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1. A humidifier because who needs nosebleeds in their life? Not you!
2. A lint brush – it's even better than rollers to remove fur your clothes, upholstery, and other pet hair magnets around the house.
3. A Vornado air circulator that shoots a high-velocity airstream across the room to encourage more circulation and lower the air temperature up to 10 degrees. It's a surprisingly effective way to increase the effectiveness of your heating or cooling system without spending more on oil, gas, wood, or electricity. I've used it myself — it really works!
4. A pet peak-a-boo bubble made of thick acrylic with a metal frame and available in a 16-inch size reviewers say is wider than anything else on the market and excellent for giving your fur baby a window onto the world beyond the backyard so they're less bothered by strange sounds they can't see.
5. The famous O-Cedar spin mop because it has a microfiber head that picks up dirt and debris like nobody's business, and a bucket with a built-in foot-operated spinner that makes squeezing it out a breeze.
6. A set of scrubbing brushes you can attach to a power drill for intense de-grossifying power
7. An electrical circuit energy monitoring system so you can know ~exactly~ how much power you're using and why. All you have to do is have an electrician install up to eight clamp-on devices, and these connect to an app on your phone using Wi-Fi for real-time insights about your power draw.
8. An orange oil-based pet deodorizer endorsed by Snoop Dogg that will eliminate stains and smells on carpet, tile, wood floors, driveways, litter boxes, grass, pens, and more. Reviewers swear by it to immediately, totally, and efficiently remove the malodorous remnants from your darling pet previously plaguing your floors, furniture, and anywhere else they decided to do their business.
9. Also! A odor-reducing soy pet candle I've used myself to clear the air when the olfactory evidence of our darling Chihuahua got too intense in our tiny apartment and, wow, did it make a difference!
10. An Echo Dot clock, so you can kick your bulky old clock-radio to the curb. It has awesome sound quality, tap-to-snooze, is Alexa-enabled, and also works as a microphone for speaker calls.
11. A Weber smoker that's rock-solid in build quality and performance and can hold just the right temperature for hours so you can actually smoke your meats instead of turning them into disappointing desiccated mess.
12. An inexpensive-but-powerful air purifier so those of you with allergies can finally sleep again.
13. A stainless-steel French press with sterling reviews, to make coffee without any filters or finicky K-Cups (creating less waste!). And French press diehards take notice: reviewers swear it makes even better coffee than glass versions.
14. A smart sprinkler controller that's easy to set up, can be operated from your smartphone, and could help you to save 50% or on your water bill. Reviewers rave about a dedicated app that's improving all the time and excellent customer service.
15. A set of pushup stands with an up to 400-pound capacity for home workouts with a bigger range of motion and higher impact.
16. A Unicorn Gold "before you squat spray" by Squatty Potty to deploy before doing your business that uses particles of ~real gold~ to trap any olfactory evidence of your dirty deeds underwater... and out of everyone else's nose. It's a whole new take on eau de toilette.
17. A LED floodlight for your garage that screws into a regular bulb socket and is so delightfully bright you're going to immediately want to put them anywhere you can, because while you're unafraid of shadow goblins it's still sensible not to risk it.
18. Or! A pair of total blackout curtains because your bedroom window is five feet from a streetlight and you're tired of your darling mother telling you how tired you look on your FaceTime calls.
19. A draft-stopper for your doors to keep all that precious conditioned air you're paying for inside your home, where it belongs.
20. A real Vitamix blender reviewers say is better than anything else on the market, with smoot power to crush, blend, and liquefy just about anything you throw in it, for years to come.
21. A dehumidifier to take that sweat-inducing, mold-growing, live-sucking stickiness known as high humidity out of your indoor air.
22. A Bissell bagless vacuum reviewers swear is better than a Dyson, for a fraction of the cost.
23. A standing desk so you can spend those interminable Zoom calls counting the pimples on your boss's forehead instead of lamenting how much your back and neck hurt from sitting all day.
24. A scouring paste that'll do most of the hard work of cleaning for you, so you can spend less time scrubbing and save your hand strength for more important things, like scrolling through your Instagram.
25. A cooling mattress topper that's going to make it even harder to get out of bed in the morning.
26. A rust-resistant OXO chopper for when you want to make your own pico de gallo and realize staring at the vegetables resenting all the effort it's going to take isn't going to get you very far.
27. An easy-to-use Shake 'N Feed Miracle Gro that you sprinkle just once every three months for veritably explosive results.
28. A weighted blanket available in 5 to 30 pounds to keep the jitters at bay so you can get a full night of rest and relaxation.
Some reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.