Use things you already have lying around the house:
Directions at The Dragon’s Fairy Tail. Skeptical toddler not included.
3. A picture frame and some non-toxic paint can turn you into a work of art in minutes:
Just make sure you wear clothes you don’t mine ruining in case the paint doesn’t come off.
If you want to be especially relevant, dress up as something from the news:
It recently washed up on a beach in Florida and caused rampant speculation about its origins. Make it using these instructions; just be sure to size up if it’s for you, since aforementioned guidelines are for a kid’s costume.
Cut holes in a box for your arms and head, and print out or paint the apps you’d like to display (maybe leave off the WebMD Mobile app you consult whenever you cough more than once in the course of a single day).
10. Or Paul Ryan:
Draw on a widow’s peak with some eyeliner or shadow, powder your face extra pale, and if you happen to have a gigantic blazer lying around, throw that on, too. If you really want to take it easy, just print and cut out this handy mask.
11. …A vampire!
Just voluminize the hair, play up the eyebrows, and add blood.
Couple’s costumes that won’t make everybody hate you:
Wear black and white clothes and makeup, and make your own text cards.
15. Tom Hanks’ character and Wilson the volleyball from “Castaway”:
For Tom: get a fake (or real!) beard, a Fed Ex package, and some tattered shorts.
For Wilson: papier-maché a beach ball and paint it white, then paint a face in red (directions here).
All this takes is two large buckets and some paint. Full instructions available here.
Check out the directions for this simple costume for every lazy person here. Because the only thing better than DIY is DIY about DIY.
Group costumes are fun and low-stress (just make sure it still works even if one of your friends decides to leave the party):
18. With matching tracksuits and fake gold medals, you could be the US Olympic Women’s Gymnastics Team:
Pull your ponytails back real tight and practice your McKayla Maroney face.
WIth paint, scissors and cardboard boxes, you can be the most classic of all time-wasting games. Learn how here.
Do you have paper, bright-colored t-shirts and an assortment of friends? Great; you’re basically done making this group costume.
You know who absolutely loves Halloween (or at least doesn’t have a firm enough grasp of the English language to communicate hatred)? Your baby!
Wrap a BabyBjorn or other snuggly in felt and glue popcorn to your baby’s hat. Get a bowtie and suspenders for yourself, and make peace with the fact that you are fake-peddling your child as if it were food.
Throw on your ski gear and make a money sack out of a pillowcase.
The full instructions for this adorable costume are here, but you don’t have to handmake every detail; you could use an old Boy or Girl Scout sash and a backpack rather than making them yourself. Balloons are a must.
26. But remember, just because you can DIY something doesn’t mean you should. Like Snooki and Lorenzo:
Is drawing abs on your baby something you’re actually allowed to do?
27. Or these boobs:
Pro: all this takes is two t-shirts and some extra fabric.
Con: neither of you can ever show your faces in public ever again.
And even if you’re not into wearing a costume yourself, you can always dress up your pet:
These directions are fairly complicated, but even just the hat and the tiny plastic parrot could work wonders.