1. When he shared this image.
Photographer captured a photo after they told me I was beautiful.
2. When he revealed his true purpose.
I'm just out here trying to make sure Dylan and I never lose our joint Wikipedia page.
3. When he tweeted a lovely birthday message to his twin.
I'd like to say happy birthday to my partner in crime, my teammate, the person who's always got my back, my twin @BarackObama
4. When he said what we were all thinking.
"Your ability to take your problems to the internet first is very admirable"- not a single goddamn person ever.
5. And when he knew what he truly wanted.
2 scoops please, waffle cup, and the smallest goddamn spoon you have. I'm gunna make this orgasm last all night.
6. When he tweeted the most accurate depiction of a classic "nice guy".
"Where's my hug?" he whimpered, further cementing his position on her no hug list.
7. When he gave some legit dating advice.
If there aren't 36 Ys when he sends you 'hey,' face the music, he's not interested. #heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
8. And shared some advice on flirting.
Show a guy you're interested by kicking him in the nuts. Guys love a little #PlayfulFlirting
9. As well as life pointers...
Show those haters how it's done by hating yourself most.
10. ...and worthy tweeting tips.
You're losing followers because you're not relatable enough. Try mentioning that you eat pizza. If that doesn't work, play the ukulele.
11. When he finally revealed his truth.
The M in my name stands for Mcdonalds, please stop asking
12. When he scalped his twin brother Dylan.
.@dylansprouse, bro you look like a drunk older man on vacation trying to pick up young chicks at the bar.
13. Time and time again.
14. Though Dylan sometimes had the last word.
15. When he tweeted this origin story for Riverdale.
A #Riverdale origin story
16. When he dragged himself.
I'm also wearing a plaid train conductor's hat so why the hell are you trusting my 10yo opinion??? #IWasAMess
17. And when he found out about his own death.
Dead on the inside counts too