I went through a time where I was in the exact same position. Not against the idea of being trans, just not fully understanding. I then stumbled upon a giant trove of vlogs on YouTube of trans men and women who were documenting their transitions on a weekly basis. They discussed all the emotional ups and downs, relationships with family, friends, strangers, physical changes (which you can see happening from week to week, which is wild!) etc. It was an eye-opening experience to say the least.
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