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Dec 16, 2014

12 Reasons To Suspect Mrs. Claus Is Cheating On You

Ho-Ho-How could you?

1. She just seems distant nowadays.

Getty Images/iStockphoto Jani Bryson

2. She never sits on your lap anymore.

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3. She always puts on fancy new bonnets before going out, but she never puts on fancy bonnets for you anymore.

Getty Images/iStockphoto chrisbrignell

WHO IS SHE TRYING TO IMPRESS?

4. When she goes out "for candy canes" but doesn't get home until 4 a.m. and didn't even get candy canes.

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It's an extra slap in the face that there are no candy canes.

5. And she also comes home reeking of elf.

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6. Your highest ranking workshop elf, Winkles, won't make eye contact with you anymore.

Getty Images/iStockphoto crspix

7. When she bakes cookies for you that are clearly GUILT COOKIES.

Getty Images/iStockphoto Jani Bryson

8. Then you look on her phone and see this text from Winkles the elf.

9. And this text.

10. And this text

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WINKY FACE ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?

11. And this text.

12. And this text.

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More from Santa: 11 Kids Who Are Definitely On The Naughty List

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