Lin-Manuel Miranda isn't the only one making his directorial debut with this source material.

18. Bye Bye ShyGuy

Guess Maddy will always ca-a-a-a-are!

19. Nateline

Remember Tyler from Season 1? Lexi investigates.

20. Full Frontal Rue-dity

A celebration of male nudity in the Euphoria CU.

Eddy Chen / HBO

21. Love Trumps Nate

Lock him up!

22. Rue Paul's Drug Race

If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?

23. Ruetiful: The Carole King Musical

"We gotta get out of this place," Rue croons to Jules. 

24. Kats

Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson play romantically entangled Jellicles. 

25. First Rueformed

Pepto Bismol and whiskey provided as refreshments. 

Eddy Chen / HBO

26. Waiting for Fezco

A slightly more literal spin on the Beckett classic.

27. 17 Going on 27

A meta-commentary on Dear Evan Hansen and Euphoria casting.

28. Those Who Leave and Those Who Slay

The quintessential "growing up and growing apart" story, but yassified.

29. Girls Trip

Lexi gets sued for copyright infringement. 

30. Richard Jules

Literally no connection to the plot. Just havin a good time. 

Stream Euphoria now for $9.99 (with ads) or $14.99 (ad-free). Not so sure about a big commitment to a new streaming service? You can try out HBO Max free for one week (for new subscribers only).

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