We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community "What's Something Ridiculous You Believed To Be True About Sex When You Were Younger?" and, WHEW BUDDY, they did not disappoint. Here are some of the ~most misinformed~ responses:
1."I thought ALL sex was illegal. I remember thinking, 'Why anybody would ever have a baby? That's evidence they committed a crime!'"
2."When I was younger I didn’t know that sex was used for pleasure in any way. I believed that the ONLY reason anybody had sex would be to be have a child."
3."I thought you’d have to call your parents on your wedding night to learn how sex worked. I pictured sitting down with paper and a pencil in my wedding dress to take all the notes."
5."When I was about nine years old, I believed that you could get pregnant if you ate or drank from the same thing as a stranger. We had some men redoing our pool deck and one of them kept a water bottle in our fridge. I didn’t know it wasn't ours, so I drank it and, once I found out, I was CONVINCED I was pregnant."
7."I didn’t realize you thrusted or moved AT ALL during sex. I took the explanation from Sex Ed. literally— a man puts his penis into a woman’s vagina and that's the only way to have sex."
8."I remember being told that, in order for a child to be conceived, it involved sperm from a man and an egg from a woman, but I couldn’t figure out how they came together. I was convinced that people used some sort of tube that suctioned itself to the woman’s vagina."
9."I thought that, when you had sex, you automatically got pregnant. Since I have two siblings, I assumed my mom only had sex three times in her life."
10."I thought that if you WERE NOT on birth control and had sex, you would KEEP having a baby every nine months until you started taking birth control."
11."I thought 'condoms' referred to pills a man inserted into the head of his penis. I was maybe 14 when I found out that’s not what the 'little blue pill' is."
13."I don’t even know where I got this from, but for some reason I thought 'sex' meant that two people would lay on top of each other and literally just rub their bodies together."
14."I didn’t know the vagina had a hole that led to the cervix and womb. Frankly, I didn’t even know where pee came out on women. So I thought the penis literally just slid in and out of the labia like a credit card."
15."I had no idea sex even involved penises or vaginas. I thought people just passionately made out naked until they got bored and moved on with their day."
16."I thought that the way a person had a baby was that they'd go to hospital, the doctor would prick her stomach, the skin would explode open revealing the baby, and then they'd sew the mom back up."
17."I thought 'fertility pills' were what GOT you pregnant. In second grade, my friend’s mom got pregnant and she said something like, “Ew, that means my parents had sex!” And I confidently assured her that no, her mom just took a fertility pill."
19."My mother told me where babies came from when I was like in second grade, but she did it so clinically, focusing on the medical part, that I DEADASS thought for years you had to go to the doctor's office to have sex."
24."I thought the word 'sex' was an insult as a kid, so I would often tell my little sister to 'go have sex.' I thought it was like saying, 'Fuck off!'"