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This Clay Mask Basically Vacuums Out Your Pores, And BRB I'm Going To Bathe In It

I need this in my life, stat.

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Let's be real: The only thing you probably have in common with Regina George is large pores (and a love of cheese fries).

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And while Regina does have basically everything, I bet she doesn't have the Aztec Secret Indian Healing Clay, the pore-minimizing and -clearing mask that's practically spawned its own cult.

And when you consider that some cults are just two dudes and an aging cat, the healing clay is an actual JUGGERNAUT! It has more than 11,500 reviews on Amazon, 71% of which are five-star reviews.

Oh, and it's only $8.30 for a 1-pound jar. I'll give you a moment to collect yourself.

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ANYWAY, you're probably wondering what makes this face mask so much better than the 54398792340 other ones out there. For starters, it makes your face pulsate. PULSATE!!!*

*That is, it will if you follow the very specific instructions printed on the label. There is some mixing and adding of apple cider vinegar required on the part of the user, but that's a small ask from the self-proclaimed world's most powerful facial.

It also acts as one of the most potent pore cleaners out there. I'm not kidding. A satisfied customer shared a very convincing photo of what the clay pulled out of their skin. If you're not into that kind of thing, take my word for it, but if you are, enjoy:

Hakunamytatas / Amazon User /

But what's really making people come back for more is the amazing effect it has on acne. The before-and-afters are making my heart sing and my eyes tear up with joy.

Heather E. / Amazon User /

"Wow. Just wow. I had no expectations for this product since I've been dealing with cystic acne since I was a teenager (I'm 24 now), so I went into this purchase not expecting much. I have very sensitive, reactive skin and have never seen any real improvement. After reading all the crazy reviews about this product I figured I would give it a try, again, not expecting much. However, I have been blown away by the long-term results of using this mask. I mix it with apple cider vinegar and apply it several times a week when my skin is really bad, and it has never done anything negative to my skin – no irritation, no dryness, nothing. It always destroys every single pimple that emerges. It does bring underlying pimples to a head, and that can be a little disturbing at first, but it is so worth it for the end result. I was considering taking Accutane, a very strong and dangerous medicine, to finally cure my acne for good, and this product has made me completely reconsider." —Heather E.

I mean, it only took four days — four!!! — for this customer to see a noticeable improvement in her complexion.

DJ Freddie W. / Amazon User /

"This will forever be a staple for me. I went through a horrible breakout and decided to use this. In six days, my skin was significantly clearer. I leave it on for about 35-45 minutes then rinse off with warm water. This is definitely worth the investment. An all natural skin clarifier and acne zapper — what could be better? The thing is, you have to keep with it, doesn't work with one or two uses. Be patient and drink lots of water as well. Hubby uses it also and we both will be supporters for life!" —DJ Freddie W.

Okay, fine, here's one more because this is honestly making me believe in miracles.

Amazon Customer /

"I'm 24 and this past January my face started breaking out with cystic acne. Naturally I immediately went to the dermatologist, and then my acne got even worse (I wanted to treat acne on my chin but then it started spreading to my forehead after using the prescription topical creams they gave me). In desperation I started looking up other treatments and came across Aztec healing clay. I stopped using all the topical stuff given to me from the dermatologist and used the hearing clay every other day (started once a week then upped it to every other day). In my picture you'll see picture to the left which was taken in February and the picture on right taken yesterday. I strongly recommend Aztec healing clay, it has done more wonders than I could've ever imagined (and you can't beat the price!!!)." —Amazon Customer

Whether you have acne, blackheads, or just want some deep ~cleansing~, you probably owe it to yourself to give this tub of dreams a try, mmkay?

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Get the Aztec Healing Clay Mask from Amazon for $8.30.

Amazon reviews have been edited for length and clarity.

Bonus: You can also use it to make your natural deodorant work better!