People Shared Their Super Unpopular Marriage Opinions, And I Can't Even Be Mad At Some Of Them

"You should plan for divorce when you get married."

We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us their super-controversial and unpopular marriage opinions, and wow, they had lots to say! Here are some of the most eyebrow-raising responses!

1. "You should never get married without living with someone first."

Fox

"You don't really know someone until you have witnessed them in their home environment. It can be scary!"

—little_foot

2. Alternatively, some people believe that "a couple should not live together before they get married."

"The main reason is that it's much harder to break up when you live together. So the relationship may be over, but people end up staying together because they feel they have to."

—katlynj44a138513

3. "You should plan for divorce when you get married."

NBC / Via giphy.com

"People think it’s taboo even to entertain the idea that you might get divorced, but statistically, a lot of people do. I believe prenups should be normalized (even if you aren’t rich) to protect each other if one of you has a ton of debt. Don’t just ask yourself if this is someone you want to be married to or have kids with. Ask if this is someone you can co-parent with and divorce amicably within the unfortunate event things do go south."

—defpotec

4. "Nobody should propose out of the blue. It needs to be discussed, so nobody makes a fool out of themselves."

—gfacerush7

5. "It's not a good idea to get married before your mid-twenties."

Fox

"The brain doesn't even stop developing before 25. I have known high-school sweethearts who have made it, but they had extreme stamina and endured a ton of problems that nearly destroyed their lives before they were even 20. So even if you think they're the one, wait until later to commit. If it's real, they'll wait."

—colleend9

6. "Marriage is for people who need validation."

"They need to stand up in front of loads of people, often many they aren't even close to, to get their validation. It just plays into the 'I found someone; therefore, I succeeded' societal norm."

—slytherinshark

7. "Eloping and smaller weddings are vastly underrated."

NBC

"They're cheaper, less fuss, and the focus is on you and your partner's love, as it should be. Big weddings have turned into ridiculously expensive parties where a million expectations are surrounding it."

—thatgirla

8. "I don't think wives should take their husband's last names."

"I think it's an old-fashioned custom, and I've always found it kind of creepy, even when I was a little kid. I have a few friends who combined their surnames after marriage that I get, but otherwise...not so much. Thankfully I married someone that agrees with me." 

—emilym4e8497a33

9. "A prenup is beneficial to everyone."

Getty Images

"Sign one! I know people always say it's not good to go into a marriage with the plan of divorcing, but a prenup is not that. A prenup is a protection for both of you for whatever may come. It's better to be wary than to get surprised."

—sarar666

10. "Platonic/friendship marriages shouldn't be so taboo and frowned upon."

"Not everyone desires a romantic relationship but may have a close friend they live with, and marriage can be so beneficial when it comes to finances, health, or other issues that may arise. So it shouldn't be looked at as 'weird' if someone wants to marry their platonic best friend!" 

—frecklefreak14

11. "I feel like anything less than two to three years of dating is too soon to decide that you want to be married for life."

Craig Barritt/ Kevin Mazur/ Jason LaVeris / Getty Images

"I know there are outliers, but it seems like practically every marriage ends in divorce."

—abnormpsych

12. "You should have separate homes, separate bank accounts, etc., aka living apart together."

"Sleepovers and such are fine, but I want to keep my own space. I'm an introvert who values her alone time and needs it to recharge. I'm not off doing stuff I'm not supposed to do; I just really like my alone time."

—winsregina

13. "A (potentially temporary) loss of sexual attraction is not always a good reason to divorce."

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"A marriage shouldn’t be based primarily on sexual attraction as much as romantic/personal attraction. Those who rushed into marriage based on initial sexual attraction are problematic not because of an EVENTUAL lack of attraction as much as an INITIAL lack of interest in focusing on a long-term relationship. If you aren’t willing to work with a person once the honeymoon phase is over, you shouldn’t marry that person."

—keltonh

14. "I enjoy that my husband and I have completely different friend groups."

"You always see sitcoms where part of the 'gang' is a married couple, but that would drive me nuts. I like going to events with his friends and vice versa, but it would be way too much if we had the exact same friends."

—kandim

15. "Marriage counseling and couples retreats are great investments even for happy couples."

NBC

"You don't need to feel like there's something you need to fix, or that you need a 'tune-up,' to get huge benefits from it. It's a plan for your future on par with retirement savings. You're spending money now to live better later, and honestly, it's not a bad couples' activity to focus on each other. Get some dinner after counseling, and it's pretty much a date night."

—amberm43081e2b1

16. "Some people are not suited for marriage."

"I hate that the general public pities single people who choose to stay single. None of us have any idea how happy or unhappy a person is. Yes, even if we know their marital status. We all have different priorities in life, and, for some, marriage would not be fulfilling." 

—hiitsnicetomeetyou

17. "A party celebrating love is cool, but the signing of a contract and involving the government is odd."

Getty Images

"Maybe because I'm a woman, and historically that contract would not have been in my favor."

—sarab4c6ea245e

18. "Family should not be involved too much in marriage and relationships."

"I've heard many stories about people giving into their family members' and in-laws' demands about things regarding their relationship, and 99.9%, it doesn't go well. Although family members can mean well, sometimes what they want might not be beneficial to the couple. The couple should have more freedom to make decisions for themselves and do what is best for them without the involvement of family members."

—corgiprincessvictoria

19. "Huge white wedding dresses are ugly and boring. It's a fact."

Fox

—bethmargaret

20. And last but not least, "True love isn't a thing, and there isn't just one person you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with."

"What happens is you find someone who is in the same place in life as you, and you form a bond, but even that may not last a lifetime, and that is OK." 

—katherineatkins

Do you have any unpopular marriage opinions that you think should've been on this list? Feel free to drop them in the comments below!

Note: Submissions were edited for length and/or clarity.