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1. A classic KitchenAid standing mixer for mixing up cakes, meringues, cookies, whipped potatoes, and anything else you like to serve with a side of kitchen appliance advice.
2. A door handle pouch to hang on your front door, so it's almost impossible to leave without your keys/checks/doggy bags/head.
3. An intriguing mushroom coffee that's so fun-ghi to drink you'll want everyone try it.
4. A pair of pull cords so you can immediately tell which cord turns on the light and which turns on the fan. You know everyone is gonna be a huge fan of this!
5. A strategic card game called Unstable Unicorns that's all about building your own unicorn army before your friends, so you can crush them under your golden hoof. You'll want to play with your friends all the time, assuming you still have them after the first game.
6. An electric wine opener to make popping bottles so easy, you won't let anyone else suffer through the old-fashioned way ever again.
7. A bottle of Mike's Hot Honey that tastes good on everything, meaning you'll want to start encouraging your friends to have it on hand when you come over for dinner.
8. A desk pedaler to help you keep circulation going in your legs without the pain of a standing desk. You might not even have to recommend it — your co-workers will see it and buy their own immediately.
9. A seven-in-one Instant Pot that will pretty much cook dinner for you, freeing up plenty of time to talk about it to your friends.
10. Billie, a razor subscription company that solves a ton of razor-related problems: it's inexpensive, it's cute, it's gentle on skin, and it comes right to your door!
11. A super-effective, natural stainer remover that's so effective, it'll be like you never spilled that ice coffee at all. Until you spill the beans and tell everyone about how great this stuff works.
12. An easy-to-use wireless speaker so good, even the bands you play on it will be singing the gadget's praises.
13. A magnetic screen door that lets you (or your guests, children, or pets) run in and out of the house, hands-free.
14. A spiral-bound book of New York Times Monday crossword puzzles so you can take a break from screens and give your brain a little work-out (until you grab your phone and start tweeting about how great crossword books are).
15. A "nice" cream maker that transforms frozen fruit into delectable soft serve. You won't be able to stop 'gramming your fruity sundaes.
16. A roll-on migraine relief stick you can roll on whenever you feel a headache coming.
17. A bottle of squalane oil that will deliver an instant hit of hydration to pretty much anywhere on your body.
18. Peel and stick fake marble for when you have fancy taste but not a fancy budget.
19. A zombie face mask kit that'll bring your skin back to life, in a good, not scary way.
20. A tube of Lucas Pawpaw lip balm so effectively moisturizing, you'll be doing lip service for it from here on out.
21. A seat gap filler to keep all your knick-knacks and debris from falling into your car's black hole, never to be seen again.
22. A grout pen that will make your tile floors look so brand spanking new, you won't be able to stop asking people to admire your floors.
23. A variety pack of Banza, aka chickpea pasta that's such an effective pasta alternative that you may never return to the original.
24. A clay mask that fights break-outs and calms irritated skin — the results speak for themselves.
25. A reliable hand vacuum you'll end up lending out to everyone who made the mistake of investing in a less sturdy model.
26. A pack of silicone straws so you can keep sipping on your bevvies but without harming any sea turtles in the process. Expect a thank you note from Mother Nature in the mail.
27. An external charger, because you don't want to end up asking the bartender to charge your phone and then be without your precious screen for god knows how long. Nightmare averted.
28. A blessedly effective carpet cleaner capable of turning your brown carpet into whatever color it was when you bought it.
29. And a lavender memory foam mattress topper that will give you such great sleep, you'll be talking about it to people in your dreams.
Me, trying to relax, but plagued with the idea of people not knowing about all of the quality stuff they could buy.
Looking for more great Amazon finds? Check out some of our favorite cheap things to buy on Amazon, some of the weirdest things on Amazon you might actually want, or read through all the rest of our incredible Amazon product recommendations.
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