CNN’s 24 Hours Of Poop Ship
Relive the first major “breaking news” event to be covered by Jeff Zucker’s dynamic new CNN with its amazing chyrons.
Almost over? Not if CNN has anything to say about it!
Feb. 14, 2013, will go down in history as the first day Jeff Zucker’s dynamic new CNN really covered a breaking news story, like a sewage-soaked Carnival cruise blanket. Let’s take a look at how much broadcast time CNN dedicated to what will be remembered by many as Jeff Zucker’s Gulf War.
At 5 a.m., it began.
5 a.m. – 4 p.m. = 11 hours. 11 hours = 660 mins. That’s 37% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship coverage.
The “Situation Room,” CNN’s premiere political show, dives in at 4 p.m.
4 p.m. – 7 p.m. = 3 hours. 3 hours = 180 mins. That’s 49% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship coverage.
Erin Burnett takes over at 7 p.m.
That’s 63% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship coverage.
Surprisingly, Anderson Cooper is nowhere to be found during this huge day for CNN. New guy Chris Cuomo answers the call.
That’s 61% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship.
Donny Duetsch, in for Piers Morgan, gets his chance to impress Zucker with his ability to handle such a massive story.
That’s 73% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship coverage.
As CNN heads into the home stretch, it keeps pace with Duetch’s wall-to-wall coverage.
That’s 72% of broadcast minutes dedicated to Poop Ship coverage.
In this 24-hour period, CNN dedicated 758 broadcast minutes to the Poop Ship. That’s 52% of the day.
Now let’s relieve CNN’s historic day with some of the Poop Ship’s most memorable chyrons.
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emilyintegral 3 months agoThat is a whole lot of poopship. I’m not surprised that CNN would choose to do this, but I am wondering how CNN is still able to pretend that it is a viable purveyor of any kind of important, or even relevant, information.
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mytelevisionsays 3 months agoWell, pretty sure that blew out the budget for the rest of 2013. Good Job, Zuk. Also, get outta here Chris Cuomo.
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lotsofgoats 3 months ago
Clearly “Carnival Poos” is the best subtext. Don’t fix what ain’t broke, and poo is just fine.
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