back to top

We Need To Talk About American Thanksgiving

We love you, but you're doing it wrong.

Posted on

Every year, Americans make a whole whoop-de-doo about Thanksgiving coming up like it's the only Thanksgiving that ever lived.

When you realize Thanksgiving is in a week

For some reason, American Thanksgiving is generally called "Thanksgiving" and Canadian Thanksgiving is always referred to as "Canadian Thanksgiving." HMMM.

And this should be the year that "Canadian Thanksgiving" is finally recognized as "Thanksgiving" — THE Thanksgiving.

And the-less-good-Thanksgiving as "American Thanksgiving" muahahahahaha.


1. Because:

One of my favourite things about Canadian Thanksgiving is NOT seeing Christmas decorations

2. But also, counterpoint, because:

Canadians can want Christmas all we want starting today cause we already had our thanksgiving 😂 ❄⛄🎅🎄🎁

3. Because:

when it's Canadian Thanksgiving but everyone in America is celebrating the day they stole the native American land

4. And because:

Canadian Thanksgiving is in early October but on what incorrect day do the always wrong Americans celebrate it?


7. And:

Canadians be like: wdym thanksgiving is in three weeks?

8. And: