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A Super Casual List Of All The Queer Women You Crushed On In 2017

Help, I've crushed and I can't get up.

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This year was one big dumpster fire 🔥 but let us — for a moment — indulge in the frivolous joy and distraction that is crushing on completely unobtainable people.

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Here are the ladies you dreamed about this year as you clutched your pillow at night — don't worry, you weren't alone.

1. Stephanie Beatriz

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Where to begin? If you weren't fangirling over this bisexual legend, you certainly jumped on the bandwagon after her character's recent coming-out moment on Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

Instagram: @https://www.instagram.com/iamstephbeatz/?hl=en

“I was so excited about it because as somebody who identifies as bi — queer — I just had nothing like that when I was growing up," the actor told Variety of her character's coming-out, which very much was inspired by her own.

TBH, I'm not sure who to crush on more: Beatriz or her onscreen persona. Let's go with both.

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2. Kehlani

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This crazy-talented singer has been doing her thing for years, but released her first major-label debut album, SweetSexySavage, in January of this year.

Instagram: @https://www.instagram.com/kehlani/?hl=en

Not that she needed the full-length album to be nominated for a Grammy. She nailed that down in 2016.

The singer, who often speaks openly about her bisexuality, uses both male and female pronouns in her lyrics — so start adding to your playlists now.

3. Lena Waithe (and her Emmy)

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When you win an Emmy, maybe it's time to sit back and relax for a while? But Waithe hasn't stopped hustling for a goddamn minute this year. (Seriously, I'm exhausted.)

“I plan on being here a long time,” she told EW. “I plan on building a brand and building a legacy that others can follow and come and tell their stories.”

Be on the look out for her series The Chi (she is working as both a writer and producer), premiering in January.

And until then... rewatch her Emmy speech with some tissues.

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4. Sarah Paulson

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It's almost like this woman is determined to top herself each and every year — not that anybody is complaining. If I spent this crappy year being adorable with my girlfriend and being adorable spotting Madonna, I'd be living my best life too!

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May we all strive to live a *bit* more like Paulson in 2018.

Instagram: @mssarahcatharinepaulson

5. Emma Portner (who happens to be Ellen Page's girlfriend)

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Page is obviously always a Current Crush — but this year we got to fall a little in love with her boo, too. The performance artist has even collaborated with her girlfriend, so you can watch them groove together to your heart's content.

Take a few minutes of your day to ~unwind~ with her, you won't regret it.

Instagram: @emmaportner
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6. Sara Ramirez

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When she isn't appearing on Madam Secretary, she's busy speaking, rallying, and just generally fighting the good fight. In this garbage dumpster of a year? *Swoon*

Speaking of Madame Secretary, Ramirez is serving a LOT of butch realness on set — which she documents for us on her Instagram, thank goodness.

Instagram: @therealsararamirez

7. Annie Clark (and her guitar)

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Annie Clark, aka St. Vincent, dropped her fifth solo album and single-handedly made all your playlists. She's on tour as you're reading this...in case you need a last-minute holiday gift for your boo.

8. Hayley Kiyoko

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Speaking of badass women making music, hello Kiyoko. She's the soundtrack to every single crush you've ever had, every single little heartbreak. She gets it, because she's probably been there too.

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*Dances into another year filled with Kiyoko jams*

9. Evan Rachel Wood

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In the seemingly neverending wait for the next season of Westworld, blessed are we that we can look at Evan Rachel Wood in pantsuits and cowboy boots.

Instagram: @evanrachelwood

And in her "downtime" she also surprised a bunch of queer teens at BuzzFeed's LGBT Prom. *tears*

Keep on keepin' on, cowgirl.

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10. Tegan and Sara (DUH)

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Like a fine wine, this crush only gets better with time.

This year we got to relive the BEST parts of our youth by listening to the The Con 10th-anniversary album. Yes, you still knew all the words. Yes, they still hit home.

Also, unrelated — this tweet happened this year as well. OK, moving on.

@JERDEEEE

11. The one, the only, Kate McKinnon

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The one thing we maybe needed this year was time to laugh, and McKinnon delivered with each and every turn on Saturday Night Live.

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Also, she made out with Gal Gadot. So. Yep.

*Places lovingly on my own grave*

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12. LP

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The curls, the swagger, the voice, or that freaking whistle!? Hard to nail down the most crushable parts of the singer-songwriter known simply as LP. I guess it's the whole package.

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Whistling talents featured here:

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13. Kristen Stewart

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Besides giving us her freshly shaved head, she also gave us the gift of *gestures wildly* THIS sentence on SNL:

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And those four little words meant a whole lot to a whole lot of people.

So, I mean, whew. And while we missed watching her on the big screen for the most part of this year, in 2018 we get to see her star in Lizzie, a psychological thriller based on the 1892 murders of the Borden family. Sign me up!
@lleuadau

So, I mean, whew. And while we missed watching her on the big screen for the most part of this year, in 2018 we get to see her star in Lizzie, a psychological thriller based on the 1892 murders of the Borden family. Sign me up!

But let's not forget that this year the first ever Lesbian Superbowl occurred. You know, when Stewart appeared in that Totino's parody Superbowl ad.

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Thanks for saving 2017, Stew.

Who gave you heart palpitations this year? Add in the comments below!

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