1. The neurotic tipper.
A wealthy woman came in and stacked $20 in ones across her table. When something annoyed her — loud customers, other staff, the radio, etc. — she'd take one dollar away. The amount left on the table by the end of her meal was what we got as our tip. She left me one dollar on a $70 meal.
Submitted by Bobby San, Facebook
2. The disastrous frat formal.
We once hosted a Duke frat formal. By the end of the night, they had ripped the sink off the wall, peed all over the walls, and destroyed the artwork. That was a personal favorite to clean up.
Submitted by Robin Moenich, Facebook
3. The nasty con artist.
I was waiting on two women, and I saw one of them pull a hair from her head and place it on her salad. I walked over and asked, "Why are you putting your hair in the salad?" She screamed, "I didn't do that! I found this hair in my salad, and I'm not paying for it!" She yelled for my manager, and I told him what I saw. My manager told me to apologize, but I said, "No." The lady demanded that I be fired and she grabbed her iced tea and dumped it on me. I quit two weeks later, after 13 years at that place.
Submitted by Allison Lott Grabow, Facebook
4. The Valentine's Day stiffers.
For Valentine's Day we have a prix fixe menu. We were only taking reservations that night, and when people called we specifically told them it wasn't the normal menu. A couple came in and immediately complained that we didn't have the regular menu. They ultimately ordered, and when I dropped off their bill they looked astounded and complained to my manager. The bill ended up being $391. They left four, hundred-dollar bills on the table and told me to keep the change. I now hate Valentine's Day.
Submitted by hannahb23
5. The McDonald's givers.
A table of six tipped me a McDonald's Arch Card with no money on it.
Submitted by jlane
6. The offensive duo.
It was a very busy Friday night. I put the plates on the table and warned the guests that the dishes were very hot. Out of nowhere the one guy grabbed my butt and said, "Boy, you're a hefty girl." The other laughed, grabbed his plate, and screamed that it was boiling hot. He then proceeded to call me a fat bitch and told me to get the manager. I went in back and immediately started to cry. I told my manager, who instructed me to "shake it off" and continue serving the table. I refused. My manager ended up finishing the table. They left a $0 tip on an almost $300 check.
Submitted by allisons429
7. The strip club gang.
A guy I was serving requested that I give his change back in all ones because he had plans to go to the strip club that night. After I calmly explained that I didn't quite have enough singles for that, he held out a dollar and proceeded to tell me to "Just wiggle a little bit then." His friends started yelling out suggestions along the lines of "Come on, I just want to see some titties!"
Submitted by mayat
8. The naughty Santa Clauses.
A large party of men dressed as Santa asked if "I had been a bad girl" and begged me to sit on their laps.
Submitted by Lindseyp4
9. The teenage heartbreaker.
Last Valentine's Day, there was a teenage couple sitting at a two-top booth — not enough space for two people on one side — but for some reason, the girl was sitting on the same side as her boyfriend. I went up to see if something was wrong, and as I proceeded to walk closer to their table, I realized she was giving him a hand job. WTF?!
Submitted by kimberleyb3
10. The not-so-happy ending.
I was waiting on a table of seven. Things got incredibly busy in the restaurant, and I did my best to take care of them. I even gave one of the ladies a free dessert, as it was her birthday, and I apologized incessantly for being so busy. They left me $20 on a $230 tab, with a little note about the horrible service and a phone number. I called so I could apologize again for my service and for how busy we were. The man told me my service was so horrible because he "didn't get his dick sucked" and that he wanted to meet up. I promptly hung up and blocked his number.
Submitted by catf48
11. The restaurant harlot.
A group of churchgoers refused to tip me because it was a "form of prostitution."
Submitted by brittanyi48
12. The ex-family friend.
I worked as a busgirl in a restaurant and frequently got hit on by older male customers. One night a 50-year-old man, who I thought looked vaguely familiar, started making crude comments to me. About two minutes later I realized he was a friend of my parents, and the other couples at the table also knew my family. The next time he implied I should "put my boobs in his face" I responded by saying, "I'll tell my parents you said hello."
Submitted by kellyp4ac
13. The pancake hater.
I used to work at a high-end diner. I noticed a couple on a date, and it was clear they were angry about something. I stopped by on my way to the kitchen and asked if everything was all right. The man responded by throwing a syrup-covered pancake in my face and saying, "This is fucking cold." The kicker: It wasn't even my table.
Submitted by kyleb47
14. The spaghetti disaster.
I worked at a pizza shop last summer, and a guy came in asking to order spaghetti and meatballs. I explained to him that there was some sort of issue with our food shipment and it hadn't come that morning, so he'd have to order something else. He then sat in the booth under a framed image of our spaghetti and meatballs and attempted to rip the image off the wall, screaming that we served lies.
Submitted by ericag19
15. The religious racists.
I brought two older men coffees to their booth, and they said: "Thanks for being quick. That's mighty white of you." As if that wasn't bad enough, they also left me a religious pamphlet as a tip.
Submitted by chelseajewells
16. The Army jerks.
I once served a table of 13 Army guys in uniform and one wife. Everything was perfect until one of them asked for my number, to which I politely mentioned being in a relationship. I gave them all separate checks and cashed them out as fast as possible. When I went back to clean up, none of them tipped, and they all wrote mean notes on napkins and receipts. The worst note was from the guy with his wife, which said, "Next time try not to be such a cunt." Another guy covered the table in ranch and wrote "bitch" with his finger.
Submitted by taylerf45
17. The party pooper.
I worked at a fish-and-chips–style restaurant, and we only had one table all morning: an elderly couple and their middle-age son. The lady left for the restroom and was in there for a long time. When she finally came out, her husband paid the bill and left me a $50 tip. Right before leaving, she informed me someone had thrown up all over the toilet. Nope. It was NOT throw up. She shit EVERYWHERE, and it was all liquid. All over the toilet, the floor, the wall, and basically everywhere but inside the toilet. And guess who had it clean it up? Me.
Submitted by katceekay