The 18 Stages Of Canada Day, As Told By Dogs
Ruff night, eh bud?
You've waited 365 days for the glorious day! It's your nation's birthday and you kick it off by greeting the whole world with your biggest smile.
But before the festivities begin, it's time to hit the gym or park for a quick workout before you endlessly stuff your face today.
You return home, shower, and then immediately start piecing together your flawless outfit.
You then force all your friends to take a hundred photos until you find a cute one to Instagram.
Your friends, who’ve been waiting on you, last minute doubt your outfit choice after you emerge from your room. They think you’ve overdone it.
But that's when you remember that today is Canada Day and it's your duty to represent on behalf of your entire country.
You then proceed to ignore the haters and fully embrace your adorable Canadian-ness.
Now that you have total confidence in yourself, you round up your squad and head to the crib for a BBQ.
And that's when the drinking begins.
And real celebrations commence. You're ready to let loose and let your Canadian freak flag fly.
You're shamelessly taking selfies left and right.
And your Instagram game is on fleek.
Joanne comes around offering another beer and you look at her like, "Joanne, girl, you know me at all?"
You're soon takin' off your shirt and running around the BBQ like you're the pup of the party.
Meanwhile, your friends are growing a lil' concerned, checking in every hour like "You OK buddy?"
And you're like omgah, guys, stahp. Let me live my truth.
But before fireworks even start, you're already losing momentum and beginning to feel the effects of all those beers and burgers.
By 7 p.m., you regret everything.
But you get yourself together and stumble home, falling asleep and drooling all over your Canadian flag. Now that's a patriot.
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