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Posted on Jul 10, 2017

Important Debate: Will Smith In “Hitch" Or Ryan Gosling In “Crazy, Stupid, Love”?

Two great rom-coms, but there can only be one winner.

Hitch and Crazy, Stupid, Love have a lot in common. No, it's not just that they seem to be playing on TBS all the time — it's that they're both movies in which a smooth guy takes a not smooth guy under his wing and teaches him how to be better at interacting with women.

Sony Pictures / Warner Bros. Pictures

Because of their parallels, people have compared Alex Hitchens (Will Smith) and Jacob Palmer (Ryan Gosling).

Sony Pictures / Warner Bros. Pictures

Both are charismatic, smooth-talking fellas who do well with the ladies, but the grand question we need an answer to is: WHO HAD BETTER GAME: Hitch or Jacob? Before you answer that, let’s consider some important variables.

Which one made a better first impression on their love interest?

Sony Pictures / Warner Bros. Pictures

Hitch first met Sara Melas (Eva Mendes) by saving her from some annoying guy who was hitting on her. Then they had a fun little convo before he smoothly exited. As you can see in the photo, Sara was extremely intrigued as Hitch walked away,

When Jacob first met Hannah, he interrupted a conversation she was having with her friend. Then he aggressively hit on her until she literally got up and left the bar to get away from him. That's not smooth.

Hitch 1, Jacob 0.

Which one was less creepy when pursuing their romantic interest?

Sony Pictures / Warner Bros. Pictures

MY MAN HITCH GOOGLED A WOMAN, FOUND OUT WHERE SHE WORKED, HAD A MESSENGER DELIVER A WALKIE-TALKIE TO HER SO THEY COULD COMMUNICATE, THEN ASKED HER OUT. Sure, that's a little creepy, but it's so bold that I respect it.

As for Jacob, here are three creepy things he did in his brief pursuit of Hannah:

1. He called Hannah "sexy" seconds after meeting her.

2. He told Hannah they should hook up and said she wouldn't regret it.

3. He claimed to be a "tomcat in the sack," which is definitely the least cool way to say you're good at sex.

Both men did creepy things in the hopes of getting a woman's attention, but at least Hitch was creatively creepy.

Hitch 2, Jacob 0.

Which one got more results for the person they were guiding?

Sony Pictures / Warner Bros. Pictures

Albert (Kevin James) wanted help pursuing the woman of his dreams, Allegra Cole (Amber Valletta). Not only did he help him get dates, but Albert wound up marrying Allegra under Hitch's wing — that's results.

Cal (Steve Carell) wanted to hook up with strangers so he could get over his wife after she asked for a divorce. He had sex with NINE different people under Jacob's tutelage — that's results too.

One wife. Nine hookups. Both Jacob and Hitch deserve a point for getting results.

Hitch 3, Jacob 1.

IN CONCLUSION: Jacob and Hitch both had elite game, but Jacob was more of a pickup artist focused on seduction and getting laid, while Hitch strived to create romance and relationships.

Sony Pictures

In one scene, Hitch refuses to do business with a dude who is only interested in sex. He says, "Hit it and quit it is not my thing," even though he could help with hookups if he wanted to. This proves that Hitch's game is more versatile than Jacob's. Hitch could get a person their life partner or a one-night stand, whereas Jacob is only capable of the latter. Therefor my vote goes to the legend, Alex "Hitch" Hitchens. But that's just my 2 cents — what do YOU think?

  1. WHO HAD BETTER GAME: WILL SMITH IN HITCH OR RYAN GOSLING IN CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE?

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WHO HAD BETTER GAME: WILL SMITH IN HITCH OR RYAN GOSLING IN CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE?
  1.  
    vote votes
    Hitch
  2.  
    vote votes
    Jacob

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